No thanks

By Kara - This FML is from back in 2011 but it's good stuff - United States

Today, my downstairs neighbor had a home birth. Not only did I hear eighteen hours of uninterrupted screaming, they called me afterwards to ask if I could come over to help them clean up. FML
I agree, your life sucks 42 039
You deserved it 2 868
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Top comments

txgirl2013 14

Like a good neighbor OP is there :) ha

363 5
LiL_Dub 2

Gross! No way, they need to clean up their own bodily fluids!

189 1

Comments

newlove_fml 0

Comment moderated for rule-breaking.

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5 58
Baytheshark 14

Okay. This pissed me off. The lady CHOSE, did you hear that? CHOSE, to have a home birth. She had no right to ask OP to help clean up, unless they were close. But even then, she, pardon my French, ******* CHOSE to have a ******* home birth.

38 0
THE_A_TEEN 27

Newlove, JUST SHUT UP!!!! The op HAS NO OBLIGATION to clean up the afterbirth (i'm not sure if it's the placenta). NOT HER RESPONSIBILITY. You got a shit-load of replies saying the same damn thing already. Just shut the **** up!!

20 1
cwc2311 4

Then they could have had the baby at a hospital

2 6
Kirlyfoo 9

Ya shut up newlove , its fml not sunday school. Pull ur thumb out of ur ass and laugh or be all like "ooooo fyl"

1 4
KaylieeJay 4

Just because someone decided to have a baby, with or without drugs, doesn't mean any human being within a 100 mile radius becomes their personal slave to them. They chose a home birth, they chose to be responsible for the clean up. I'm sure the father/actual close family members/midwife can clean up- not some neighbour that may or may not even have a relationship with them.

22 0
Panic_Moon 4

Let me clarify: nobody here shares your opinion.

11 1
rainydayz133 6

I understand that you want to help the lady but why don't they call a family member or a doctor? Not your neighbor.

3 0
ImaginaryFoe 0

A. There is a reply button. B. Your half-arsed opinion didn't need clarification. C. I doubt OP is from Samaria (not really the point and I know what you meant but the list looked short). D. How much responsibility do you take for your neighbours' decisions? You're either frequently taken advantage of or a hypocrite.

3 1
cwc2311 4

52 - I most certainly did read the FML. If the neighbors didn't want to clean up or knew they would need help, then they should have had the child at a hospital. Would've saved OP from having to listen to it for 18 hours too.

2 1
Hungry_Panda 3

Offer to help hold the newborn while they clean the damn mess haha

3 2
Baytheshark 14

Not the best idea, if your violent....

0 1
Conley78643 0

I was in the room when my niece was born and i do not remember it being very messy. When i read this post though i pictured blood dripping from the walls and ceiling and the husband with goo dripping off him. Lol. Thank god you don't see the mess when it's you having the baby.

8 0
DocBastard 38

They only TOLD you it was a home birth. It was actually an 18 hour BDSM orgy. You were invited, but you apparently lost the invitation. Go grab your broom, a few rolls of paper towels, and a gallon of bleach.

18 0
THE_A_TEEN 27

More instruments of BDSM sex? I'm not sure they would handle that broom and the bleach. Think of them, don't be a bastard!!

1 0
4rmMiami 4

Gross... I think that is so rude of a neighbor to be asking to help you to clean up after the birth, I would say that I can't and I'll just buy a gift for the child. But hell no!! I am not going to clean up. They should have went to the hospital and had them clean it up.

8 0
dtemple1110 6

The ****?! Who the hell would ask someone other than family to come help clean up the after birth? So inconsiderate... and weird!

9 0
rhysfucker 24

Sorry, OP...unless you're really good friends with the new parents, the answer should be "No thanks". On a side note, having a baby at home is much more risky for the mother and child if any complications arise.

8 2
nursejohio 8

Unless she's having a normal, low risk pregnancy... Home birth is actually safer for mom and baby in that case. We (high risk L&D nurse here) use waaaaaay more interventions than we need to sometimes, and sometimes that creates more complications.

3 0
NoogetySensation 0

Help clean up? Did they do it over the floor and spread it around? Must have been a violent birth

5 0