Sexism and Intimacy: Stop perving

Stop perving

By Anonymous - 14/01/2011 04:30 - Ireland

Today, I had to repeat my order in Starbucks three times because the barista was staring at my chest. FML

I agree, your life sucks 29 571

You deserved it 12 431

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Same thing different taste

It's not what you think

By lifedoessuck12 - 19/07/2009 14:13 - Philippines

Today, I had to wait outside Starbucks. While standing, I started daydreaming and didn't notice I had been staring at a table beside the window for a long time. Suddenly, someone came up to me and said, "Try not to be so obvious." Sitting at the table was a girl with a huge cleavage. FML

I agree, your life sucks 42 906

You deserved it 11 786

Creepypasta

By Anonymous - 09/03/2013 06:06 - United States

Today, while I was working at Starbucks, a man came in and placed his order. I made his drink, topped it with whipped cream, and put the lid on. Some cream was seeping out of the top. He looked at me and said, "Good… you left a nipple." and slowly licked it off. FML

I agree, your life sucks 34 690

You deserved it 3 678

Fight or flight

By Jeffery89000 - 14/09/2024 14:00 - Canada - Toronto

Today, I went to my favorite coffee shop, ordered my usual, smiled at the barista I have a crush on, and confidently said, "You too!" when they told me to enjoy my drink. I have to find a new coffee shop. FML

I agree, your life sucks 144

You deserved it 323

Morning joe

By Christine.T - 27/08/2024 06:00 - United States - Boston

Today, I stopped at the coffee shop before work and confidently ordered "my usual." The barista looked confused but nodded. When my drink came, it was completely wrong. Turns out, I was in the wrong coffee shop. I was too embarrassed to correct them, so I drank a weird matcha-pumpkin spice sludge. FML

I agree, your life sucks 61

You deserved it 763

Entitled

By Anonymous - This FML is from back in 2017 but it's good stuff - United States

Today, while I was working at Starbucks, a customer dumped a hot chocolate on me and yelled, saying it wasn't his order. The order actually belonged to a 4-year-old boy with the same name, who started screaming when he didn't get his chocolate. FML

I agree, your life sucks 8 357

You deserved it 613

Nice

By Anonymous - 27/07/2024 09:00 - United Kingdom

Today, I was at a coffee shop, trying to get to know the cute new barista. I wanted to compliment his nice eyes, but I got nervous and blurted out, "You have nice elbows!" He stared at me, confused, as I quickly grabbed my coffee and left. Now I can't even imagine going back there. FML

I agree, your life sucks 164

You deserved it 419

No good deed…

By noespresso - 15/08/2010 20:20 - United States

Today, after already having a terrible day, I went to Starbucks for an espresso. Being nice, I put the last dollar I had in my wallet in their tip jar. While paying for my drink, my card was denied for insufficient funds. The world hates me. FML

I agree, your life sucks 33 769

You deserved it 6 456

By joanikens - 26/03/2016 19:02 - United States - Buena Park

Today, I'm a barista at Starbucks. When my crush walked in and asked how much his coffee would cost, I said a date. He said he'd rather pay for the coffee. FML

I agree, your life sucks 24 098

You deserved it 6 119

By brannonjames - 10/05/2012 22:20 - United States

Today, I was getting coffee with my aunt, and she asked me to pay. She then turned to the Barista and said, "He's never had a girlfriend before, and I wanted to show him that they take your money." The Barista laughed so hard she had to excuse herself. FML

I agree, your life sucks 26 429

You deserved it 2 360

By sick - 30/09/2009 15:12 - United States

Today, I went to the coffee shop for my usual morning latte before class. When I got my drink, I asked again to make sure it was soy. The barista assured me it was. It wasn't. I'm ridiculously lactose intolerant and just spent six hours throwing up because she was too lazy to correct her mistake. FML

I agree, your life sucks 46 455

You deserved it 3 874

bagginzy 14

Friday 14 January 2011 8:57

Why? What was on your chest? Give us a pic and we'll find it; don't worry.

chelle_starlight 0

Friday 14 January 2011 9:02

you must have a "grande" chest...sorry...I know this comment is lame...couldn't think of anything else to say...haha

Comments

techqueen 6

Friday 14 January 2011 14:31

I demand pics.

mjacksjack 0

Friday 14 January 2011 15:05

you should have wiggled them and say "you'll never get to feel these fun bags."

djsquintz 0

Friday 14 January 2011 15:10

good job buddy! you got the joke!!

fmlisfunnyandsad 0

Friday 14 January 2011 15:15

how would she b flattered it's defiantly not flat hahahaha

spsanderson 2

Friday 14 January 2011 15:25

what?

BIGshooter 2

Friday 14 January 2011 15:46

I thought all male baristas were gay.

DjSmoz 0

Friday 14 January 2011 15:57

( o x o ) RULE!!!!

Ranimal 12

Friday 14 January 2011 16:19

Probably a new guy looking for the milk. I have no idea...

andyfreay 1

Friday 14 January 2011 16:26

I love boobies <3

mante_fml 0

Friday 14 January 2011 16:31

damn!! you must be showin them off. if you don't want guys looking. cover them. sheesh

Keywords

Break-ups Love Christmas Miscellaneous Poopoo peepee Gross Ironic Argument Friends Awkward Cute Haircut Relatable You're fired Work Cars Covid Health Jealousy Cheating Kids Parenting Family DIY Cats Roommate Sex Intimacy Am I overreacting? Management

The Top

Today, I was driving without my seatbelt on, when I noticed a police car approaching. I panicked and desperately fumbled around for my seatbelt, only for them to pass by with just a funny look. Then it hit me that I was riding my motorcycle. FML

I agree, your life sucks 25 551

You deserved it 49 635

Today, my son asked for my help with a personal matter. I was flattered that he trusted me, since he's a paranoid, untrusting psycho. Turned out he wanted to use my locksmith skills to break into his ex's house and "teach her a lesson" for breaking up with him after he cheated on her. FML

I agree, your life sucks 38 866

You deserved it 5 424

The Top

Today, after having not used my laptop since January because I thought it was broken, I found out that the key lock has been on the whole time. FML

I agree, your life sucks 11 893

You deserved it 51 977

Today, my husband and I went to my overbearing mom's 57th birthday party. He opened his gift in front of her and said smugly, "The makeup's for your face, and the prayer book's for the fat rolls." Any hope of family peace is now lost. FML

I agree, your life sucks 27 320

You deserved it 3 813

Today, I had a lovely day, right up until the moment I got home, went to change my pad, and realised that sometime in the last two hours, somewhere between the library and this moment, my pad had somehow… fallen out. So somewhere out there my bloody pad is… just there. What if someone saw? FML

I agree, your life sucks 493

You deserved it 113

#regrets

I agree, your life sucks 248

You deserved it 126

Today, I was walking down the street, wearing nothing offensive, minding my own business, when a car drove past and threw something that hit me really hard in the back of my head. It was a Bible. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 809

You deserved it 143

Today, I know my life is awesome when my partner and I have to plan watching movies and having sex around his drinking schedule. FML

I agree, your life sucks 950

You deserved it 249

Same thing different taste

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