Work: Oh what a night

Oh what a night

By EmployeeOfTheMonth - 09/06/2013 23:33 - United States - Montpelier

Today, I attempted to make a good impression amongst new coworkers by volunteering to be the designated driver at my work party. What did that get me? A backseat full of puke and some idiot too drunk to remember where he lived. FML

I agree, your life sucks 39 465

You deserved it 9 137

Winter: Snow and Funny News
Snuggle up and laugh with our winter stories, where snow isn't the only thing sliding around! More…

Previous FML Next FML

Same thing different taste

Party hard

By Coldflame - 06/03/2010 15:22 - United States

Today, I was designated driver for my friends. This entailed standing around in the cold for 3 hours, not drinking, dealing with drunk people, and oh yeah, I almost forgot, cleaning up vomit from my hair, my clothes, and my new car. FML

I agree, your life sucks 27 136

You deserved it 7 527

By sma93 - 17/12/2016 18:30 - United States - Baldwin

Today, after my work's Christmas party, everyone got so drunk that I had to help one of my only sober co-workers take everyone home and clean up vomit. FML

I agree, your life sucks 7 720

You deserved it 587

By Anonymous - 16/07/2009 01:53 - United States

Today, my friend got drunk. He always pukes when he gets drunk, but I decided to drive him home anyway. He didn't puke the whole ride. We arrived at his house and he got out. Right as I was about to drive away he stumbled back to my car because he forgot his wallet. He grabbed it and puked on me. FML

I agree, your life sucks 44 427

You deserved it 6 089

By shwasted - 22/02/2010 05:17 - United States

Today, I had one of the worst first dates of my life. After leaving the restaurant early, we went to a party to try and salvage the night. My date then got wasted, ended up puking in the back seat of my car on the way home, then lied about it. My night ended with me cleaning vomit out of my car. FML

I agree, your life sucks 27 556

You deserved it 3 797

By IhatebeingtheDD - 15/10/2010 14:08 - United States

Today, I was the designated driver for my friend's 21st birthday. On the way home from the bar, he threw up all the pasta and tequila he'd had onto the back seat of my car, and told me it was part of his whole party plan. FML

I agree, your life sucks 27 452

You deserved it 4 086

Stranded

By leftoutdrunk - 05/05/2012 18:12 - Canada - Edmonton

Today, I volunteered to be my brother's designated driver. I told him throughout the night that I wasn't drinking, but he ended up leaving me at the bar and going to his friend's house in a cab for more drinks, taking my keys along with him. FML

I agree, your life sucks 23 758

You deserved it 4 067

By Anonymous - 06/07/2011 11:06 - United Kingdom

Today, I was the designated driver. It was also my birthday party. FML

I agree, your life sucks 43 201

You deserved it 5 410

By gingerbread - 18/12/2017 18:00 - Armenia - Yerevan

Today, I got a little too drunk at my best friend's birthday party and threw up in the pub bathroom. I wiped everything up, composed myself, and went back to the party table before promptly throwing up on myself in front of the whole pub. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 990

You deserved it 3 710

By Anonymous - 25/08/2011 06:49 - United States

Today, I was the designated driver. On the way home with my drunk friends, they decide to give me a beer shower. I swerved, and was pulled over by a cop moments after. I was the only one arrested. FML

I agree, your life sucks 36 146

You deserved it 3 487

Gross, dude!

By Anonymous - 27/05/2010 02:30 - United States

Today, I picked up my 3 friends from a party. One of them drank too much and claimed she needed to throw up. I pulled over multiple times so she could. It didn't happen until we were right in front of her house and still inside my car. FML

I agree, your life sucks 29 411

You deserved it 3 182

ironichalibut 24

Monday 10 June 2013 9:14

At least you're all alive though, although it sounds like most will wish they weren't in the morning

GemmaStyles 14

Monday 10 June 2013 9:14

Hey on the bright side you won't be the one with the hangover in the morning

Comments

BlackPhenom 9

Monday 10 June 2013 9:26

Well whoever puked back there owes you one.

kim_larsa 5

Monday 10 June 2013 9:28

Did you take him to your house and experimented?

Zebediabolical 39

Monday 10 June 2013 9:37

I always find that I make a better impression when I'm partying along with them than being the sober dude. But that's just me.

mcrepas 19

Monday 10 June 2013 9:45

Best way to make a friend is to puke with em. Puke buddies are for life

kevinhenning 4

Monday 10 June 2013 10:06

Make them clean up there mess and take the drunk guy home ( because u can't just leave him stranded)

Fedezzer 20

Monday 10 June 2013 17:27

Isn't it kind of obvious that he couldn't take the guy home BECAUSE he didn't know where he lived? Seriously, it was implied by the way he stressed the point.

chanellgymnast 17

Monday 10 June 2013 11:00

At least you got them to their destination safely.

DjMonroe95 11

Monday 10 June 2013 11:45

Sounds like the average intro to work party lol

perdix 29

Monday 10 June 2013 12:30

When you're in a new setting, you have to get as drunk as the typical party-goer, otherwise you are a tee-totaling stick-in-the-mud. Party hearty, dude!

The_Thinker 18

Monday 10 June 2013 12:42

The lingering odour of friendship! Normally, it's flatulence, but puke isn't that far off either.

buckdharma 36

Monday 10 June 2013 12:55

Well op, at least you know where the drunk guy works. Make sure you go out for lunch with them and be sure to order the fish with the head still on, and don't drive!