Health: Surprise

Surprise

By Anonymous - 10/01/2011 19:14 - United States

Today, I was drinking a bottle of water. My friend came up from behind and scared me, causing me to inhale and choke on the water. Lacking air, I passed out. I awoke to him on the ground laughing his ass off. I almost drowned drinking a bottle of water. FML

I agree, your life sucks 33 337

You deserved it 4 365

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Same thing different taste

By Anonymous - 25/01/2012 17:21 - United States

Today, I was drinking from a water bottle while in a lecture. The water caught in my throat and it felt like I was choking to death. Instead of asking me if I was okay or trying to help, the guy sitting next to me told me to shut up. FML

I agree, your life sucks 29 371

You deserved it 6 465

By Anonymous - 11/08/2009 08:58 - United States

Today, I was at the pool, casually flirting with one of the lifeguards. He said that he would gladly give me CPR, in the event that I needed it. I laughed and thanked him, stating that it was a sweet idea, even though I wouldn't be needing assistance. I then choked on my bottled water. FML

I agree, your life sucks 15 938

You deserved it 44 870

By Olorin - 07/11/2011 20:49 - Germany

Today, I woke up soaked in water. It seems at some point in the middle of the night, I woke up thirsty and opened the water bottle I keep on my nightstand. I managed to drink a little, but it seems I didn't manage to put the cap back on before losing consciousness again. FML

I agree, your life sucks 26 862

You deserved it 5 782

Wardrobe change please

By Meagan Ortiz - 16/08/2020 23:02

Today, I choked on water so hard that I threw up and shat myself. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 554

You deserved it 260

Blackout

By Anonymous - 16/01/2023 22:00

Today, I blacked out at work, on my lunch break outside in the rain, and woke up on the ground wet a minute or two later to everyone freaking out, all because I chugged my drink too fast. FML

I agree, your life sucks 414

You deserved it 615

By guyshithappensto - 22/05/2010 02:41 - United States

Today, I fell asleep in class. If that wasn't bad enough, I awoke gasping for air. I almost drowned in my arm fat. FML

I agree, your life sucks 13 117

You deserved it 41 722

Damn

By suicide - 04/02/2009 15:48 - United States

Today, I took a big sip of water while on a bus. It went down the wrong pipe, causing me to cough and hack loudly. The old woman sitting across from me asked if I was OK. Jokingly, I said, "Just dying." She replied, "You too, huh?" FML

I agree, your life sucks 11 810

You deserved it 33 870

Nervous Nelly

By Anonymous - 12/05/2023 06:00 - United States

Today, I went to the dentist for a routine cleaning. As the dentist was working on my teeth, he accidentally sprayed water all over my face. I couldn't stop laughing nervously, which made the dentist think I was choking. He ended up calling for backup and I had to explain that I was just laughing. FML

I agree, your life sucks 701

You deserved it 139

By Anonymous - 28/08/2019 00:01 - Australia - Darwin

Today, I woke up in the shower at my coworker's house, with my clothes on and soaking wet. Apparently, the night before I drank too much and punched my best friend. The sad part is, I passed out on the couch, but somehow ended up in the shower, facing the wrong way. FML

I agree, your life sucks 569

You deserved it 1 893

By megan - 01/04/2015 17:56 - United States - Lutz

Today, it's April Fool's day. I had to take a CPR class, and everything was going well. We took a break and I went to get a drink of water and started choking. They thought I was making fun of the class, and made me leave. FML

I agree, your life sucks 31 210

You deserved it 2 474

satomi_ishida 0

Monday 10 January 2011 23:23

Creep, he didn't even help you? Shove some chili sauce down his throat and see if he revives from that. -_-

MassEffectNerd 0

Monday 10 January 2011 23:13

weirder things have happend

Comments

marceil 0

Tuesday 11 January 2011 9:28

i had a cousin like him lol .

CaptainJ1000 1

Tuesday 11 January 2011 11:26

You left out the part where u awoke with your exposed ass in the prone position. No wonder he was laughing...

nathan5 0

Tuesday 11 January 2011 12:52

It's not rape if you shout surprise!

thisisLAUREN 0

Tuesday 11 January 2011 13:37

passed out from lack of air? you do know that takes a couple of minutes right?

42billybob 5

Tuesday 11 January 2011 15:57

Depends on how much air you had before you got cut off. You can also pass out from the shock. Even so, it should be long enough for this "friend" to realize what was going on (unless they were ACTUALLY retarded or neurotic to some extent... which I think is the case).