Health: Today, a train hit me. A slow mini-train full of kindergartners... - FML

By MahSquito - 06/02/2012 02:14 - United States

Today, a train hit me. A slow mini-train full of kindergartners who were on a tour of the museum I was visiting. FML

I agree, your life sucks 25 499

You deserved it 6 376

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Same thing different taste

By off-balance - 16/01/2016 15:00 - Finland

Today, as I was trying to get off a crowded train, some asshole pushed past me hard enough to nearly knock me over. My bag hit a preschool kid standing behind me, and I missed my stop trying to apologize to him. His mom yelled at me all the way to the next stop. FML

I agree, your life sucks 21 975

You deserved it 1 424

By future teacher - 09/07/2015 06:21 - Paraguay - Fernando De La Mora

Today, I was observing a children's class as a part of a training program. The teacher asked me to take one kid to the nurse's office because she wasn't feeling well. As soon as we step outside, I slip and fall down, taking the little girl with me. FML

I agree, your life sucks 26 252

You deserved it 2 964

By bkeiya - 08/04/2009 12:49 - Japan

Today, I saw my train pulling in to the station. I sprinted up the stairs and luckily made the train. I looked around and no one was in my compartment. I began to notice that the train was heading down some tracks I'd never been too. I got stuck on an empty train for 3 hours in the train garage. FML

I agree, your life sucks 59 557

You deserved it 15 041

By sleeper - 02/03/2010 05:05 - France

Today, I was on the train when I fell asleep. Everything would have been fine but I was suddenly jerked awake by the very loud sound of my own fart, followed by the stares of many strangers. FML

I agree, your life sucks 26 312

You deserved it 6 070

Don't tread on me

By Kate - 23/04/2009 14:09 - United States

Today, I was waiting for the train. It arrived, I got on and the woman behind me stepped on the back of my shoe. My shoe came flying off and landed in the gutter between the train and the platform. The doors closed, the train pulled away. FML

I agree, your life sucks 57 925

You deserved it 3 219

By Anonymous - 21/07/2011 10:43 - Australia

Today, I was sitting waiting for my train for a long while. When it finally came, I had pins and needles in my foot. When I got up, I fell and unsuccessfully stumbled towards the train. The doors closed and it left without me. FML

I agree, your life sucks 31 770

You deserved it 4 608

The tourist

By Sam - 09/02/2011 20:56 - United States

Today, I toured an art museum. Our tour guide had an obvious lisp, so I tried my best not to laugh. When she asked me a question about a sculpture, I accidentally replied, "Yeth ma'am." She ended the tour right there. FML

I agree, your life sucks 9 567

You deserved it 68 935

By Anonymous - 29/12/2010 07:03 - United States

Today, on the train, I was bitten by a homeless man. FML

I agree, your life sucks 44 722

You deserved it 4 349

Run run run

By cmzraxsn - This FML is from back in 2010 but it's good stuff - United Kingdom

Today, I ran to catch the train, but slipped on the stairs and fell on my shoulder. However, my effort was rendered useless; it wasn't even my train. FML

I agree, your life sucks 25 634

You deserved it 5 417

By Anonymous - 15/01/2011 07:22 - Germany

Today, my class went to Berlin. At the subway station, our teacher told us to get on the next train. I was the first one to get on and the only one who didn't hear her saying: 'Wait, that's the wrong one!' I'm lost in a city I've never been before. FML

I agree, your life sucks 34 731

You deserved it 6 235

Next

Top comments

bjr1208 3

Monday 6 February 2012 8:37

Damn trains come out of nowhere

zoPwNAgEzo 21

Monday 6 February 2012 8:38

+100 for the kindergarteners

Comments

BeaterOfTheDrums 15

Monday 6 February 2012 8:46

He could 'ave not noticed it, don't ya know.

Thelnternet 7

Monday 6 February 2012 8:46

i like trains

jtthegr8 26

Monday 6 February 2012 8:48

Asdf reference :D

nabila21 0

Monday 6 February 2012 8:56

I liek Trains.

KiddNYC1O 20

Monday 6 February 2012 20:06

I like turtles.

bizarre_ftw 21

Monday 6 February 2012 8:57

Ahhh Canadian based humour, you'd think at some point someone would call it racist. But no. Mostly because all the big racal discrimination reformers that could make things happen are either dead or laughing at the jokes

Clamcreepy 7

Monday 6 February 2012 9:01

Conductor(teacher):"full steam ahead!" That train might have been slow but when it's in full steam ahead it's hard to stop those things good thing no one was injured. Right?

sunworshiper 10

Monday 6 February 2012 9:10

And the fact that us Canadians are just too chill to care about people that make fun of our accents, eh?

shazza26 1

Monday 6 February 2012 9:24

At least it wasn't an actual train!

JAB2010 1

Monday 6 February 2012 9:51

Also, 'Canadian' is a nationality--not a race.

SweetPerfectionn 3

Monday 6 February 2012 10:02

Did you happen to say "I like trains" before it happened? Doubt many people will get what I'm referencing to.. Lol

BGosh 3

Monday 28 January 2013 22:16

Asdf! :D

mollysbp 0

Monday 6 February 2012 10:08

At least it wasn't a real one?

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Keywords

Miscellaneous Embarrassing Awkward Sleep Work Love Dating Annoying Am I overreacting? Health Parents Mental health Furniture Kids Friends Gross Public freakouts Fight Neighbours Cops Drugs Relatable Medication Animals Dogs Teenagers Ironic Video games Gamers Zoom

The Top

Today, I went out to dinner with my boyfriend and his mom. The hostess asked if I needed "the kid's menu," remarked how I look "so grown up for your age," and asked what grade I was in. I said I'm in university. She laughed as if it was the best joke ever told. I'm 22. FML

I agree, your life sucks 31 774

You deserved it 2 046

Today, my husband decided to flash me while I was on a video call, so my clients announced they would only work with professionals, and ended the call. I was giving a virtual showing of a £1.2 million house they were thinking of buying. At 6% commission, my husband's junk just cost us £72,000. FML

I agree, your life sucks 2 406

You deserved it 276

The Top

Today, while at a funeral for a distant family member, I was giving my condolences to the family. When one of them asked how I was doing, I replied with, "I'm still alive!", which is one of my standard responses due to being a cashier and being asked that question a hundred times a day. FML

I agree, your life sucks 45 892

You deserved it 12 694

Today, a little girl asked me how I could be so fat and still have small boobs. Great question. FML

I agree, your life sucks 38 635

You deserved it 8 142

Today, I learned two things. First, my girlfriend loves sex. Second, I'm practically the only one she hasn't had sex with in the 2 months we've been dating. FML

I agree, your life sucks 63 503

You deserved it 6 079

Today, I was lying in bed with my girlfriend. Trying to be romantic, I complimented her on how nice her hair smelled. She replied: "Yeah? Wait till you smell this." then let out the vilest, most nauseating fart I'd ever smelled in my life. FML

I agree, your life sucks 39 397

You deserved it 7 347

Today, my wife told me that she wants a divorce. Apparently, I'm taking too long to forgive her for having an affair. FML

I agree, your life sucks 51 038

You deserved it 4 118

Today, after a three day hospitalization, four weeks of a new heart med, no alcohol and no caffeine, my heart rhythm was finally back on track. That is until some a-hole teens decided that banging loudly on my door and running away was hilarious. Oh well, back to square one. FML

I agree, your life sucks 772

You deserved it 98