Perv

By niquey62307 - 08/12/2009 03:36 - United States

Spicy
Today, I found out my neighbor has been watching my husband and I have sex for the 2 years we've been married. He slaps his sausage and smokes 5 cigarettes while he watches. FML
I agree, your life sucks 24 354
You deserved it 5 783

Same thing different taste

Top comments

...five? Your husband's got mad endurance!

Is "slaps his sausage" slang for masterbating or is he ACTUALLY slapping a sausage. I personally think if he was literally slapping a sausage while watching you have sex would be so much funnier!

Comments

Thats fukn scary...but maybe u should bang with your curtains closed. YDI.

schwinn11 0

so you have a neighbor that likes to smoke and watch a little **** while he prepares his breakfast, don't we all?

perdix 29

Except for the smoking, I AM that neighbor! ;)

Oh Perdix maybe you should come move next door to me! You can watch me aaaall the tiiime ;D

suckmysarcasm 10

simple solution give him some eggs to go with his sausage. lol.

LongLuk 0

Ok 2 years, & he *still* watches??? Either you are hott, or he is into your husband.If you don't like the attention, close the blinds.. if you can't afford them, have more sex.... Daily, like every 30 minutes r so.. this will either bore the bloke, or he'll have his fill or he'll die of the smoke.. & what'll he see that he hasn't seen before??

miley_baby 0

lmao!!!! i'm sorry but the thing that made me want to comment was the "He slaps his sausage" that was like the greatest way i've ever heard someone refering to wacking off ever!!!! i now feel the need to call my boyfriend and ask him how aften he "slaps his sausage" XP damn i need a new term for female ************ someone needs to top "Flicking the bean" (from the ugly truth) like ASAP!

DanielleTheOne 3

LOL i loved that movie!! "this isnt for you, its for your bean" lol.. i once heard Tapping the Tuna Taco but that is just weird lol.

DanielleTheOne 3

or was it tickling?? either way both retarded

xxBFMVAAMIWxx 18
jbeezy23 0

Lol "slaps his sausage". He is pretty much the reason why evryone on the block moved.....

bryttanicutter 2