Love: Today, after therapy for obsessing over every woman who talks...

By mental - 25/10/2012 23:09 - United States

Today, after therapy for obsessing over every woman who talks to me, all I could think about was how I could seduce my therapist. I think I still need a lot of help. FML

I agree, your life sucks 25 622

You deserved it 6 077

Winter: Snow and Funny News
Snuggle up and laugh with our winter stories, where snow isn't the only thing sliding around! More…

Previous FML Next FML

Same thing different taste

Red flag

By Anonymous - 12/01/2021 20:01

Today, I tried therapy to talk about my problems without feeling like i am harassing anyone. After messaging a therapist for over 2 hours, I felt way better and finally understood. It turned out I'm in such a bad mental state that I'm a danger to myself and others. Police were called by the therapist. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 197

You deserved it 239

So lonely

By majestic09 - 17/02/2023 10:00

Today, I’m mentally, emotionally, and physically exhausted, and I feel like the only person I can talk to who actually listens is my therapist. FML

I agree, your life sucks 662

You deserved it 161

By Screwed Up - 09/05/2013 05:30 - United States

Today, I went to therapy. I started talking about my childhood and my life. By the time the session was over my therapist was crying. FML

I agree, your life sucks 66 448

You deserved it 4 307

Objects in the rear-view mirror

By DogStew - 25/09/2019 00:01

Today, my obsession with my mean ex-girlfriend returned. It ended 9 years ago. It happened when I started researching self-help. Now, I can’t stop thinking about that selfish piece of shit. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 331

You deserved it 554

By Anonymous - 11/06/2016 05:03 - United States - Los Angeles

Today, my therapist told me to write down my goals for the next five years. After thinking hard for what seemed like forever, all I could come up with was getting a girlfriend and having an FML published. And to be honest, I'm not even sure about that first one. FML

I agree, your life sucks 13 430

You deserved it 1 729

Next!

By Kal - 19/06/2023 16:00

Today, while I was explaining my troubles to my therapist, he asked me, "And don't you have someone you can tell all that?" FML

I agree, your life sucks 787

You deserved it 118

ED much?

By Anonymous - 12/01/2011 01:04 - United States

Today, my step-mom asked if I was having some eating issues. I admitted that maybe I've picked up some bad habits from friends and school. Now she won't stop bombarding me with self-help books and therapy websites. FML

I agree, your life sucks 11 675

You deserved it 23 255

Emotional

By Anonymous - 18/07/2023 06:00

Today, I've been seeing a therapist after more than 20 years of struggles. I think I saw him cry during our sessions a few times. I guess that my inability to live my life at the fullest was hard earned. FML

I agree, your life sucks 599

You deserved it 151

By Anonymous - 26/06/2013 16:42 - United States - Englewood

Today, I had to go to therapy for my fear of cats. All the way there, my girlfriend kept making cat noises and scratching at me. FML

I agree, your life sucks 44 011

You deserved it 8 298

That'll be 150 bucks, thanks

By Anonymous - 26/08/2022 05:00 - United States - Fort Worth

Today, I’m going to school to become a therapist. Now anyone I tell that to, they now vomit their life stories to me. FML

I agree, your life sucks 792

You deserved it 383

luvtheknot 6

Friday 26 October 2012 8:52

That's...one of the creepiest things I've ever heard. FYL bro.

zombiekitten87 12

Friday 26 October 2012 8:55

Perhaps you should see a male therapist, then.

Comments

ThisisaPun 5

Sunday 28 October 2012 5:22

So, I'm not the only one?

CountryCutie90 5

Sunday 28 October 2012 10:32

Talk to a man because you obviously have mommy issues

purplecrazy5 3

Sunday 28 October 2012 17:55

LOL that's not creepy at alllll.. no offense dude but I would hate to meet u /:

xgetxbentx 13

Monday 29 October 2012 6:00

Why would you not request a male therapist? It seems like that should have been common sense....

Karsin 5

Wednesday 12 December 2012 21:54

At least you know you have some sort of issue and are seeking help for it.

frankNchunks 4

Friday 16 August 2013 21:11

Aaannd this is why I don't like talking to strange men...

inkdeath87 18

Sunday 24 November 2013 18:56

You need a new shrink, possibly male.

SunTzuSamuel 7

Thursday 6 March 2014 1:58

Or just a male therapist

epicRawrz 16

Thursday 6 March 2014 7:06

Well once Mick Jagger went to therapy for sex obsession. He ended up seducing and sleeping with his therapist.

errienneimagine 20

Thursday 26 February 2015 5:53

Maybe you should see a male doctor?

Keywords

Coworkers Work Dogs Animals Cars Transportation Art Photography Miscellaneous Videos Love Awkward Health Scams My ex Money Sex Family AITA Am I overreacting? Healthy Lifestyle Babies Kids Sleep Mental health Parents Cheating Break-ups Facebook Nice Guys

The Top

Today, I have COVID. My almost ex-wife is taking our kid to Thanksgiving with her family, but asked if he could stay longer with me (while I'm in quarantine), I said OK, no energy to argue, but she pushed and when I said, "If he's negative and has no symptoms it seems unnecessary" she screamed, "I DON'T WANT TO KILL MY PARENTS!" FML

I agree, your life sucks 225

You deserved it 372

Today, I caught my girlfriend of a year texting her ex, asking if she was enough for him sexually. He responded in detail about all their sexual activities, but she says I’m overreacting and shouldn’t keep throwing it in her face. Am I wrong? FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 693

You deserved it 205

The Top

Today, we had a meeting at work, during which I got reprimanded for "disappearing." I'm the only one who constantly stays busy, since I'm broken in a way that my self-worth directly correlates with how productive I am. FML

I agree, your life sucks 864

You deserved it 129

Today, my teacher assigned us teams in a class debate. I landed on the team that had to argue the obviously wrong point of view. When I finished, my teacher told me and the entire class how much I disturbed her, and how I reminded her of Hitler and Napoleon. FML

I agree, your life sucks 30 663

You deserved it 2 571

Today, my house was damaged by a tornado. I called my mother to see if I could stay with her for a few days. Her response? "I warned you not to move in with a man. This is God's way of punishing you." I've been married to said man for almost a year now. FML

I agree, your life sucks 46 386

You deserved it 2 996

Today, my parents decided to visit me. When I first got my apartment I gave them a key "just in case" and today they used this key to enter when I didn't answer their knocking. I didn't answer because I was having sex with my boyfriend. My parents saw everything. They didn't know I was gay. FML

I agree, your life sucks 75 451

You deserved it 30 044

Today, my landlord decided to have people visit my apartment since I'm moving out next month. She had warned me about potential visitors this week but didn't specify when. I work the graveyard shift and apparently the fact that I was sleeping in my room during the visit didn't bother her at all. FML

I agree, your life sucks 24 494

You deserved it 1 900

Today, I'm so nice, I allowed my landlady to use my freezer in the hallway. In exchange, she's so nice, she feels entitled to take my food being stored in said freezer. FML

I agree, your life sucks 817

You deserved it 181