Work: Sir! Sir! - FML

Sir! Sir!

By Anonymous - 28/05/2009 16:52 - United States

Spicy

Today, I was taking calls at the helpdesk I work at. The caller was a man, and while helping him with his issue he suddenly stopped to tell me I had a nice soothing voice. Then he told me to say something else. As I continued to help him, he started making moaning noises. I'm a guy. FML

I agree, your life sucks 57 346

You deserved it 3 532

Summer: Sun, Sea and Blunders
Summer anecdotes where the sun shines... and blunders are never far away! More…

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Same thing different taste

By long day - 12/11/2013 20:29 - United States - Bay City

Spicy

Today, while taking an order over the phone for the customer at work, I began to hear slight moans. The moans gradually became faster and louder, until climax was achieved and I realized I was being used for phone sex. FML

I agree, your life sucks 47 740

You deserved it 3 881

By Milly - 30/01/2011 19:25 - United Kingdom

Spicy

Today, I was trying to help a very slow-witted client over the phone. After a while, I realised he was just delaying while pleasuring himself to the sound of my voice. FML

I agree, your life sucks 38 617

You deserved it 4 083

Great customer service, thanks!

By Eli Maldonado - 29/05/2021 17:01

Today, I called customer service for my phone. We talked for a while and the man was very nice to me. Too nice. Right before hanging up, he said, “Have a good day ma’am!” He was flirting the whole time and I didn’t realize it, and he didn’t that I’m a guy. FML

I agree, your life sucks 876

You deserved it 147

By automaticfail_00 - 17/06/2009 23:27 - United States

Spicy

Today, I was on the phone with my best friend who lives out of town. He was strangely quiet. Later that day I asked him why he didn't talk much. He admitted he was jacking off to the sound of my voice. FML

I agree, your life sucks 58 089

You deserved it 5 059

By Anonymous - 17/03/2018 05:00

Today, while working at my dead-end call centre job that couldn't get any worse, I answered a call from a customer who was having loud sex. I still needed to sound professional and tell her when a product was released. FML

I agree, your life sucks 4 692

You deserved it 421

By Anonymous - 16/05/2012 20:34 - Netherlands - Kerkrade

Today, I called my boyfriend during his lunch break. He started to place his order at a fast food joint, and trying to be funny, I started moaning sexily after each part of his order. I eventually realised I was on speaker when I heard snickering in the background. FML

I agree, your life sucks 7 737

You deserved it 32 277

Revealing

By kitkat545 - 15/06/2009 23:18 - United States

Spicy

Today, my husband called me from work just to chat. He asked what I had been up to today. I was feeling frisky so I told him all about how I had gotten horny, watched a porno and masturbated earlier. It wasn't until I heard the hoots and laughter that I realized he had me on speakerphone. FML

I agree, your life sucks 30 068

You deserved it 50 981

Hush

By sXeQueen - 13/03/2010 15:17 - United States

Today, my boyfriend was having a really bad day, so I decided to call him and try to calm him down. At one point, I thought it would be sweet to sing him a song since he claimed to love my voice. Before I could get half way through, he told me to shut up because I was getting on his nerves and just making things worse. FML

I agree, your life sucks 13 295

You deserved it 31 045

By Anonymous - 30/05/2009 14:19 - Australia

Spicy

Today, I was having amazing sex with this guy I had been seeing for a while. It got really intense, so did my moans. Guys usually like when I moan, but he just put his hands over my mouth and told me to "shut up" because it sounded like "pig noises". FML

I agree, your life sucks 62 300

You deserved it 21 488

So hott

By facepalm - 27/02/2009 08:39 - Singapore

Spicy

Today, I was having phone sex with my boyfriend. About halfway through he went really quiet and started breathing heavily. I thought he was about to climax until I discovered he had fallen asleep. FML

I agree, your life sucks 66 743

You deserved it 15 166

Next

Top comments

sheila_babeela 0

Thursday 28 May 2009 20:06

aw man, poor you! hahaha! but atleast he'll probably give you a good review!

irishfever 0

Thursday 28 May 2009 20:10

haha maybe you should consider getting a job at one of those phone sex lines ;)

Comments

sweetcamel 0

Friday 16 April 2010 23:21

call me ;) LMAO

chicko_fml 0

Wednesday 25 August 2010 22:30

stop lying ur were prolly playn wit urself while he was moaning ******

hulababyrock 0

Sunday 6 February 2011 22:56

dude!!! that's ****** up!!!

Carlie_McCartney 1

Friday 5 August 2011 19:01

Hahahaha that's too funny xD did you end up telling him?

AllyC1023 4

Friday 27 January 2012 8:50

Awkward.

MadisonDerp 16

Friday 19 July 2013 8:14

Oh God! There's crazy people involved with all jobs, OP, sorry he had to be a perv.

PsychoAlexLying 4

Friday 7 March 2014 7:46

Did the guy sound like ken kaniff

4EverMarie 24

Saturday 3 May 2014 1:44

Maybe he's gay?

carbonbasedcynic 17

Monday 12 May 2014 6:25

wrong number

fharrison 3

Sunday 1 June 2014 13:02

Fuuuuck

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The Top

Today, I agreed to go to a restaurant because I hadn’t really been listening and thought everyone was planning a coworkers night out. It wasn’t until the guy who had invited me turned up at the restaurant in a suit that I realised it wasn’t a group event, I’d accidentally agreed to a date. FML

I agree, your life sucks 191

You deserved it 1 061

Today, I asked my husband to try a little foreplay for once, instead of just rushing into sex. His idea of foreplay was to sweetly whisper that he was going to "penis" me so hard. That's the first time I've heard the word "penis" used as a verb, and hopefully the last. FML

I agree, your life sucks 56 063

You deserved it 7 255

The Top

Today, I went to the gym. I tried out a new machine where you do one-arm weightlifting. I took my time to get into a good position, then set the machine to the lowest weight possible. I couldn't even lift it an inch. A bunch of buff guys nearby saw me and burst out laughing. FML

I agree, your life sucks 43 708

You deserved it 5 946

Today, I got fired from my job as a babysitter because the movie I showed the kids was "too violent and gave them nightmares." What movie was it? Mary Poppins. FML

I agree, your life sucks 973

You deserved it 91

Today, my ex-girlfriend from high school has been at her new college for a week. She broke up with me because she wanted to meet new people and leave high school behind her. That was understandable… until my best friend showed me texts from her trying to arrange to hook up with him when she’s back. FML

I agree, your life sucks 712

You deserved it 98

Today, I woke up earlier to food prep for lunch later. Just as I was preparing the ingredients, I dropped a thick glass saucer on the kitchen counter and it shattered like a hail storm - everywhere in the kitchen. I ended up spending more time cleaning it out and obviously logged in to work later than usual. FML

I agree, your life sucks 397

You deserved it 114

Today, I logged onto Facebook and found out that my own mother unfriended me because she didn't want her new boyfriend to know that she had a daughter. FML

I agree, your life sucks 42 985

You deserved it 3 014

Today, I called up my ex girlfriend to ask her if I could come round hers to get my pyjamas back. She replied: "I'm keeping them just in case..." - "In case of what?" - "In case I want to dress up like an asshole". FML

I agree, your life sucks 11 531

You deserved it 28 950