Work, Creepy, Make up and Intimacy: Perv

Perv

By Anonymous - 08/05/2009 14:53 - Canada

Today, while working as a makeup artist in the mall, I was approached by a man who wanted to try lipstick, which isn't unusual we do a lot of drag. While I was applying it, he started to make gross noises and, after a quick glance, I realized he had a massive erection. He then whispered, "Mmmm don't stop now." FML

I agree, your life sucks 82 751

You deserved it 4 545

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Same thing different taste

By C BOMB - 14/09/2015 23:58 - Australia - Toowong

Today, I was getting coffee when I pulled my lip balm from my pocket and started playing with it in my hands, tapping it on my face and lip. There were there two gorgeous guys in front of me who kept turning around and staring at me. I was actually holding a tampon. FML

I agree, your life sucks 17 892

You deserved it 19 360

By theunluckylifeofme - 26/06/2013 20:33 - United States - Gilroy

Today, while I was working the drive-thru, a couple came through. As I was handing back their change they began giggling. I looked down to see the man's sex-nose fully erect. FML

I agree, your life sucks 46 770

You deserved it 5 111

By Anonymos_fmler - 21/10/2014 00:38 - United States - Franklin Park

Today, I was shopping when a woman stopped me and asked me what lipgloss I was wearing because my lips looked gorgeous. I had to explain to her it was just the grease from the Slim Jim I had just eaten. FML

I agree, your life sucks 33 913

You deserved it 5 293

By Anonymous - 20/05/2009 18:34 - United States

Today, my friend and I decided to wear a new red lipstick. The guy I like turned around, looked at her and said, "Red is a really interesting, sexy color. Pretty bold. Not bad." and he smiled. I waited, smiling also, only for him frown and say, "Your teeth are REALLY yellow." FML

I agree, your life sucks 50 074

You deserved it 17 587

By creepedouthostess - 17/06/2009 07:12 - United States

Today, while working in a restaurant, I took an elderly man to his table under a red colored lamp. He asked me if this was "the red light district." I thought he was just kidding until when I was placing down the menus he leaned in and whispered creepily in my ear, "You know, you're really sexy." FML

I agree, your life sucks 43 470

You deserved it 3 126

By forever damaged - 21/12/2015 04:24 - United States - Wallkill

Today, while I was working at a gas station, a man came up to the register with his zipper undone and his penis hanging out in full view. I had to awkwardly hand him his change while trying not to look or make eye contact. FML

I agree, your life sucks 21 707

You deserved it 1 652

By sammy18f - 24/02/2015 03:46 - United States - Brentwood

Today, a man asked me for directions outside of a local store. After about five minutes into the conversation, I noticed he had whipped his penis out and was stroking it. He then asked me if I liked what I saw. FML

I agree, your life sucks 43 113

You deserved it 3 784

By Mayabie - 16/10/2011 21:08 - France

Today, at my job in a cosmetics department, I was helping a customer find something to her taste. She said, "I want a lipstick like yours. Something that says, 'I'm a bitch'." FML

I agree, your life sucks 35 199

You deserved it 6 402

By Job Seeking - 22/01/2013 11:14 - Australia - Melbourne

Today, I was cleaning at work when an elderly gentleman walked towards me, paused, and with a wink said, "That's what I like to see: a girl on her knees." This is the same workplace where another old man informed me that my yellow uniform made me look like a "suggestive cheesecake." FML

I agree, your life sucks 35 145

You deserved it 3 005

Delusional

By why - 06/11/2020 23:01

Today, I was at work. I had a male patient expose himself to me. He then apologized and said he thought that's what I wanted. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 185

You deserved it 112

penguinz 0

Friday 8 May 2009 20:12

danggg sooo gross

maedoc 0

Friday 8 May 2009 21:11

well did you finish him off at least?

Comments

Blardo 0

Friday 8 May 2009 21:51

As she was putting lipstick on me, I JIZZED IN MY PANTS.

Chubtubdaplaya 0

Friday 8 May 2009 21:52

This FML is glorious!

Weil 0

Friday 8 May 2009 21:54

Who the **** gets turned on by getting lipstick put on them? I guess you're super hot.

showwstopper 0

Friday 8 May 2009 21:56

THATS NOT WERID !!!!

xxjoexx 0

Friday 8 May 2009 21:56

Normally i would make some perverted and humorous comment, but this one is just disturbing

hahaha6 0

Friday 8 May 2009 21:57

Yeaaaaaaaaaah.... um, creepy!

Sweetcheeks 0

Friday 8 May 2009 21:58

Ahh, that must of been terribly uncomfortable ;D

featherhead 0

Friday 8 May 2009 21:58

ahw, that must've been awful.

Bryan_Z 0

Friday 8 May 2009 21:58

the whole ****** thing is creepy

life_is_life 0

Friday 8 May 2009 22:01

eww FYL :S u should have kicked him in the balls lol

Keywords

Miscellaneous Shopping Awkward Work Mental health Stressed out Health Gross AITA Am I overreacting? Love Family Weddings Phone calls Embarrassing Relatable Shoes Pranks Farts Cute Kids Parents Birthday Argument Keys Neighbours Students Wanker Intimacy Coworkers

The Top

Today, I came to realize that dating as an overweight girl sucks. I can’t get a guy to commit/stay to save my life. I go on dating apps, and when we exchange photos or meet in person they abandon me. I know that this will change if I lose weight, but is it wrong for me to want to be loved for who I am? FML

I agree, your life sucks 433

You deserved it 576

Today, I ate 30 chocolate pocket brownies, two caramel chocolates, two Budweisers. All of that while on my breaks at work. I'm a guy and I'm worried about getting diabetes while i'm actually craving more chocolate and sugar treats, my body is getting weaker, I'm getting dumber, fatter, and slower as we speak. FML

I agree, your life sucks 285

You deserved it 1 189

The Top

Today, I tried whitening my teeth with an off-brand product. It didn't whiten my teeth, but it did burn parts of my gums off. FML

I agree, your life sucks 25 312

You deserved it 7 696

Today, while making my son lunch, he pooped, took off his diaper, stepped in it, and then climbed to the gate to call for me. When I arrived, he had a big smile on his face and exclaimed, "Look!" Shit footprints were everywhere. FML

I agree, your life sucks 34 353

You deserved it 4 802

Today, I was happy about finally having the time to pot up the $50 worth of reblooming iris's I bought. Until I went into the garage and couldn't find them. My husband cleaned up and threw them in the garbage. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 996

You deserved it 280

Today, I discovered my neighbors have bought a karaoke machine. FML

I agree, your life sucks 33 467

You deserved it 4 085

Today, my grandmother made a rule that every time we take a crap, she has to examine the turds to make sure they aren't big enough to clog up the pipes. I don't know what's worse: that she looks at my turds, or the fact that she actively comments on them. FML

I agree, your life sucks 49 272

You deserved it 3 615

Today, at the age of 22, I started eating my boogers. FML

I agree, your life sucks 7 571

You deserved it 49 374

Perv

Same thing different taste

Delusional

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