Love: Today, I was lying in bed with my girlfriend. Trying to be romantic,...

By allgassedout - 04/01/2015 00:23 - United States - Sacramento

Today, I was lying in bed with my girlfriend. Trying to be romantic, I complimented her on how nice her hair smelled. She replied: "Yeah? Wait till you smell this." then let out the vilest, most nauseating fart I'd ever smelled in my life. FML

I agree, your life sucks 39 397

You deserved it 7 347

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Same thing different taste

By DSM - 14/03/2009 11:05 - United States

Today, I was going to attempt to compliment my girlfriend, I planned on telling her that she smelled really nice. In a loving tone, I confidently told her, "Baby, you have a certain stench to you." FML

I agree, your life sucks 20 811

You deserved it 117 394

By pikachu - 20/01/2009 20:00 - United States

Today, my girlfriend farted in her sleep, woke me up because it was so damn loud, and my room smelt like rotten noodles for about an hour. FML

I agree, your life sucks 29 580

You deserved it 4 540

By hotboxed - 13/07/2019 18:30

Today, while we were sleeping, my girlfriend and I rolled to opposite sides of the bed. When I woke up, I moved closer and wrapped my arm around her. Her response was to fart in her sleep, resulting in a smell so noxious that I had no choice but to roll back to the other side. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 611

You deserved it 393

By SkinsCastSelection - 17/01/2011 09:53 - France

Today, in the middle of the night, my girlfriend whispered "Are you asleep?" I chose not to respond, to see what she'd do. She then let rip a loud, stinking fart, giggled, and went back to sleep. FML

I agree, your life sucks 17 112

You deserved it 41 513

By Harry Dare - 02/09/2011 16:31 - United Kingdom

Today, just after waking up, I caught a glimpse of my girlfriend in the mirror. Not knowing I was awake, she sniffed at her armpits, started gagging, then quietly came back to bed. FML

I agree, your life sucks 33 993

You deserved it 4 322

By Gas-pingForAir - 19/09/2016 08:59 - United States - Columbia

Today, my girlfriend managed to trap a fart in her nightgown and carry it all the way from the bathroom, into our bedroom, and finally into our bed. FML

I agree, your life sucks 12 787

You deserved it 1 670

By ThisIsMyLife - 04/06/2017 04:00

Today, while naked, my fiancée said there was something wrong with her butt. She turned around and I leaned in to look at it. She then farted in my face. On purpose. FML

I agree, your life sucks 4 556

You deserved it 1 615

By Anonymous - 01/04/2011 04:32 - United States

Today, my boyfriend and I were lying in bed together, and I was in a snuggly mood. I rolled over to gaze lovingly into his eyes and whisper sweet nothings to him in the darkness. His response? "Dear God! Did somebody fart in your mouth?!" FML

I agree, your life sucks 28 732

You deserved it 36 358

By Anonymous - 15/08/2012 00:12 - United States

Today, wanting to be romantic, I came home with flowers, and told my girlfriend I love her and that I never want us to fall apart. Before I could finish my second sentence, she farted, said, "Aww, that's so sweet" and quickly excused herself to the bathroom. FML

I agree, your life sucks 26 165

You deserved it 2 911

Gas wars

By Ali - 04/10/2020 23:02

Today, my boyfriend came over for the first time and we were alone. He was being super romantic and snuggling with me, and then out of nowhere he let out the biggest fart I've ever heard. He then explained how I should try to compete with it. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 119

You deserved it 385

jackwilliams 9

Sunday 4 January 2015 9:20

I love it when stereotypical gender roles get reversed

NebulaNick 12

Sunday 4 January 2015 9:18

Fire back

Comments

NebulaNick 12

Sunday 4 January 2015 9:18

Fire back

PennyLane27 32

Sunday 4 January 2015 10:02

Fart Wars- The Phantom Menace

kiaora_fml 11

Sunday 4 January 2015 10:47

Its all great until someone ***** themselves lol

fuckyourlifeOP 25

Sunday 4 January 2015 13:00

It's all ***** and giggles until somebody giggles and *****.

blueblu97 16

Sunday 4 January 2015 22:30

He can't he's all gassed out, it's right in the username!

incoherentrmblr 21

Monday 5 January 2015 6:56

That must've been one warm Dutch oven...

joe3_fml 15

Sunday 4 January 2015 9:19

She's a keeper.

thatnucca 36

Sunday 4 January 2015 19:43

That sure is one way to keep things funky...

jackwilliams 9

Sunday 4 January 2015 9:20

I love it when stereotypical gender roles get reversed

cassieoco 9

Sunday 4 January 2015 9:20

Wife her

PennyLane27 32

Sunday 4 January 2015 10:00

YES!!! Seriously, her humor rocks and you Wanna marry someone you can fart around/is comfortable farting around you.

omgitsmoe 26

Sunday 4 January 2015 9:20

A Dutch oven but without the sheets?

