Tanned

By caughtorangehanded - 01/10/2010 22:12 - United States

Spicy
Today, I found out my older brother put tanning lotion in the lotion I use to masturbate with. Now I have orange palms and an orange penis which won't go away for weeks. FML
I agree, your life sucks 20 918
You deserved it 46 336
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Same thing different taste

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Top comments

untoward 0

well if your masturbating so much, probably no one is seeing your penis anyway

194 10

Comments

OuchFireAnts 0

Umpa Lumpa crotch

1 0
AudaciouslyInsan 0

It's actually 'Oompa Loompa'. :D Nice try though.

0 0
LauranceMonroe 0

lucky for you no body is going to see it, since... well lets start with the fact that you have a special type of cream you use to **********.

0 0
stewpididiot 11

Yeah SDK. you NEVER **********, do you?

0 0
hahaalolz 0

dman, I swear u go to my school... ur name is Damien... ???

0 0
hahaalolz 0

**** don't worry just looked at ur profile, fail. go me

0 0
FirstBornUnicorn 0

Just go to Jersey. The girls there are used to orange penises.

3 0
lotuspod 0

lmao jersey is the birth place of oompa loompas so many orange fake tans

0 0
peacelovekat 0

if ur masturbating I don think anyone would see it any way

0 4
MetalHead93GB 0

I ********** and I get laid quite frequently... your point ?

2 0
ThatOneGuy921 0

no one would see it but still that sucks for him.. having an orange penis and all... btw I love ur hair :)!!

0 1
killabee 0

What's the BFD about masturbating? Guess what, masturbating does not make you single, a loser, or mean you don't get any. Is that what all the YDI's were about, because he masturbates???

7 0
5t3ff1k4h 44

The more the guy whacks it, the more he'll want sex in general. OP, this is improving your sex life. Shut up and let him feel good.

1 1
killabee 0

Who are you telling to shut-up?

2 4
5t3ff1k4h 44

Did you see that the latter half of my post was addressed to the OP?

2 1
killabee 0

That's why I was unsure. "this is improving your sex life, shutup and let him feel good" So shutup OP and let yourself feel good? Then why did you say "him"? Not a big deal, it just sounded like you were talking to me, but we were in agreement on the whole masturbation issue so it was odd.

1 0
5t3ff1k4h 44

My bad; my mind's a little fuzzy today.... I'm not exactly clear in my thinking! Hahaha. Anyway, what I was trying to get at was the fact that the more the guy whacks it, the more he'll want sex... which is good because it'll lead to a more active sex life... but what I didn't take into account was that he may or may not have a girlfriend (who I thought was the OP). I apparently threw the girlfriend in there somewhere. Oops! Maybe it's time to retire for the night...

1 0
MAGNAVOX 0

I want you in my sex life .

0 0
The_Earth 0

I used to ********** too. then I realized I was killing humans by drowning them. so I had to stop. but luckily I met the moon. she's so sweet and faithful.

1 0
rasellersjr 0

lol great profile

0 0