Painful, Bikes and Kids: Nature is harsh

Nature is harsh

By fallsdownplenty45 - 02/06/2009 11:08 - Taiwan

Today, I went biking. I attempted a large hill and lost control, slipped, and fell ten feet into a sewage pit. Riding home covered in crap, my sock caught my chain and I flipped over my bike. My dad had to spray me with the garden hose, bloody and shitty, in the front yard. FML

I agree, your life sucks 72 931

You deserved it 6 758

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Same thing different taste

I want to ride my bicycle

By Anonymous - 27/06/2021 14:02

Today, I decided to ride my bike for the first time in over a year. It was seemingly going well, until I got to the first hill. As I began to ascend, I was trying a bit to hard and shit my pants, 8 kilometers away from my house. FML

I agree, your life sucks 879

You deserved it 301

By cathugger - 13/07/2019 16:30

Today, while hurrying by bike to an appointment, my chain broke. I quickly got off the road and managed to fix it on the sidewalk, covering my hands in black smear. Dirty but confident about my repair skills, I got up. A second later, felt something warm running down my neck. Bird poop. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 927

You deserved it 130

By SmellyLeg - 20/11/2017 15:00

Today, my bike slipped on ice and I slid spectacularly for several meters. While my helmet saved me from a cracked skull, nothing could protect me from landing leg-first in the dog poop somebody hadn't bothered to pick up. I had to go to school like that. FML

I agree, your life sucks 3 323

You deserved it 323

By OMGWTF - 13/08/2009 02:01 - United States

Today, while biking home from work, a 12 mile trip, I was speeding down a long hill and my jean pant leg got caught in the chain. It ripped, and then the rest of my pant leg ripped off. I had to bike 10 more miles half naked along the highway. FML

I agree, your life sucks 42 143

You deserved it 6 148

By me - 11/11/2010 18:11 - United States

Today, my friend and I were racing on our bicycles when my chain snapped. I went over the handlebars and slid, on my back, for about ten feet. FML

I agree, your life sucks 30 281

You deserved it 4 901

By Lawrence - 06/08/2009 04:55 - United States

Today, I was riding my bike to the local grocery store to pick up some supplies for dinner. On the way down, traveling down a hill, I hit a drain with no lid. I went to grab hold of the nearest object to soften my fall. That nearest object was a barbed wire fence. FML

I agree, your life sucks 51 683

You deserved it 3 739

Don't mind me

By Moon-chan - 30/06/2019 00:30 - Netherlands

Today, I was cycling home. On the way, my laces got stuck in the bicycle pedals and I couldn't move the foot that got stuck. The bicycle fell over, with me attached to it. Everyone was looking at me like, "What are you doing?" FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 534

You deserved it 352

By maybenot - 06/08/2012 23:25 - United Kingdom

Today, whilst on a cycling holiday, in a somewhat hungover state, I accidentally chained my bike to the back of someone else's caravan. As I walked away, I heard a loud scraping noise. I turned around and watched my bike get dragged down a long gravel road and through a pile of horse shit. FML

I agree, your life sucks 6 827

You deserved it 29 942

Like an animal

By limeychefboy - 23/02/2018 01:30

Today, I was on my motorbike 200km from home, in the middle of nowhere, when I needed to poop, so I found a wooded area and did my thing. As I was climbing back up, I knocked my helmet from its perch and watched it roll right into what I’d just left. FML

I agree, your life sucks 3 729

You deserved it 2 267

Airtight

By LanaStidolph - 02/12/2017 06:00

Today, I bought shampoos and household chemicals and was heading home on my bike when it started to rain. I felt a weird burning sensation down my back so I stopped and got off the bike. My backpack and jeans were covered in foam. FML

I agree, your life sucks 3 525

You deserved it 409

poolshark 0

Tuesday 2 June 2009 20:17

You might want to look into a tetanus shot and some antibiotics... feces and open wounds do not mix.

padlarf 14

Tuesday 2 June 2009 20:09

Holy shit man!

Comments

layzejerze20006 0

Wednesday 3 June 2009 3:06

Wow. You've taken the cake for one of the best FMLs I've ever read. Congratulations. :D

Ariel09 0

Wednesday 3 June 2009 3:06

#18 swearing fail. P.S. Why couldn't you get sprayed in the backyard where nobody could see you? Most people have a gate/fence to their backyard... And yeah that sucks.

kk3211 0

Wednesday 3 June 2009 3:07

its probably best that you stay away from the bike for a while. surprised you didn't get hit by a bus covered in rubbing alcohol.

illeyad 0

Wednesday 3 June 2009 3:08

holy crap that sucks. You should visit a doctor asap to make sure you don't have any infections. I think it is safe t say that this is one of the top fml's i have read.