Work, Creepy, Make up and Intimacy: Perv

Perv

By Anonymous - 08/05/2009 14:53 - Canada

Today, while working as a makeup artist in the mall, I was approached by a man who wanted to try lipstick, which isn't unusual we do a lot of drag. While I was applying it, he started to make gross noises and, after a quick glance, I realized he had a massive erection. He then whispered, "Mmmm don't stop now." FML

I agree, your life sucks 82 751

You deserved it 4 545

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Same thing different taste

By C BOMB - 14/09/2015 23:58 - Australia - Toowong

Today, I was getting coffee when I pulled my lip balm from my pocket and started playing with it in my hands, tapping it on my face and lip. There were there two gorgeous guys in front of me who kept turning around and staring at me. I was actually holding a tampon. FML

I agree, your life sucks 17 892

You deserved it 19 360

By theunluckylifeofme - 26/06/2013 20:33 - United States - Gilroy

Today, while I was working the drive-thru, a couple came through. As I was handing back their change they began giggling. I looked down to see the man's sex-nose fully erect. FML

I agree, your life sucks 46 770

You deserved it 5 111

By Anonymos_fmler - 21/10/2014 00:38 - United States - Franklin Park

Today, I was shopping when a woman stopped me and asked me what lipgloss I was wearing because my lips looked gorgeous. I had to explain to her it was just the grease from the Slim Jim I had just eaten. FML

I agree, your life sucks 33 913

You deserved it 5 293

By Anonymous - 20/05/2009 18:34 - United States

Today, my friend and I decided to wear a new red lipstick. The guy I like turned around, looked at her and said, "Red is a really interesting, sexy color. Pretty bold. Not bad." and he smiled. I waited, smiling also, only for him frown and say, "Your teeth are REALLY yellow." FML

I agree, your life sucks 50 074

You deserved it 17 587

By creepedouthostess - 17/06/2009 07:12 - United States

Today, while working in a restaurant, I took an elderly man to his table under a red colored lamp. He asked me if this was "the red light district." I thought he was just kidding until when I was placing down the menus he leaned in and whispered creepily in my ear, "You know, you're really sexy." FML

I agree, your life sucks 43 470

You deserved it 3 126

By forever damaged - 21/12/2015 04:24 - United States - Wallkill

Today, while I was working at a gas station, a man came up to the register with his zipper undone and his penis hanging out in full view. I had to awkwardly hand him his change while trying not to look or make eye contact. FML

I agree, your life sucks 21 707

You deserved it 1 652

By sammy18f - 24/02/2015 03:46 - United States - Brentwood

Today, a man asked me for directions outside of a local store. After about five minutes into the conversation, I noticed he had whipped his penis out and was stroking it. He then asked me if I liked what I saw. FML

I agree, your life sucks 43 113

You deserved it 3 784

By Mayabie - 16/10/2011 21:08 - France

Today, at my job in a cosmetics department, I was helping a customer find something to her taste. She said, "I want a lipstick like yours. Something that says, 'I'm a bitch'." FML

I agree, your life sucks 35 199

You deserved it 6 402

By Job Seeking - 22/01/2013 11:14 - Australia - Melbourne

Today, I was cleaning at work when an elderly gentleman walked towards me, paused, and with a wink said, "That's what I like to see: a girl on her knees." This is the same workplace where another old man informed me that my yellow uniform made me look like a "suggestive cheesecake." FML

I agree, your life sucks 35 145

You deserved it 3 005

Delusional

By why - 06/11/2020 23:01

Today, I was at work. I had a male patient expose himself to me. He then apologized and said he thought that's what I wanted. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 185

You deserved it 112

penguinz 0

Friday 8 May 2009 20:12

danggg sooo gross

maedoc 0

Friday 8 May 2009 21:11

well did you finish him off at least?

Comments

msvivianli 0

Friday 15 May 2009 11:29

transvestite -____-X

ekoorb97 0

Sunday 17 May 2009 19:42

anything with a drag always ends up in a hilarious story

Truffles 0

Tuesday 19 May 2009 3:12

#31 you know, I was thinking the exact same thing actually

bsaucedo 0

Wednesday 20 May 2009 2:14

creeper mccreeperson

concrete 0

Sunday 24 May 2009 22:40

OMG nasty!

Luv4pink1721 0

Friday 29 May 2009 20:04

OMG lol I would have freaked out and ran away to call mall security thats SOOOO WEIRD

prostar 0

Saturday 6 June 2009 3:56

I woulndnt have done it if I knew you use fml :)

_Noon_ 0

Wednesday 8 July 2009 9:27

Eww, gross.

thesmartaleck 0

Saturday 11 July 2009 11:32

I do hope they pay you enough

jnmommy 0

Thursday 30 July 2009 20:02

AWWWWWKWARD!!! Hilarious though. LOL

Keywords

Miscellaneous Awkward Shopping Stressed out Work Mental health Health Gross Family Love AITA Am I overreacting? Weddings Phone calls Embarrassing Relatable Shoes Pranks Farts Kids Cute Birthday Parents Argument Keys Neighbours Wanker Intimacy Students Coworkers

The Top

Today, I was sleeping because I had been sick. The closest bathroom to mine is the one in my parents room. I wake up and feel like I have to throw up, I run into my parents room to go to the bathroom. I walk in on my parents having sex. Shocked, I gasp for air then throw up all over their bed. FML

I agree, your life sucks 122 467

You deserved it 13 416

Today, I was supposed to start my exciting new job. I knew I needed a good night's sleep to prepare but because of the excitement I was worried, so I decided to try that tart cherry juice I kept seeing on TikTok to help me sleep. It worked. A little too well. I woke up 14 hours later, missed my first day, got fired. FML

I agree, your life sucks 174

You deserved it 538

The Top

Today, I was so tired that I thought the item I'd ordered a few months ago had been delivered then stolen, so I emailed the company about it. When I checked back on the website, I realized it hadn't actually been delivered yet and I read the invoice wrong. FML

I agree, your life sucks 571

You deserved it 490

Today, I learned that even when you put a sock on the door because you are having sex with your boyfriend, it doesn't mean your mom won't walk into your brand new apartment for a "surprise visit." FML

I agree, your life sucks 42 440

You deserved it 10 515

Today, I had to resign from my job because I tested positive for drugs. I've never taken drugs. FML

I agree, your life sucks 3 932

You deserved it 259

Today, after years of pain and swelling in my foot from what I thought was chronic ankle sprains, I found out I have a broken bone in my foot. I have no clue how long it's been broken. FML

I agree, your life sucks 4 501

You deserved it 884

Today, I took the bus to work. I was exhausted and had a big mug of coffee. Half asleep and thinking I was in my car, I reached forward to put it in the "cup holder" during the ride. When I let go, I poured hot coffee not only all over myself, but also on the large, angry-looking man next to me. FML

I agree, your life sucks 10 356

You deserved it 29 095

Today, I got dressed in a hurry and grabbed what I though was a basic white shirt from the clean laundry pile. It wasn’t until I stepped into the elevator at work and saw myself in the mirror that I realized I was wearing one of my girlfriend’s shirt. It was snug, had a floral pattern, and made me look like I was trying too hard to be trendy. It was a long day. FML

I agree, your life sucks 105

You deserved it 515

Perv

Same thing different taste

Delusional

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