App
FML for mobile
Free
Open in app

Pull yourself together, man!

By NotTheMomma - 22/07/2016 14:06

Spicy
Today, I've stopped smoking, lost 30 pounds, taken several painful tests, and checked my ovulation daily in an effort to get pregnant. My husband has only had one task during the entire process, and after hours of gaming, he says he's just too tired to have sex. FML
I agree, your life sucks 18 711
You deserved it 1 947

Same thing different taste

Top comments

Sorry OP. Those are awesome achievements and they say a lot about your character and devotion. Hopefully you will be a mother soon! Good luck with your husband!

Some people do change after having a kid, that's true. However, quite a few don't, and to put a child in a potentially less than desirable situation with an uninvolved, uncaring father, that's just very unfair to the kid.

Comments

You lost thirty pounds in a day?! That's quite a feat!

Maybe he isn't ready to have kids and you doing all that might make him more nervous. You should talk to him and try to know what he's thinking and feeling. Maybe he wants to have kids later on or maybe not at all. This is a decision made by two, so make sure you both want it.

Wow, you try so hard with no appreciation... I would never do that if my partner cared that much!

I did not mean to click, "You deserve it." I'm sorry and that sucks, OP.

Marital rape is a horrible thing to go thru. Not only is it a bad experience, but you still have to live a life with and around them daily. Trust me, it's a nightmare long after the painful and emotionally traumatic occurrence.

In reply to absolutely everyone above: Let's play a little game. I like to call it "Genderswap". You take your arguments/comments/statements/etc. and swap each word that refers to a gender, so that it refers to the opposite one. Does the comment make you feel any differently? If so, congratulations! You're an ass! Jesus ******* Christ, people! We don't know how many times he refused, we don't know whether he knew that this was what she was doing, we don't know whether they agreed on a kid at all! I do know that there'd be more people bashing OP if she were a man trying to get a woman to have sex. That's not to say that she deserved it, because putting all that work in only to have it be for naught is awful. I just have an issue with the number of people bashing OP's husband for not being a tireless sex machine.

Wow. Another person who read the fml and can't understand it. As far as your game I'm not the only one here who considered both genders. OP stated that her husband had only one task during the entire process but he uses the too tired to have sex excuse to avoid getting OP pregnant. It wasn't just one night. Any couple wanting a child would be lucky to accomplish a pregnancy on their first time, it doesn't always work that way for every couple. Tireless sex machine, more like tireless gamer. Don't just read the fml, analyze what it says. All of it. And for anyone supporting the husband with reasons of not being ready or not wanting children, his behavior is very immature.

You realize that not everyone has the same way of talking. Also she could have been doing all those things and this was the first time she's ovulated when she felt comfortable to begin trying to get pregnant. Which would mean he has said no exactly one times. You are doing exactly what you're criticising others for and assuming based on the limited information.

Again. What is your understanding of a process. You like many people here read the fml but don't analyze all of what is said. You actually think one night or one time of sex will guarantee that OP will get pregnant? It is a process, meaning OP has asked her husband more than once to have sex but the husband is too tired from gaming for so many hours. That's the husbands reason or excuse to not have sex with his wife. That's the situation going on. As for whatever reasons or fears the husband may have is not what is being questioned here. It's his behavior during this process. But you probably don't understand that. You're thinking this is just sex to satisfy OP, no. OP is trying to get pregnant, she can't do it on her own.

Repeating yourself continuously does not make you correct. OP said that she is ovulating and her husband said he was too tired after gaming all day. I'm not sure how you decided or came to the conclusion that it went the same every time that she ovulated. Or like I stated this could easily have been her first attempt since she decided that she wants to be pregnant. Perhaps she wasn't ready until after all the testing and quitting smoking and losing weight. I'm aware that she used the word process. Processes have a beginning and this could have been that beginning. Nothing OP or anyone else has said says any of us think you only have to have sex one time to get pregnant. We're all also well aware that she's wanting to have sex to get pregnant and it's not about satisfaction. Telling other people what they think and putting words in their mouths does not mean that you have reading comprehension. If you are going to make things up you don't have to reply to every post with it.

Sorry to be that person, but maybe he just isn't there yet. Maybe he needs to catch up maturity-wise before you guys start a family. He doesn't exactly sound responsible or like he has adulting down yet.

maybe instead of writing here, you should talk to ypur husband and work things out ?

Congrats on all of that. Sometimes when trying to get pregnant and having your sex life revolve around that and scheduling it can make a man feel like he's just a walking spermbank. It can also be very stressful for him as well seeing how much you've gone through and how much getting pregnant means to you. In his mind he has to succeed and if he doesn't then you'll be unhappy and disappointed in him. So instead of risking being a failure (which is how he would see himself) he could be opting just not to try in the first place. That's one of many possibilities of course but the only way you'll know what's going on with him is communicating. To everyone that is saying he is an immature asshole because he was gaming you're being ridiculous. Plenty of adults are gamers. That doesn't make you not an adult.