Intimacy, Awkward and Parents: Oh, hi!

Oh, hi!

By mubaki - 24/07/2009 17:07 - United States

Today, my little brother texted me informing me that our father has "become a nudist" since returning home from a month-long trip abroad. I thought he was joking or exaggerating, but when I went over to say hi, the first thing I saw upon walking through the door was my dad's droopy ball sac. FML

I agree, your life sucks 57 015

You deserved it 4 537

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Same thing different taste

Go home

By Anonymous - 16/09/2023 10:00

Today, I saw my dad naked. How? He came into the room I was staying in, drunk. I'm gonna need a whole lot of therapy. FML

I agree, your life sucks 609

You deserved it 93

America! F*** yeah!

By scarredforlife - 08/08/2009 01:34 - United States

Today, it was my mom's birthday, I planned to wish her a happy birthday as she woke up. I opened the door to her room, only to see my dad dancing around in an American flag thong. Grimacing in pain, I closed the door right away. Not only am I forever disturbed, but now my dad is asking me how he looks naked. FML

I agree, your life sucks 46 228

You deserved it 7 219

By Good morning to you all - 20/06/2018 20:30

Today, since my dad decided he's tired of not being completely comfortable in his own home, he now wears only a knee-length robe without underwear so he can "really enjoy the breeze". I've seen more balls in a few days than a pro baseball player does his entire career. FML

I agree, your life sucks 3 821

You deserved it 414

By disgusteddaughter - 13/06/2011 08:58 - Australia

Today, my mum's boyfriend came back from a job up-state. He is now walking around the house in boxers to "show off his tan". He has a beer gut and a hairy back. FML

I agree, your life sucks 35 754

You deserved it 3 425

Junk reveal

By Anonymous - 04/03/2023 12:00

Today, when I was visiting my dad in the ICU, the nurse was trying to help him sit upright and his dick and balls plopped out of his hospital gown for everyone to see. FML

I agree, your life sucks 955

You deserved it 151

By Anonymous - 26/06/2012 22:04 - United Kingdom - Edinburgh

Today, I was at the beach with my parents, and I went for a swim in the sea. I got out and my parents started laughing their asses off. It wasn't until my dad pulled a condom out of my hair that I realized what they were laughing at. My dad even took a picture. FML

I agree, your life sucks 29 396

You deserved it 2 300

By meeeoow - 22/01/2011 10:05 - Australia

Today, my drunken father decided to walk my quiet street naked. FML

I agree, your life sucks 30 665

You deserved it 2 777

By indianaxx - 30/01/2010 17:21 - France

Today, my dad came out of our hotel bathroom with nothing but a wash-cloth over his crotch and said, "Look! This place has cotton loincloths!" in front of my wedding party. FML

I agree, your life sucks 31 945

You deserved it 2 457

Mortifying

By whatashame - This FML is from back in 2009 but it's good stuff - United States

Today, my dad was on the couch and I sat down next to him. As I was reading a text message, I saw my dad's fat stomach sticking out so I patted it. After the first two pats, I realized I was patting in the wrong place. I patted the family jewels. FML

I agree, your life sucks 22 555

You deserved it 80 735

By smf_ds - 31/07/2015 20:48 - Portugal - Rebordosa

Today, I witnessed my dad spreading his ass cheeks to show my mom the rashes his hemorrhoids are giving him. FML

I agree, your life sucks 25 072

You deserved it 2 223

Will09 0

Friday 24 July 2009 23:13

....giggity

esines 9

Sunday 15 April 2012 17:24

Overreacting? I don't know about you, but I definitely don't want to see my dads droopy ball sac...

Comments

trinigirl 0

Wednesday 26 August 2009 8:57

Have some respect for those droopy balls. Half of your DNA, hence very existance came from them.

Makaloraii 0

Wednesday 9 September 2009 20:34

first who cares, honestly

jefecito_fml 0

Monday 8 March 2010 19:29

shut the **** up. this is as fake as Santa claus you ******* retards.

magankn 0

Wednesday 13 July 2011 6:44

you must be pretty dang short or your dad pretty tall or your perverted if when he opens the door the first thing you take a glimpse at is down below

MwahFMLS 6

Wednesday 3 August 2011 11:23

That's hot.

MwahFMLS 6

Wednesday 3 August 2011 11:24

who else but quagmire? it's quagmire, quagmire, Giggity Giggity, let's have sex!

Lilark 0

Monday 26 September 2011 5:18

...gross? Old penis stops being cool with the old part..

Disembob 16

Sunday 30 October 2011 11:31

I never thought I'd hear "Droopy Ball Sac" in my entire life

BoredReader88 5

Tuesday 8 November 2011 6:16

#1: Obviously OP cares or she wouldn't have posted this

vinchenzy 0

Tuesday 6 December 2011 1:28

Were his nuts in your face? Cuz I belive I would have seen his face first

Keywords

Awkward Love My ex AITA Jealousy Friends Poopoo peepee Health Embarrassing Sports Proposal Annoying Snow Cold weather Cheating Work Money Relatable Parenting Kids DIY Accident Parents Medication ADHD Weather Miscellaneous Am I overreacting? Relationship advice Weird

The Top

Today, after about a year of keeping it a secret from my girlfriend, I told her about my foot fetish. She said "EWWWWWWWW!" and left. She's ignoring my calls and has changed her relationship status to single on Facebook. FML

I agree, your life sucks 23 573

You deserved it 6 604

Today, my mom picked my ex-boyfriend up early from school to take him to see a special screening of a documentary that's showing in town. She left me after school for an hour and a half because they ended up going out for coffee afterwards. FML

I agree, your life sucks 35 157

You deserved it 2 693

The Top

Today, my boyfriend thought it would be wise to joke that we needed to postpone our reunion for another week. We haven't seen each other for almost 4 months, due to events out of our control. He thinks he's funny. He'll get punched when we do see each other again. FML

I agree, your life sucks 760

You deserved it 1 215

Today, I got rear-ended at a stoplight by a woman who had been doing her make-up while driving. She didn't get out to see if I was okay until she had finished perfectly applying both lipliner and gloss. FML

I agree, your life sucks 58 884

You deserved it 2 748

Today, I was working at our garage sale with my dad. I sat outside for 2 hours, talked to three people, and sold nothing. My dad came outside and got angry at me, so I told him to give it a shot. He sold 3 things to the first guy who walked in. FML

I agree, your life sucks 7 051

You deserved it 1 038

Today, I had to listen to fellow classmates whine about selling one of their many houses, while I can barely afford to pay for a $100 textbook. FML

I agree, your life sucks 47 875

You deserved it 3 463

Today, I had some pretty bad stomach pain, so I went to the bathroom. After a few minutes, two girls walked in, taking stalls next to me. That's when my farts began to get very large and explosive. Not only did they break into laughter, they waited for me to come out. FML

I agree, your life sucks 78 486

You deserved it 5 202

Today, I ran into an attractive friend of a friend who I hadn't seen since a night out last month. I tried my best to be friendly and interesting, but he still seemed awkward. Later I find out that last time he saw me, I was blind drunk and vomiting after propositioning him all evening. FML

I agree, your life sucks 10 964

You deserved it 31 217