RobinGoodfellow 47

Sunday 4 January 2015 9:38

We call that farting.

Erebus_Terror 12

Sunday 4 January 2015 12:14

They should've called it German oven, just sayin.

AnalAssassin1 14

Sunday 4 January 2015 12:46

If you're saying what I think you're saying, uncool.

FBellesLife 15

Sunday 4 January 2015 22:26

I seen the humour and I am German.

crudeandrudeguy 29

Monday 1 February 2016 20:14

79- It's easy to see the humor when you're German, try to see the humor when you're Jewish....

DolphinLaser23 24

Sunday 4 January 2015 9:21

Shrek would be proud

JocelynKaulitz 28

Sunday 4 January 2015 12:02

Not until someone's dead

thespiantess 18

Sunday 4 January 2015 13:18

Shrek is love. Shrek is life.

MzZombicidal 36

Sunday 4 January 2015 9:22

Hey, just be happy you two are that comfortable with each other! Even if your sense of smell has to suffer for it. ;P

Dlzq 22

Sunday 4 January 2015 9:22

That's a keeper for sure, gg

RobinGoodfellow 47

Sunday 4 January 2015 9:25

Romance at its finest.

sstahpp 33

Sunday 4 January 2015 9:28

YDI for complimenting her

Keywords

Awkward Embarrassing Miscellaneous Work Sleep Dating Love Am I overreacting? Annoying Parents Health Mental health Furniture Kids Gross Friends Public freakouts Fight Cops Drugs Neighbours Medication Relatable Teenagers Dogs Animals Gamers Ironic Video games Job interview

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Today, the woman I love, who rejected me countless times, got a boyfriend. Bitter about it, I post on my Instagram Story: “I could have been your love bug, but apparently you’re into roaches.” She posted a story of them kissing, saying, “I love my roach so much!” FML

I agree, your life sucks 35

You deserved it 1 168

It's great to see you ! How was july ? Hot, sweaty, flirty ? How I miseed talking to you (and getting one or two comments if we're lucky enough). But let's not complain, a whole month welcoming artists for their second rounds who gave us brand new il...

I agree, your life sucks 15

You deserved it 18

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Today, I need a remote position due to a disability, but no company will even try to work with me. My car just died. I'll never be able to live on my own, despite being 30. The worst part? All the people who are gonna reply and call me "entitled." FML

I agree, your life sucks 465

You deserved it 168

Today, it's been two years since I won a romantic dinner for two from a work raffle. It's been two years and I still haven't found anyone to go with. FML

I agree, your life sucks 850

You deserved it 130

Today, there was a fire alarm in my dorm. Just as I was leaving my room, a lady in the hallway told me that it was a drill and they'd be inspecting rooms, so I would need to leave my door unlocked. When I came back, my room was trashed and my laptop, speakers, and jewelry were gone. FML

I agree, your life sucks 41 677

You deserved it 16 936

Today, I was at my boyfriend's house. We'd been talking about the move where you pick a girl up and kiss, and how romantic that would be, so we decided to try it. When he picked me up, my head slammed against his ceiling fan. FML

I agree, your life sucks 49 538

You deserved it 12 664

Today, I finally told my boyfriend that he's not very good at dirty talk. He does it every time we have sex and it always turns me off. He started crying. FML

I agree, your life sucks 40 345

You deserved it 7 289

Today, my boyfriend and I got into a fight about a clogged toilet. He was yelling about not having enough money to buy a better plunger and so I stormed out to buy one myself. While pulling his truck into traffic, a car hit me causing $1000 in damage. FML

I agree, your life sucks 26 588

You deserved it 9 615

Same thing different taste

Gas wars

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