Love, Parents and Argument: Not now, guys

Not now, guys

By Sonofa - 17/05/2013 15:52 - Canada - Cold Lake

Today, I brought my girlfriend home for the first time to meet my parents. They were having a heated argument because my mom had bought "the wrong toilet paper" and my dad was angry because "she should know that he has a sensitive anus." FML

I agree, your life sucks 53 246

You deserved it 3 810

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Same thing different taste

By Mr_poole - 18/05/2013 20:06 - United States - Castle Rock

Today, I brought my girlfriend home for the first time. I was really excited to introduce her to my parents, until we found my mother waving around a wooden sword, and my father trying to shove my sister into the dryer. FML

I agree, your life sucks 50 878

You deserved it 5 357

Nice to know

By justin bieber's nutsack - 06/06/2015 07:32 - United Kingdom

Today, I brought my girlfriend home to introduce her to my parents. As we arrived, my grandpa was leaving the bathroom. He looked over at my girlfriend with a worried expression and said, "Never take a shit in this place. Feels like I wiped my arsehole with sandpaper." FML

I agree, your life sucks 29 262

You deserved it 2 804

By Anonymous - 16/02/2011 17:03 - United Kingdom

Today, I had my boyfriend come over for dinner for the first time. It was all going well until my dad started explaining to my boyfriend how to use toilet paper. He even demonstrated it. FML

I agree, your life sucks 34 945

You deserved it 3 245

By thanksmom - 09/01/2013 19:57 - United States - Tucson

Today, I took my boyfriend to meet my parents. As he was loading his truck, I went inside to take a surreptitious shit. I ended up clogging the toilet, and so the first thing my mom said to my boyfriend was, "You'll have to find another bathroom; she just clogged it all up." FML

I agree, your life sucks 33 656

You deserved it 7 793

By Anonymous - 12/04/2013 09:24 - Australia

Today, I finally invited my girlfriend over to meet my oddball parents. The first words out of my dad's mouth were, "So, you're the silly girl who agreed to date my dickhead son." It went downhill from there. FML

I agree, your life sucks 49 763

You deserved it 6 945

By anon - 16/03/2015 04:10 - Canada - Mississauga

Today, I met my boyfriend's parents for the first time. I thought everything went well, until I got a text from him later saying, "Come on mom, she isn't THAT bad." FML

I agree, your life sucks 33 763

You deserved it 2 594

Good one

By bf. - 19/12/2013 02:59 - Canada - London

Today, I met my girlfriend's parents for the first time. Dinner was going well until her dad secretly fed the asparagus to the dog under the table, and then "discovered" what a childish thing I had done. My girlfriend believed him. FML

I agree, your life sucks 43 229

You deserved it 3 002

By a critically injured shitehawk - 25/04/2015 10:34 - United Kingdom - York

Today, I brought my girlfriend home to introduce to my parents. My dad thought it would be hilarious to fill some clear bags full of flour, then pretend he was sampling a cocaine shipment when she arrived. She excused herself very quickly and isn't answering my calls. FML

I agree, your life sucks 35 207

You deserved it 3 021

Thanks dad

By Anonymous - 19/09/2013 17:32 - Canada - Brantford

Today, I took my girlfriend home to meet my parents. My dad was having a bad day and was rude from the outset, but things went to total hell when he started screaming that he'd "kill" our microwave if it didn't "shut the hell up". My girlfriend now thinks we're a family of abusive psychos. FML

I agree, your life sucks 42 886

You deserved it 3 329

Smells like teen shit

By great 1st impression - 25/05/2014 16:09 - United Kingdom - Derby

Today, I met my boyfriend's parents for the first time over dinner. I had to use the bathroom part way through, and ended up taking the foulest dump of my life. I cracked open a window on my way out, but my boyfriend's dad went in soon after, quickly retching and booming, "What the fuck?!" FML

I agree, your life sucks 52 976

You deserved it 7 931

DDCA 24

Friday 17 May 2013 20:23

Talk about being butt hurt.

Kuhu1993 21

Friday 17 May 2013 20:24

She'd get it. Even she has parents. :D

Comments

andreablah 9

Monday 20 May 2013 5:13

These things are important.

NAndrakin 4

Monday 20 May 2013 7:57

He's not the only one.

missd420 16

Friday 30 August 2013 21:36

Is it sad that I can see my husband and I having that same argument?

Keywords

Miscellaneous Sleep Awkward Love Weddings Television Money Relatable Snow Transportation Annoying Family Kids Pregnancy Mental health Empathy Toxic Food Animals Cats Argument Gamers Health Valentine's Day Gross Homeowners Home improvement Babysitter Drugs Music

The Top

Today, I have accepted that if I try to spend time with my girlfriend, she will come up with any excuse to avoid me, but when I want to do something by myself, she will be at my elbow every ten seconds, loudly whining that she wants to spend time together and that I'm mean. Talking has yet to fix anything. FML

I agree, your life sucks 872

You deserved it 212

Today, I gave my boyfriend an ultimatum: me, the girl who’s been there through thick and thin for the past 2 years, supported him through his unemployment and death of his father, and who cooks and cleans for him every day, or the girl coworker who he’s been emotionally cheating on me with. Guess who he chose. FML

I agree, your life sucks 624

You deserved it 184

The Top

Today, my husband answered a FaceTime call from his mother not 30 seconds after sex. I was naked in bed next to him. FML

I agree, your life sucks 6 790

You deserved it 602

Today, I bought my first ever vibrator after months of wanting one. Apparently, I bought a cheap product, because it broke and started going off by itself later. It shook my whole dresser while my best friend and I were in the room. I couldn't get it to shut off. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 160

You deserved it 275

Today, I walked into our office and everyone started laughing. It turns out that I'd been the only one not in on the joke to come in dressed as a character from our favorite TV show. However, I'd dressed in normal work clothes. I’m the boss. FML

I agree, your life sucks 292

You deserved it 109

Today, an exchange student was telling us how he once used a black light to detect semen stains on his "abstinent" ex-girlfriend's face. I called him out on the obvious lie, saying it's an old urban legend. He wigged out, screamed that I'm a "bastarding shite-wank" and ran out of class. FML

I agree, your life sucks 24 281

You deserved it 5 451

Today, I looked into my fiance's Twitter to see he follows tons of "nipslips" and adult/porn pages, even though we've had numerous fights with him making excuses as to how/why I've been "misunderstanding" past issues. At this point I've pretty much bet my life on this guy. FML

I agree, your life sucks 994

You deserved it 898

Today, my elderly neighbor had asked me to take her to her early morning doctor's appointment. I arrived at her house at 7:30 as agreed, and she appeared to have forgotten who I was. She started lobbing eggs out of her window at me, telling me she wasn't interested in what I was selling. FML

I agree, your life sucks 34 695

You deserved it 2 631