Alcohol, Gross, Awkward and Love: Party zone!!

Party zone!!

By helloworld92 - 31/01/2009 20:33 - United States

Today, I hung out with my crush for only the second time at his apartment. He was having a party. After a few sips of my green apple smirnoff, I puked up the Chinese food I had eaten earlier all over his new couch in front of him and a bunch of people I didn't know. FML

I agree, your life sucks 25 273

You deserved it 8 112

Christmas: Snowy Joys and Blunders
Enjoy Christmas stories where unexpected gifts and family reunions create lasting memories... and fun! More…

Previous FML Next FML

Same thing different taste

Poor me

By Anonymous - 10/11/2019 03:00

Today, I finally kissed the guy I really love at a party. He took me outside and immediately vomited. FML

I agree, your life sucks 2 014

You deserved it 242

By manderz? - 03/08/2016 00:18 - United States - Beach Haven

Today, after having an amazing first date with my long time crush, we ended up going out to dinner. We shared a meal, and it was delicious! This would have been the ultimate dream come true... Except for the part about me throwing up in his car on the way back home. FML

I agree, your life sucks 13 488

You deserved it 1 119

Great date

By okthen - 10/12/2019 20:00 - United States - Pittsburgh

Today, I finally made a move on the guy I've been crushing on for years… by getting so drunk that I puked in his lap. FML

I agree, your life sucks 950

You deserved it 1 764

Good impressions last

By icarlypoop - 11/04/2020 23:00

Today, I threw up on my crush's lawn. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 239

You deserved it 488

Strategic

By Anonymous - 07/06/2009 13:50 - South Africa

Today, I went to a huge party. My ex boyfriend was there who I still have feelings for, so I decided to make him jealous by making out with the really drunk guy next to me. While we were making out, he threw up in my mouth and all over me. Everybody found it hysterical including my ex. FML

I agree, your life sucks 17 764

You deserved it 95 436

Worst party ever

By Dumbass - 10/01/2019 12:00

Today, I got too drunk at a party and cracked a tooth from opening a beer bottle with my teeth, farted something nasty in a room alone with someone, tried to climb a tree and fell out, and watched my crush make out with his new girl. FML

I agree, your life sucks 887

You deserved it 4 038

Dodged some bullshit

By Anonymous - 23/05/2019 14:00

Today, I went to get drinks for the first time with a guy I'd been talking to. He drank 4 drinks in the span of 30 minutes, and fell asleep at the table. I went to the bathroom before getting the check, and I came back to find he'd thrown up all over our table. Needless to say, I left without saying a word to him and deleted his number. FML

I agree, your life sucks 2 131

You deserved it 182

By Stupid Drunk - 22/12/2012 05:01 - United States

Today, I was drunk at a party and confessed my love for my crush and told her how I felt. According to my friends, I made out with another girl not long after my confession. FML

I agree, your life sucks 13 070

You deserved it 49 569

By shwasted - 22/02/2010 05:17 - United States

Today, I had one of the worst first dates of my life. After leaving the restaurant early, we went to a party to try and salvage the night. My date then got wasted, ended up puking in the back seat of my car on the way home, then lied about it. My night ended with me cleaning vomit out of my car. FML

I agree, your life sucks 27 557

You deserved it 3 797

Dating is hell

By Anonymous - 24/03/2024 05:00 - United Kingdom

Today, the girl I’ve been trying to date not only agreed to a date, she invited me back to her place because the date went so well. We were kissing so hard, I struggled to breathe, I coughed, gagged, then vomited my seafood dinner all over her yellow sofa. It all went downhill from there. FML

I agree, your life sucks 501

You deserved it 205

Slicky 0

Saturday 21 February 2009 1:37

At least aim for the floor! Dammit, it costs a lot of money to have a couch cleaned professionally. You seriously owe him like oral sex on demand for a month or something.

fuck_my_knife 0

Wednesday 4 February 2009 6:07

you need to learn to handle your drink!

Comments

happygoluckyhh 0

Monday 8 June 2009 4:55

Smooth.

samanthakay9398 0

Wednesday 10 June 2009 19:14

lightweight!!! damn.

ziqi92 0

Sunday 14 June 2009 1:14

whoa, i'm afraid i have to agree with #7. at least thats not a COMPLETELY bad thing...

blamdarot 0

Tuesday 30 June 2009 4:20

Are you pregnant? That's how a friend of mine realised she ought to take a pregnancy test. It was positive.

dontpanic_fml 32

Wednesday 1 July 2009 20:11

Damn. I am the lightest of lightweights, but totally YDI. That's ridic. Like someone said, that better have at least been vodka rather than the bitch beer.

My_averageFML 0

Sunday 23 August 2009 11:31

Wow can hold a few sips of liquor in...that's really bad you lightweight.

dubbleChic 6

Tuesday 27 October 2009 1:45

dude, im 12 and i can drink 5+ of those. they rock....and yes i did get a little drunk

sarahdarlin_x 0

Wednesday 31 March 2010 3:07

5 smirnoffs? really?? Hahaha looks like your to young to have ever heard that Smirnoff also makes a vodka, which is 40%. little kids like you trying to look all cool drinking your little alcopops, you just look like idiots. She was drinking vodka right after eating a chinese, why dont you try that, im pretty sure you'd throw up too.

snowbunnie408 11

Saturday 29 December 2012 7:53

you're 12 and drinking. I doubt you can handle that much because your body is still developing

roadie42 21

Tuesday 1 October 2013 6:06

What are Smirnoff Ices...5% each? I hope you're talking about the vodka, because bragging about drinking five of those sugar-filled things is just sad, honey =P