Health: Today, after weeks of drinking my mom's vodka and replacing it...

FML for mobile
Free

By UhOh - 08/07/2011 20:38 - United States

Today, after weeks of drinking my mom's vodka and replacing it with water, it now only tastes like water. She has a habit of drinking on Fridays. Today is Friday. My life is a ticking time bomb. FML

I agree, your life sucks 11 162

You deserved it 88 971

Mother's Day: Sweets and Bummers
Between disastrous breakfasts in bed and unusual gifts, Mother's Day is an inexhaustible source of laughter. More…

Previous FML Next FML

Same thing different taste

Boozehound

By Anonymous - 26/12/2011 09:55 - United States

Today, my once-alcoholic mom told me that she would sell me for a shot of vodka. FML

I agree, your life sucks 32 887

You deserved it 3 001

By fgbh456 - 28/12/2011 00:48 - United States

Today, I confronted my mom about her drinking problems. After I blurted everything out, she completely denied it. She did this as she was drinking a huge cup full of vodka. FML

I agree, your life sucks 30 121

You deserved it 2 383

By ccat209 - 20/12/2016 04:05 - United States - Riverton

Today, my parents finally realized that I've been sneaking vodka when they weren't home. Note to self: don't let them freeze vodka that's actually 75% water. FML

I agree, your life sucks 3 678

You deserved it 9 058

By Anonymous - 03/12/2011 10:05 - United Kingdom

Today, I helped myself to a small glass of cocktail from the fridge, not realising it was alcoholic. I told my mom what happened. She made me drink salty water until I vomited so I wouldn't get "alcohol poisoning". I'm 19. FML

I agree, your life sucks 35 184

You deserved it 8 183

Hair of the dog

By shartface12 - 06/06/2014 22:01 - United States - San Jose

Today, after a big house party the night before, I woke up with a dry mouth and a pounding hangover. I took a swig from a cup I'd left on my bedside table the night before, thinking it was water. Nope; it was vodka. FML

I agree, your life sucks 25 976

You deserved it 43 655

How very dare you?

By Anonymous - 23/08/2019 14:00

Today, my drunken mother told me I'm just like my father and that I don't give a fuck about her. She's living in my home and drinking my wine. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 748

You deserved it 141

It's just liquid fun

By Anonymous - 30/12/2010 05:08 - United Kingdom

Today, I caught my mom trying to get secretly smashed out of her brain-box on booze at 8:00 a.m. FML

I agree, your life sucks 23 043

You deserved it 3 031

Glass houses and all that

By mirrorfad - This FML is from back in 2010 but it's good stuff - United Kingdom

Today, my mum got upset with me for having my first hangover ever after being of legal drinking age for over 6 years. She is a closet alcoholic in denial who hides red wine bottles around the house. FML

I agree, your life sucks 31 886

You deserved it 3 341

By Sean - 25/12/2009 00:36 - United States

Today, my parents were having a Christmas party. They went out to get the vodka in our garage fridge, only to find most of it was frozen. Knowing vodka doesn't freeze, they soon realized that I had been taking some and refilling it with water over the past two months. FML

I agree, your life sucks 7 244

You deserved it 53 833

By Anonymous - 14/09/2011 13:56 - United States

Today, I asked my mom why she drinks. She said she only drinks when she's depressed. My step-dad said she only drinks on the weekend. Those are the days I'm at her house. FML

I agree, your life sucks 29 083

You deserved it 2 772

Keyman1212 14

Saturday 9 July 2011 0:43

Yelling Douchebags Incorporated.

philtheawesome 0

Saturday 9 July 2011 0:41

what about for the last few weeks? I thought Friday was every week...

Comments

j_cat187 19

Saturday 9 July 2011 2:15

shuda filled it with rubbing alcohol.

akunohana 0

Wednesday 13 July 2011 14:18

dumbass?

RoxxyHustle 7

Saturday 9 July 2011 2:16

how is this an FML? Wouldn't this go under I F'd my own L lol.

cassidy725 0

Saturday 9 July 2011 2:19

it's Friday Friday you gonna get kill on Friday!!

thrfunnyryguy 0

Saturday 9 July 2011 2:23

I don't get it...

love_you77 9

Saturday 9 July 2011 2:27

Thumb this comment down.

mcintosh123 15

Saturday 9 July 2011 2:28

When I'm depressed instead of drinking I go to my room lock my door open my window and listen to Rebecca Black oh and I put it on full blast so my neighbor would hate me