Miscellaneous: Today, a very attractive man asked me out. I'd have been flattered... - FML

By Hello Nurse - 24/09/2012 04:32 - United States - El Macero

Today, a very attractive man asked me out. I'd have been flattered if I weren't the nurse assigned to his laboring wife. FML

I agree, your life sucks 29 384

You deserved it 1 770

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Same thing different taste

By MysticSoup - 21/04/2019 22:00 - United States - Carthage

Today, I asked my doctor out on a date. He had his nurse turn me down. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 068

You deserved it 3 922

Out of place

By wowthanks - 11/01/2013 19:37 - United States - Baldwin Park

Today, I was asked out by a friend of mine. He's a doctor and works at a prestigious hospital, so thinking we would eat somewhere special, I got all dressed up. We ended up eating at his hospital's cafeteria, because he gets a small employee discount. FML

I agree, your life sucks 36 904

You deserved it 7 994

By Anonymous - 14/05/2016 15:48

Today, a very attractive man asked me out on a date, and I said yes. He is tall, charming and a very good kisser. I'm sure the woman he heavily made out with after I left would agree. FML

I agree, your life sucks 12 779

You deserved it 995

It was the painkillers, I swear

By laurenh211 - 17/11/2020 17:02 - United Kingdom

Today, my husband came home from the hospital after having painful surgery, so I decided to make him a nice big breakfast. As I was taking it up to him, I heard a message on the phone. It was from one of his nurses. She was accepting his offer of a date. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 287

You deserved it 85

By Anonymous - 30/10/2009 16:23 - United States

Today, I went to a social event with a very attractive male co-worker. Things were going awesome, we were flirting and really hitting it off. Then his 'wife' called. FML

I agree, your life sucks 30 531

You deserved it 7 191

Nice dude

By ThroatSlasher - 17/08/2015 19:20 - United Kingdom - Grimsby

Today, I asked out the man of my dreams. He's smart, attractive, and has a steady job. Imagine my surprise when he accepted. Then imagine my surprise when he followed up with, "Hah, just kidding. You're fucking BORING!" FML

I agree, your life sucks 26 999

You deserved it 2 459

By Anonymous - 07/12/2018 20:00 - United States - Los Angeles

Today, after a year and half of being single, I was asked out on a date. I was asked by a married man. FML

I agree, your life sucks 2 923

You deserved it 206

By nottananny - 21/07/2009 08:49 - United States

Today, I realized why I was hired to be a nanny. Apparently the husband had eyes for the last nanny. According to the wife I am not attractive enough to be a threat. FML

I agree, your life sucks 51 730

You deserved it 3 529

By Anonymous - 05/01/2012 05:17 - United States

Today, I'm so insecure that I was still slightly flattered when the demented old man at the nursing home where I work hit on me, because at least somebody finds me attractive. FML

I agree, your life sucks 27 145

You deserved it 3 562

By Anonymous - 06/11/2010 04:40 - United States

Today, at work, a woman fainted, and an extremely attractive cop came in to help. I ended up running into him an hour later. Seeing as though I'm not very shy or a nervous person, I struck up a conversation with him, thinking it must be fate. I ended up fumbling my words so much he asked if I was drunk. FML

I agree, your life sucks 29 165

You deserved it 7 384

Next

Top comments

MissIconic 8

Monday 24 September 2012 12:06

Call him out on it later, that's disrespectful :/

the_anti_hipster 7

Monday 24 September 2012 12:07

Ouch. Look on the bright side...you can say no and be rid of him. His wife, on the other hand...not so lucky.

Comments

pdp_fml 21

Monday 24 September 2012 12:13

This man can't keep it in his pants.

sheethapins 13

Monday 24 September 2012 21:24

That's because pigs love to pork.

rekege 18

Monday 24 September 2012 12:14

Girls giving birth, shitty dads, and drama. Were you on the setting of 16 and pregnant?

Brotha_Lou 5

Monday 24 September 2012 12:15

Damn it, it's because of jackass like this, women tend to think all men are like that. The reason I can't get laid haha :(

gribbles 12

Monday 24 September 2012 12:26

Or maybe the reason you can't get laid is because your objective is to get laid?

st333ph 12

Monday 24 September 2012 13:12

You kinda remind me of the guy who sang the song "let me smang it" I forgot his name though hahaha.

fat_snooki_lol 6

Monday 24 September 2012 14:43

I'd say there are other reasons why you aren't getting laid.

