Intimacy: The scientific method

The scientific method

By really - 21/06/2012 05:30 - United States - Bonney Lake

Today, my boyfriend thought he could make a pregnancy test read positive by jizzing on it. FML

I agree, your life sucks 33 860

You deserved it 4 837

November 11: Memories and smiles
Historical anecdotes with a light touch to commemorate with a respectful smile. More…

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Same thing different taste

Not a biology major

By Anonymous - 27/10/2019 04:00

Today, I found out my boyfriend ate glitter. When I asked him why he would do such an insane thing, he replied, "I wanted my jizz to sparkle." FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 678

You deserved it 281

By Anonymous - 10/01/2011 02:35 - United States

Today, I was at my boyfriend's house, in the bathroom. I noticed a pregnancy test in the trash can. He lives alone. FML

I agree, your life sucks 41 516

You deserved it 3 137

By Anonymous - 04/12/2013 22:08 - United States - Marsing

Today, I told my boyfriend that I've missed my period, and that I think I might be pregnant. He started panicking and ended up puking in the toilet. FML

I agree, your life sucks 47 470

You deserved it 12 273

Wrap it up

By Anonymous - 17/11/2023 16:00 - Sweden - Linköping

Today, I found out that my boyfriend cheated on me by testing myself for STIs/STDs and got a positive result for chlamydia. FML

I agree, your life sucks 642

You deserved it 94

By Pissy - 23/05/2019 06:05

Today, I thought my boyfriend wanted to be romantic by pouring a bath, getting in then calling me in. As I get comfortable, he stands up and gets out. At the same time, I notice yellow water. He'd pissed in the tub for a joke. FML

I agree, your life sucks 2 365

You deserved it 232

By Jessie - 22/08/2019 12:01 - United Kingdom - Brighton

Today, I told my boyfriend of 4 years that I'm pregnant. He suggested we get a paternity test done. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 888

You deserved it 332

By Anonymous - 06/12/2013 21:37 - United States - Albuquerque

Today, my boyfriend and I took a nap, fully clothed. I woke up to him panicking. He'd had a wet dream and was scared that his sperm somehow swam through several layers of clothing and got me pregnant. FML

I agree, your life sucks 58 089

You deserved it 6 008

By Anonymous - 07/06/2016 07:45

Today, my boyfriend called me into the bathroom and proudly showed me how far back he could stand from the toilet while he peed. Unfortunately, he got distracted and peed all over the floor I had mopped just an hour before. FML

I agree, your life sucks 13 897

You deserved it 1 238

By Anonymous - 12/04/2014 05:24 - United States

Today, I found out I was pregnant. When I told my boyfriend, his response was, "I'll start watching pregnant porn to build up an attraction to it." FML

I agree, your life sucks 57 921

You deserved it 8 415

By S…… - 09/01/2011 10:18 - Singapore

Today, my boyfriend and I had sex. He decided to make gun sound effects as he came. FML

I agree, your life sucks 31 389

You deserved it 5 766

zaksyak 1

Thursday 21 June 2012 12:08

You Can't?

xoxosuperbad 5

Thursday 21 June 2012 12:07

You hit the jackpot there

Comments

janerose21 3

Thursday 21 June 2012 19:23

RIP brain cells !!

MD5385457 2

Thursday 21 June 2012 20:05

What a dumbass

stepymac 15

Thursday 21 June 2012 20:29

Did it work?

AvaCharlie 6

Thursday 21 June 2012 20:42

He must be very special

KiddNYC1O 20

Thursday 21 June 2012 22:28

He just wanted to know if he's sterile or not.

JDawg113 0

Thursday 21 June 2012 21:11

.....Really?

YourMoms_BF 2

Thursday 21 June 2012 22:42

Please neuter your bf.

Jasonf6 0

Thursday 21 June 2012 22:49

Got a real winner there.

lovepandorasaver 11

Thursday 21 June 2012 22:58

Reminded me of the FML with the guy using his penis to play a iphone game, except this isn't cool at all.

tashaprincess 3

Thursday 21 June 2012 23:47

Haha. I like!!

thunter2000 2

Friday 22 June 2012 1:27

Did it?

Keywords

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The Top

Today, as a CNA, I had to go through the belongings of a patient. His phone rang and I answered - it was his boss. As I explained, he cut me off and said to "drop the act" and "he better be there now or he's fired". He was pronounced dead-on-arrival. FML

I agree, your life sucks 3 674

You deserved it 197

You’re probably wondering what this website is all about. Well, it’s basically a bunch of people who had enough humor to tell you all about their shitty lives, and what it was that made their day suck a big fat one. Some are sad in funny way, som...

I agree, your life sucks 13

You deserved it 13

The Top

Today, the only reason I have toilet paper is because someone decided to teepee my driveway and left an entire roll behind. FML

I agree, your life sucks 19 867

You deserved it 2 065

Today, as my boyfriend and I were getting hot in the bedroom, he stopped right before he entered me and said, "Knock knock!" He refused to continue until I replied, "Come in." FML

I agree, your life sucks 32 364

You deserved it 4 884

Today, it's Saturday night, and also Halloween. Instead of going out, I'm sitting at home on MSN telling everyone who asks me what I'm doing tonight that I'm 'going out in 10 minutes to a party', then when 10 minutes pass, I block them. FML

I agree, your life sucks 29 646

You deserved it 26 359

Today, I helped a man with a neck brace get on the bus. I fell asleep, only to wake up later on to him gratuitously stroking my breasts with his elbow. FML

I agree, your life sucks 32 430

You deserved it 4 337

Today, I walked to work. I later discovered that my husband had parked my car in a no-parking area. My job is towing cars. I had to tow my own car. FML

I agree, your life sucks 55 047

You deserved it 5 653

Today, my switch to night shifts has coincided nicely with my neighbour buying her twin juvenile delinquent crotch goblins a drum set and a guitar. Now during the daylight hours, when I’m supposed to be asleep, all I can hear is their racket on the other side of the wall, mere feet from my head FML

I agree, your life sucks 446

You deserved it 124

The scientific method

Same thing different taste

Not a biology major

Wrap it up

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