Annoying, Cats and Animals: Sweep sweep

Sweep sweep

By PghSportsNation - This FML is from back in 2011 but it's good stuff - United States

Today, I awoke to my cat with micro pellets all over him. He'd destroyed a pillow containing them, and now there are thousands of these pellets throughout the entire house. My vacuum is broken. FML

I agree, your life sucks 27 871

You deserved it 4 477

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Same thing different taste

By tannarox - 28/01/2012 15:46 - United States

Today, our rodent problem was taken care of. I discovered this when my cat projectile-vomited a soggy, death-scented wad of dark fur and tiny organs onto the couch. FML

I agree, your life sucks 26 791

You deserved it 2 561

By Ethan - 17/10/2009 11:13 - United States

Today, I awoke to find a giant turd on my carpet, cat hair everywhere in my room, and a big hole in my window screen. I don't own a cat. FML

I agree, your life sucks 38 114

You deserved it 2 404

By FellingShitty - 05/10/2009 02:19 - United States

Today, I realized I'm missing my diamond earrings. After ripping apart the vacuum bag and exhausting all other options I'm pretty sure my new cat ate them. I'm going to go sift through several days worth of cat shit now. FML

I agree, your life sucks 34 492

You deserved it 6 436

This is mine

By Anonymous - 03/09/2014 23:13 - United States - Santa Ana

Today, I bought a new beanbag chair. My cat thought it was a great scratcher and I now have thousands of tiny plastic balls around the house. He decided those looked yummy, and now the scent of vomit and plastic is awful. FML

I agree, your life sucks 36 439

You deserved it 5 668

Welcome home!

By Anonymous - 19/03/2023 09:00 - United Kingdom

Today, I got home after a spending a week recovery from surgery. My neighbour had been feeding my cat whilst I was away. Exhausted, I went straight to my bedroom where I soon discovered that my cat had shat on my pillows, duvet, and pyjamas. FML

I agree, your life sucks 830

You deserved it 143

By Ellencrazee - 13/08/2011 10:22 - United Kingdom

Today, I came home from holiday, only to find my house full of small decomposing animals, courtesy of my cat. FML

I agree, your life sucks 28 744

You deserved it 5 265

Book it!

By Kiera Ayala - 08/06/2019 12:00

Today, I got into bed as my cat crept under it. I then heard him gagging, so I instantly got back up to get him out, because my floor is carpeted. As I pulled him into the hall, he flew upwards, made a horrific "Blagh!" sound, projectile vomited everywhere, then hit the wall and ran. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 604

You deserved it 322

By Anonymous - 20/07/2019 09:00 - United States - Tulsa

Today, my cat attempted to make up for my insomnia with a dead mouse. I have no idea where he got it. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 530

You deserved it 200

By crazycat - 13/05/2011 16:23 - Canada

Today, in the early hours of the morning, my cat started scratching at my legs. I got out of bed and he raced me to the stairs, tripping me. I fell all the way down and landed in cat poop. FML

I agree, your life sucks 33 624

You deserved it 5 848

By Anonymous - 30/03/2012 07:45 - Australia - Perth

Today, I woke up to what sounded like twigs snapping. Turns out it was the skull of a live mouse being crushed in my cat's jaws. FML

I agree, your life sucks 26 265

You deserved it 2 745

Mean_Mr_Mustard 9

Friday 2 September 2011 18:53

Bummer. Maybe this means you should buy a new vacuum.

iAmScrubs 19

Friday 2 September 2011 18:54

Make a ball pit with the pellets. Who doesn't love ball pits? I still go to the McDonald's play pen just for the ball pit.

Comments

zombiekitten87 12

Friday 2 September 2011 20:39

You can always rent a vacuum or have it repaired, but I'd be more concerned that your cat probably ate some of the pellets...

YurTriniFantasy 1

Friday 2 September 2011 20:44

If yu start now with that broom you might finish by the end of the week!

HU4L188 0

Friday 2 September 2011 21:03

I love cats

hockey199813 5

Friday 2 September 2011 21:36

Real men

THE_A_TEEN 27

Friday 2 September 2011 23:10

Real men what? Finish your sentence.

i_am_that_one 0

Friday 2 September 2011 21:42

Well u could always pick it up one by one... Either way this is a shitty situation...

muffins650 1

Friday 2 September 2011 21:45

Lame.. I have a broken vacuum too :(

staats_tristan 4

Thursday 8 September 2011 1:43

haha loser

RichieChico 0

Friday 2 September 2011 21:57

I'd bet any money it was a Sobakawa pillow. Sooo comfy!

AustinSilar 0

Friday 2 September 2011 22:00

atleast it wasent rat posioning...

rynoguy 0

Friday 2 September 2011 22:47

Use a broom

OfficeNinja 5

Friday 2 September 2011 22:50

your cat just needed fresh litter.

Keywords

Animals Cats Awkward Christmas Health Embarrassing Work Love Anniversary Boredom Abuse Ironic Intimacy Am I overreacting? Alcohol Drunk Transportation AITA Parents Gun control Kids Language Noise Mysterious Relatable Money Delivery Miscellaneous Food Family

The Top

Today, my friends and I decided to compare dick sizes one by one. I was last and I was the smallest. I was also the only Asian amongst my friends. They now call me "the stereotype". FML

I agree, your life sucks 46 643

You deserved it 29 280

Today, I had to go tree shopping with my dad and some of his work buddies. It hit its lowest point when one loudly told us about a crap handjob he got recently. "I mean yeah, choke the cock," he said, "but don't choke it to DEATH, nam'sayin'?" I'd never wanted to just drop dead more. FML

I agree, your life sucks 39 974

You deserved it 3 568

The Top

Today, my rescue squad unit responded to a 911 call from a woman who felt she was going to pass out. We knocked on her locked door a couple times with no answer. Fearing she might be unconscious, I kicked in the door. She was about to open it and only passed out from the concussion I gave her. FML

I agree, your life sucks 539

You deserved it 59

Today, I made two cakes. One for my boyfriend's birthday tomorrow, the other for my family so they wouldn't eat the birthday cake. I came home to find they ate half of each. FML

I agree, your life sucks 49 267

You deserved it 4 288

Today, I got a text from someone I met last night at a bar. We texted all day and planned to meet up later. The whole time I had in my mind who he was, but when we met up it was someone completely different that I didn't remember. I had to sit through the whole date pretending I knew him. FML

I agree, your life sucks 25 347

You deserved it 37 890

Today, I showed up to work at 6am, only to find out the schedule was changed. I wasn't actually supposed to be there until 9:15. My boss never told me this. I didn't get to go home either, he just said "Oh well. Get to work." FML

I agree, your life sucks 32 421

You deserved it 2 979

Today, I'm working for a company that makes over a million dollars a year, yet leaves me with no choice but to pee in a cup because they won't pay to fix the only toilet in the building. FML

I agree, your life sucks 31 811

You deserved it 2 460

Today, my girlfriend fell asleep while giving me head. FML

I agree, your life sucks 31 605

You deserved it 6 222