Jonaykay 1

Monday 24 September 2012 19:11

Lemme smang it, girl! Lemme smash it and bang it! Good god that song sucks...but gets stuck in my head like none other

supportcommand 17

Monday 24 September 2012 12:16

Go out with him. His wife is obviously out of commission for a while.

mario2012 18

Monday 24 September 2012 15:54

You're a dick. I hope you don't have have kids in the future. If your wife is in labor, you are supposed to take care of her as she wouldn't be very mobile(I think) not to mention that constitutes as cheating.

ObeyStudKing 4

Monday 24 September 2012 17:08

Your a ******* twat. It's no wonder why 90% of women are lesbians. Jackass

walmartpaysme 15

Monday 24 September 2012 17:19

90% of women are lesbians? What? Where did you get that statistic?

igive 29

Monday 24 September 2012 17:32

64- pulled it out of his ass

Warmonger_Smurf 29

Monday 24 September 2012 18:10

Support command? Really? It's sounds like your intelligence is more along the lines of military intelligence.

ebonyirony 29

Monday 24 September 2012 18:19

He was kidding.

supportcommand 17

Monday 24 September 2012 18:49

71- thank you. It seems that most people here on FML take everything people say WAY too seriously.

supportcommand 17

Monday 24 September 2012 23:59

69- my name has no space thank you. And nothing to do with military.

MissMess 12

Monday 24 September 2012 12:21

Throw the placenta at his face!

linx468 8

Monday 24 September 2012 12:26

Mmmmmmmm

skulekiller 8

Monday 24 September 2012 20:22

Thats gross....

supportcommand 17

Monday 24 September 2012 23:57

Don't do that! They might want to eat it later!

xxjenn27xx 8

Monday 24 September 2012 12:27

thats ****** uppp

ohSNAPyall 26

Monday 24 September 2012 13:03

Too late for him to prepare for the pregnancy.

rebel_belle1974 5

Monday 24 September 2012 13:04

what a creep

flutter4 7

Tuesday 25 September 2012 2:10

Poor kid is going to have a shitty dad

st333ph 12

Monday 24 September 2012 13:10

What a disrespectful *****.

DinoChicken 3

Monday 24 September 2012 13:19

I would slap him in the face! :D

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Miscellaneous Family Cats DIY Awkward Management Poopoo peepee Work Am I overreacting? Capitalism Relatable Coworkers Frustration ADHD Dogs Animals Transportation Dating Love Health Anxiety Technology Mental health Sleep Noise Roommate Clumsy Confused AITA Parents

The Top

Today, I was walking my dog when we passed by a group of teenagers. My social anxiety urged me to appear like a cool, confident adult, so I threw a stick for my dog to fetch, expecting him to dash off as usual. Instead, he sat down and stared at me like I was crazy. One of the kids said, “He’s got more sense than you.” My dog barked in agreement. FML

I agree, your life sucks 124

You deserved it 437

Today, I was on the subway. I have fairly serious OCD, so I avoided holding the poles or handles. All the seats were taken, so I leaned against a wall. At the next stop, an obese, sweaty man got on and grabbed the two poles around me, effectively hugging me. My shirt was wet when he left. FML

I agree, your life sucks 79 524

You deserved it 6 008

The Top

Today, whenever my dad says something and I (genuinely) don't hear him, he repeats it in an extremely slow and condescending manner. My family says I should "get a sense of humor" because I'm rightfully pissed about this. FML

I agree, your life sucks 368

You deserved it 154

Today, I invited my boss and his family over for dinner. As usual, I bought his kids Christmas' presents, nothing too fancy though. This year, he had one more that wasn't here last year. So I just pulled something from under the tree to hand him. He opened it on the spot. It was my son's PS3. FML

I agree, your life sucks 12 008

You deserved it 52 248

Today, my jeep wouldn't start so I opened the hood. I slammed my fingers in my jeep's hood. It latched shut. My hood release was inside the cab, and the jeep was in neutral and on an incline. It started to roll, towards a ditch about 5 yards away. I had to skin my own fingers to get them out. FML

I agree, your life sucks 47 835

You deserved it 8 843

Today, my abusive ex-boyfriend contacted me for the first time in almost 14 years, to apologize for how he treated me while we were still together. It brought back all the old memories that I thought I had finally overcome, and made me have such a bad panic attack that I had to go to the hospital. FML

I agree, your life sucks 797

You deserved it 149

Today, after finding out that I would never be able to move my dominant arm again, I decided to talk to my best friend about it because it was getting to me. She responded with, "It really bugs me that you made this conversation all about you." FML

I agree, your life sucks 52 439

You deserved it 3 252

Today, during a snowstorm, I opened my car door to get out. The wind snapped it wide open, then immediately changed course and swung it back at me just as I stepped out, spilling an entire hot cup of coffee all over me. FML

I agree, your life sucks 29 273

You deserved it 4 374