Kids: Running gag

Running gag

By TheJoker - 12/05/2009 05:25 - United States

Today, I was jogging in my neighborhood when I saw a kid's ball roll over to where I was jogging. I stopped, grabbed the ball for the kid and went to hand it to him. He then yelled, "Stranger danger!" and his parents came sprinting out. I had to explain the story to the police for 30 minutes. FML

I agree, your life sucks 62 816

You deserved it 3 204

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Same thing different taste

By imnotastranger - 09/05/2014 03:01

Today, I was teaching my 4 year-old daughter about "stranger danger" and how to deal with it. Later that day, we went out and since I didn't buy her a ice cream, she kept screaming "STRANGER DANGER!" A total stranger tackled me until the cops arrived. FML

I agree, your life sucks 52 621

You deserved it 6 932

By bet a woman would've been thanked - 07/05/2013 20:21 - United Kingdom - Redditch

Today, I was out jogging, when I saw a girl fall off her bike and start crying. I ran over to see if she was hurt. Apparently her neighbour thought I was trying to kidnap her, because he ran out with a baseball bat and threatened to beat me to death if I didn't get lost. FML

I agree, your life sucks 51 122

You deserved it 3 111

The Child Catcher

By Not a child hater - 30/10/2024 18:00 - United States

Today, I had to chase down and tackle a boy (around 11 or 12) at my workplace after I caught him snatching someone's wallet and trying to quickly sneak out with it. Now everyone thinks I have something against children, even after I returned the stranger's wallet and explained that the little brat is a thief. FML

I agree, your life sucks 501

You deserved it 65

By Anonymous - 31/08/2011 17:06 - Canada

Today, I noticed a young child wandering out onto a busy street. I managed to grab his arm just as he stepped off the sidewalk and yank him away from almost certain death. My reward was his mother, who was on her cell phone the whole time, screaming at me for touching her child. FML

I agree, your life sucks 38 211

You deserved it 2 528

By bcoper - 25/06/2012 16:09 - Switzerland - Luzern

Today, my neighborhood had its annual summer barbecue, and I ended up showing a little boy who lives down the street how to hit a baseball. When I gave him back his bat so he could try for himself, he swung it into my shin and yelled, "Tag! You're it!" FML

I agree, your life sucks 25 273

You deserved it 2 632

By Anonymous - 07/11/2010 11:14 - Netherlands

Today, I was jogging, and I saw a little boy walking. Crying and all alone. Thinking that he was probably lost, I asked to him with my sweetest voice: 'Hi there, did you lose somebody?' He screamed terrified and ran away. This is the second time this has happened to me. FML

I agree, your life sucks 29 645

You deserved it 5 786

Freaked

By paranoid - 06/06/2009 04:43 - United States

Today, I was walking on a path through a park by myself. I glanced at the ground and saw a shadow behind me. Thinking of an attacker, I screamed as loud as I could and began flailing my arms to ward him off. Turns out, it was a jogger. He had to stop due to his uncontrollable laughter. FML

I agree, your life sucks 14 690

You deserved it 55 064

By Anonymous - 26/10/2011 07:41 - United States

Today, as I was driving to work, I witnessed a kid apparently getting jumped. Being a good citizen, I got out and started yelling at them. I ended up alongside the kid in the hospital. FML

I agree, your life sucks 39 880

You deserved it 4 631

By foreveryoung - 30/04/2016 16:23 - France

Today, a weird guy approached me and started asking me many questions. I didn't know how to get out of this situation, so I suddenly ran away shouting, "Stranger danger! " I'm 21. FML

I agree, your life sucks 13 928

You deserved it 3 296

Free kick

By steph - 01/06/2009 04:50 - Canada

Today, I was in the park for a walk when a ball rolled to my feet. Figuring it belonged to the kids not far off, I wound back and kicked. The ball had actually been kicked by someone else for their dog to chase and I ended up punting it in the head. FML

I agree, your life sucks 16 337

You deserved it 38 278

ForestFire0 1

Tuesday 12 May 2009 12:12

Well, he's safe at least. What a brat. I blame the parents for giving him fear without intelligence.

immafiremylaser 0

Tuesday 12 May 2009 12:12

That's what you get for being a considerate person.

Comments

husk3rfan9287 0

Tuesday 12 May 2009 18:01

******* idiots don't realize that almost every time a child is abducted it's by someone the family knows personally

UsingLogic 0

Tuesday 12 May 2009 18:05

How ironic. Yes, the parents are over-reacting by thinking there are child molesters everywhere, but you guys are over-reacting by thinking idiot parents like them are all over the place.

husk3rfan9287 0

Tuesday 12 May 2009 18:10

#64, there are, these parents are in the same group as those idiots who dont want to keep score in sports games

Heidi_fml 0

Tuesday 12 May 2009 18:17

My faith in humanity has considerably lessened... Not everyone is a rapist or a molester. Good god, people can't do shit these days without some nutjobs calling the cops or overreacting. Kidnapping statistics have gone down, while obesity ones go up. Let your kids go outside by themselves, for crying out loud.

rjsduddle 0

Friday 26 February 2010 15:54

Clearly, fat kids are harder to kidnap.

klucca 0

Tuesday 12 May 2009 18:18

That's whats wrong with the world today...no one believes people can be normal!

thelonelylurker 0

Tuesday 12 May 2009 18:26

Lol, stupid ass parents probably taught their kid to do that. Stranger Danger! Lol, still laughing.

exile529 0

Tuesday 12 May 2009 18:35

hahah, "Stranger Danger" classic.

Caidoz_fml 0

Tuesday 12 May 2009 18:39

And you didn't keep running.......why? God kids are dumb these days.

that_guy01 0

Tuesday 12 May 2009 18:41

i hate overprotective paranoid parents

liquidpaper 0

Tuesday 12 May 2009 18:41

The kid calling stranger danger on you was understandable. But the parents calling the cops? Man... parents these days. Interacting with strangers is something everyone has to do eventually. Kids won't be getting a good start on that if they grow up believing everyone is out to harm them.