Miscellaneous: The blame game - FML

The blame game

By Anonymous - 12/01/2016 14:44

Today, I'm mad at my dad for forgetting it's my birthday. He's mad at me for not reminding him. FML

I agree, your life sucks 20 784

You deserved it 1 910

Thanksgiving: Turkeys and Skids
Family meals that turn absurd, because Thanksgiving is also about laughing at little disasters. More…

Previous FML Next FML

Same thing different taste

By mydadforgetsme - 04/11/2015 17:26 - United States - Philadelphia

Today, my dad forgot it's my birthday. When I told him about it, he accused me of lying and threatened to ground me for a week. FML

I agree, your life sucks 23 689

You deserved it 1 468

By Ya_I_said_it - 26/07/2016 15:31

Today, I've been so stressed out that I forgot my own birthday. I only remembered when my mom talked to me to let me know she wasn't planning on doing anything for it. FML

I agree, your life sucks 16 626

You deserved it 1 511

Classic Mom

By secret - This FML is from back in 2015 but it's good stuff - United States - Ashford

Today, I got a text from my mom shaming me for forgetting my sister's birthday. It isn't her birthday today, it's mine. FML

I agree, your life sucks 40 451

You deserved it 2 302

Sorry dad

By janess - 09/03/2021 11:00

Today, I forgot my father’s birthday. My father means the world to me, I just have a shit memory. FML

I agree, your life sucks 779

You deserved it 423

This guy grudges

By PocketTrash - 20/03/2020 21:00

Today, my dad is still mad because I tossed his empty coffee can over 3 days ago. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 398

You deserved it 241

By Anonymous - 09/11/2013 22:30 - New Zealand - Hamilton

Today, I heard my dad complaining that he won't be able to go to a concert, because it's happening on my birthday. This is the first time he's even acknowledged my birthday in over ten years. FML

I agree, your life sucks 44 778

You deserved it 3 317

Lovely parents

By sigh - 18/11/2019 01:00 - Singapore - Singapore

Today, my parents forgot it was my birthday. They ordered me to scrub the common bathroom, and when I asked if they remembered, my dad's reaction was "Oh! Really?" My mom's was "I thought that it was next week." What lovely parents I have. FML

I agree, your life sucks 2 333

You deserved it 200

By Anon - 01/04/2015 06:06 - United States - San Francisco

Today, my brother mentioned my dad's birthday party. I said, "What party?" He said, "Shit, forgot I wasn't supposed to tell you." My own father doesn't want me at his party. FML

I agree, your life sucks 33 169

You deserved it 3 585

By MeanMother - 28/06/2012 20:29 - United States - Saint Louis

Today, I realized just how much of a bitch I am when I grounded my son for not telling me what he got me for my birthday. FML

I agree, your life sucks 7 963

You deserved it 91 224

By Anonymous - 01/07/2011 01:27 - United States

Today, my dad forgot me at cross country practice. When he got there two hours late, instead of apologizing, he said, "Hey, that's only the third time I've forgotten you at practice. You should be congratulating me." FML

I agree, your life sucks 31 757

You deserved it 2 830

Next

Top comments

mld4657 28

Wednesday 13 January 2016 1:29

Well im not your father but Happy Birthday!!!!

InfestedCarOwner 15

Wednesday 13 January 2016 1:35

Your dad sure is a special kind of asshole, huh?

Comments

mld4657 28

Wednesday 13 January 2016 1:29

Well im not your father but Happy Birthday!!!!

crudeandrudeguy 29

Wednesday 13 January 2016 1:37

As far as you know...

mld4657 28

Wednesday 13 January 2016 1:47

O.o good point sir buttttt im not an asshole I wouldn't forget

GhostFox 33

Wednesday 13 January 2016 2:06

But #1 is a lady, so they would have had to be to be OP's mother? O.o

XxDanno316xX 27

Wednesday 13 January 2016 3:09

14, I feel like you missed the joke mate :)

mld4657 28

Wednesday 13 January 2016 3:32

hmm I dont remember having children. well im a crappy parent then

jms1555 15

Wednesday 13 January 2016 1:29

That's just shitty..

jms1555 15

Wednesday 13 January 2016 1:30

And happy Birthday by the way!

Moskaaa7 26

Wednesday 13 January 2016 1:33

A vicious cycle of people being mad at each other!

UncleCaitlyn 21

Wednesday 13 January 2016 1:33

To get him back put a fake spider on his phone

InfestedCarOwner 15

Wednesday 13 January 2016 1:35

Your dad sure is a special kind of asshole, huh?

ananicosia 28

Wednesday 13 January 2016 3:58

A bleached asshole

thefmlman2011 36

Wednesday 13 January 2016 4:44

hahahaha

Scarylizard1798 23

Wednesday 13 January 2016 1:36

Ah parents

nzhx 23

Wednesday 13 January 2016 1:36

Happy birthday, OP! I'm sorry it seems to not have gone as nicely as you'd hoped, but I'm sure despite his pride, your father is wishing you a happy one as well

Tejanoswhy 19

Wednesday 13 January 2016 1:39

Your dad is an asshat but happy birthday

rissamarie 24

Wednesday 13 January 2016 1:56

Hey it's my birthday too! Happy birthday OP!

Keywords

Awkward Miscellaneous Embarrassing Work Sleep Dating Love Am I overreacting? Annoying Parents Health Mental health Furniture Kids Gross Friends Public freakouts Fight Cops Drugs Neighbours Medication Relatable Dogs Animals Teenagers Gamers Ironic Video games Job interview

The Top

Today, I slipped on some ice and wrecked my back. When my husband and I went to go to bed, he begged me to take one of the pain pills left over from his recent surgery. Not so I could feel better and get some rest, but so he could have sex. FML

I agree, your life sucks 36 272

You deserved it 3 976

Well. I must admit when I first received today's illustration, seeing the massive pliers pop out kind of freaked me out. Then I reached the last panel and I'm not sure if it's out of anxiety relief or what, but I laughed so hard I might have choked a...

I agree, your life sucks 0

You deserved it 0

The Top

Today, when I arrived at work, I was greeted by my gorgeous coworker telling me my red shirt looked awesome on me. Before I could compliment her, she added that the color was fitting perfectly with my acne. I heard a couple of giggles around me. FML

I agree, your life sucks 49 415

You deserved it 3 637

Today, I woke up at 4 a.m. to the smell of something burning. My husband and I checked the house, and I was convinced there was possibly an electric fire. Went back to bed, then when I woke again I remembered I'd straightened my hair the day before and that’s what the burnt smell was. FML

I agree, your life sucks 192

You deserved it 726

Today, I took my boyfriend of 2 years on a family vacation to meet my family for the first time. We all got really drunk and he made out with my dad. This was day one and we don't fly back for another 16 days. FML

I agree, your life sucks 26 502

You deserved it 3 286

Today, my ten-year-old brother came to visit me in NYC. Within ten minutes of walking on Times Square he had seen a prostitute and a partially-naked man. He now refuses to leave my apartment and screams when I try to drag him out. He's here for the next two weeks. FML

I agree, your life sucks 49 131

You deserved it 4 898

Today, as well as for the past week, my cat finds immeasurable joy in knocking eggs of the counter and staring at me as I clean the mess. FML

I agree, your life sucks 4 232

You deserved it 1 156

Today, my girlfriend and I were making out while she was laying on me. Her little brother walked in, saw us and yelled, "Mom they're swallowing each other!" FML

I agree, your life sucks 32 726

You deserved it 24 587