Compliment and Love: Nice! - FML

Nice!

By ugh thanks - This FML is from back in 2014 but it's good stuff - United States - Dayton

Today, I asked my husband to tell me something nice about myself. He thought for a few moments, then said, "Uh, you shit quietly." FML

I agree, your life sucks 47 068

You deserved it 6 907

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Top comments

flufee2 27

Sunday 17 August 2014 22:30

What more could a guy ask for?!

Liamj774 36

Sunday 17 August 2014 22:30

Well that's because girls don't poop. Duh

Comments

Earths_Venus 25

Monday 18 August 2014 0:50

I think it's kind of a crap compliment tbh

FMLniick 8

Monday 18 August 2014 0:52

At least you shit quietly. rare quality for anyone!

Kyle1dc 17

Monday 18 August 2014 0:53

He probably had a shitty time afterwards.

classycoop 12

Monday 18 August 2014 0:58

YDI for looking for attention

celinadepp 21

Monday 18 August 2014 1:25

At least you don't shit extremely loud!

nikitol 8

Monday 18 August 2014 1:32

At least u don't poop loud!

graphicstyle7 17

Monday 18 August 2014 1:52

1. It's ok to ask for a boost when you need it. 2. You may want to get some marriage counseling, he seems to be at a loss on why he's with you and why he supposedly loves you. If he does not go, go to a counselor yourself.

stumpyj 10

Monday 18 August 2014 2:43

I don't think it's that serious. You have no context to base #2 on. We don't know what was going on when she asked him to tell her something nice about herself. I think she put him on the spot and he came up with a stupid panicked answer. OP should try again and explain why she needs the boost.

more4me 27

Monday 18 August 2014 9:13

Don't overreact ! Maybe OP is happily married to someone who has a unique kind of humor !

MissHeartSihk 26

Monday 18 August 2014 2:40

Did he say anything after that?

MisterGasMoney 16

Monday 18 August 2014 2:46

Intestinal fortitude right there, OP.

SoulReaper8858 2

Monday 18 August 2014 3:16

hey, that's something to be proud of. I wish my girl had that gift. when she craps, it sounds like a waterfall.

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The Top

Today, I finally decided to sleep with my boyfriend. It was my first time and I was really nervous so when he was being all romantic with candles and wine I went a bit overboard and drank too much. I passed out. I woke up a few hours later, still a virgin, and in a puddle of my own piss. FML

I agree, your life sucks 9 970

You deserved it 34 683

Today, I made roast beef with mashed potatoes and green beans for dinner. My 8-year-old daughter was crying and gagging the whole time, and eventually said between sobs, "Can't you just beat me and send me to bed hungry instead?" I have no clue where she got that idea from. FML

I agree, your life sucks 4 246

You deserved it 459

The Top

Today, I was running on a track above a basketball court. I noticed several cute guys playing a pick-up game, so I tried to run my hardest. Not paying attention, I didn't hear when they warned me about the ball flying towards me. It hit me in the head, I then ran into a wall and face-planted. FML

I agree, your life sucks 20 421

You deserved it 40 954

Today, I went to visit my husband's grave. I was unable to mourn in peace because some teenagers were smoking pot and talking about a government conspiracy "to change the way gravity works" on the next grave over. FML

I agree, your life sucks 39 603

You deserved it 2 303

Today, I found out that even though my girlfriend is on the pill, and even though my girlfriend took emergency contraception, she became pregnant days after the first time we had sex without a condom. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 360

You deserved it 1 169

Today, I went downstairs early in the morning to watch a movie. As I walked into the living room and reached for the light switch, I heard my dad say, "Knew you'd change your mind. Get them off." followed by the sound of a zipper being undone. I've never been so mortified in my life. FML

I agree, your life sucks 37 296

You deserved it 2 752

Today, I actually heard my 14 year old son muse to himself, "If I can drive drunk in Grand Theft Auto, how hard could it be in real life?" FML

I agree, your life sucks 45 061

You deserved it 13 450

Today, my boyfriend once again asked me if I could “not get so wet down there” when we have sex, because it “feels funny”. Ummm, even if I could control it, I never knew it was a problem. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 421

You deserved it 170