Kids: Running gag

Running gag

By TheJoker - 12/05/2009 05:25 - United States

Today, I was jogging in my neighborhood when I saw a kid's ball roll over to where I was jogging. I stopped, grabbed the ball for the kid and went to hand it to him. He then yelled, "Stranger danger!" and his parents came sprinting out. I had to explain the story to the police for 30 minutes. FML

I agree, your life sucks 62 816

You deserved it 3 204

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Same thing different taste

By imnotastranger - 09/05/2014 03:01

Today, I was teaching my 4 year-old daughter about "stranger danger" and how to deal with it. Later that day, we went out and since I didn't buy her a ice cream, she kept screaming "STRANGER DANGER!" A total stranger tackled me until the cops arrived. FML

I agree, your life sucks 52 621

You deserved it 6 932

By bet a woman would've been thanked - 07/05/2013 20:21 - United Kingdom - Redditch

Today, I was out jogging, when I saw a girl fall off her bike and start crying. I ran over to see if she was hurt. Apparently her neighbour thought I was trying to kidnap her, because he ran out with a baseball bat and threatened to beat me to death if I didn't get lost. FML

I agree, your life sucks 51 122

You deserved it 3 111

The Child Catcher

By Not a child hater - 30/10/2024 18:00 - United States

Today, I had to chase down and tackle a boy (around 11 or 12) at my workplace after I caught him snatching someone's wallet and trying to quickly sneak out with it. Now everyone thinks I have something against children, even after I returned the stranger's wallet and explained that the little brat is a thief. FML

I agree, your life sucks 501

You deserved it 65

By Anonymous - 31/08/2011 17:06 - Canada

Today, I noticed a young child wandering out onto a busy street. I managed to grab his arm just as he stepped off the sidewalk and yank him away from almost certain death. My reward was his mother, who was on her cell phone the whole time, screaming at me for touching her child. FML

I agree, your life sucks 38 211

You deserved it 2 528

By bcoper - 25/06/2012 16:09 - Switzerland - Luzern

Today, my neighborhood had its annual summer barbecue, and I ended up showing a little boy who lives down the street how to hit a baseball. When I gave him back his bat so he could try for himself, he swung it into my shin and yelled, "Tag! You're it!" FML

I agree, your life sucks 25 273

You deserved it 2 632

By Anonymous - 07/11/2010 11:14 - Netherlands

Today, I was jogging, and I saw a little boy walking. Crying and all alone. Thinking that he was probably lost, I asked to him with my sweetest voice: 'Hi there, did you lose somebody?' He screamed terrified and ran away. This is the second time this has happened to me. FML

I agree, your life sucks 29 645

You deserved it 5 786

Freaked

By paranoid - 06/06/2009 04:43 - United States

Today, I was walking on a path through a park by myself. I glanced at the ground and saw a shadow behind me. Thinking of an attacker, I screamed as loud as I could and began flailing my arms to ward him off. Turns out, it was a jogger. He had to stop due to his uncontrollable laughter. FML

I agree, your life sucks 14 690

You deserved it 55 064

By Anonymous - 26/10/2011 07:41 - United States

Today, as I was driving to work, I witnessed a kid apparently getting jumped. Being a good citizen, I got out and started yelling at them. I ended up alongside the kid in the hospital. FML

I agree, your life sucks 39 880

You deserved it 4 631

By foreveryoung - 30/04/2016 16:23 - France

Today, a weird guy approached me and started asking me many questions. I didn't know how to get out of this situation, so I suddenly ran away shouting, "Stranger danger! " I'm 21. FML

I agree, your life sucks 13 928

You deserved it 3 296

Free kick

By steph - 01/06/2009 04:50 - Canada

Today, I was in the park for a walk when a ball rolled to my feet. Figuring it belonged to the kids not far off, I wound back and kicked. The ball had actually been kicked by someone else for their dog to chase and I ended up punting it in the head. FML

I agree, your life sucks 16 337

You deserved it 38 278

ForestFire0 1

Tuesday 12 May 2009 12:12

Well, he's safe at least. What a brat. I blame the parents for giving him fear without intelligence.

immafiremylaser 0

Tuesday 12 May 2009 12:12

That's what you get for being a considerate person.

Comments

AlienMind 0

Tuesday 12 May 2009 14:41

No point helping anyone these days... Either you get sued or you go to jail. Or both.

phillynena 0

Tuesday 12 May 2009 14:51

LMAO! im seriously picturing a lil kid having a tantrum and yelling @ the top of their lungs: "STRANGER DANGER! STRANGER DANGER.....(I NEED AN ADULT)!"

CPTobvious_fml 0

Tuesday 12 May 2009 14:55

well it's a bit weird when you are "jogging" around his block, and asking him if he wants candy from your unmarked white van... then again... you probably look like a child molestor

ohhboyy 0

Tuesday 12 May 2009 14:56

lmao can you imagine a little kid running in circles screaming STRAYUNGA DAYUNGA! OH MAH GAD

Always4tehlolz 0

Tuesday 12 May 2009 14:59

You should never talk to strangers. Unless you want to meet anyone . . . Ever . . .

whomajigi 0

Tuesday 12 May 2009 15:02

You did the right thing. I hate FMLs where someone doing the right thing gets f-ed over for it. :( I also hate the child coddling society we live in where everyone is out to get your child or hurt them.

Ici_fml 0

Tuesday 12 May 2009 15:18

FYL for the police bit because that was unnecessary. The parents should have come when they heard their kid, and you could have explained yourself in 5 minutes, then done. But YDI because you picked it up, and was putting the kid in a situation where they'd have to be in grabbing distance to get it. The world is full of sickos, I think the kid should be wary. Next time, if your jogging, just leave it,or if you are stationary, kick it closer to him.

genius_man16 0

Tuesday 12 May 2009 15:25

No good deed goes unpunished FYL for sure tho I'm guessing #19 is one of the kids parents

CodeMonkey123 0

Tuesday 12 May 2009 15:39

Well if you didn't talk to strangers you wouldn't have any friends and wouldn't even be able to talk to your parents. These parents are teaching this child that all people are bad which is a wrong thing to think that will get you no where in life. In 30yrs this kid will being living with his mummy with no friends at all.....

pltcllyincorrect 0

Tuesday 12 May 2009 15:40

I understand kids need to be wary... but seriously?? I think kids need a realistic view of the world, not too niave but not paranoia-central. I just imagine this big white house with unnaturally green grass. And then there's this fat kid with Crew Cuts (little Jcrew) on, and he starts screaming in this anal voice "DANGER STRANGER! DANGER STRANGER!" And in 5 seconds a stay-at-home mom who is stuffed with Botox comes running out with her golf-loving husband who has a wig on. Then they start freaking out, and the dad is calling 911 on his iPhone and the mom is crying and hugging her kid, whilst they both yell at you ferociously. HAHHAHAHH FYL!!!!!