Work: Today, as a priest's helper in church, I was giving Communion....

By sabz21 - 27/01/2014 04:37 - United States - Naugatuck

Today, as a priest's helper in church, I was giving Communion. It took me three people to realize that every time I was giving them the Eucharist, I was saying, "May the force be with you". FML

I agree, your life sucks 46 144

You deserved it 14 281

Back to school: Courses and confusion
When the campus comes back to life, anecdotes abound between the lecture halls and student parties! More…

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Same thing different taste

By zyordz - 27/06/2009 04:12 - Peru

Today, I was working at a soup kitchen with people from my church. Seeing a rather disheveled couple, I told them the line started "over there". Only then did I realize that they were from my church, and were there to help serve soup. FML

I agree, your life sucks 12 832

You deserved it 41 182

Classic blunder

By churchman - 28/06/2021 00:01 - United States - Lancaster

Today, I serve at church and had a funeral. As I greeted the family, someone asked how I was doing. Without thought, I responded, "Good to be alive." FML

I agree, your life sucks 411

You deserved it 793

By BlueMacaw - 25/07/2016 14:38 - United States - Edmond

Today, at church, I sneezed suddenly and messily into my hand just as the priest asked us to stand and greet our neighbors with a handshake. FML

I agree, your life sucks 14 667

You deserved it 2 162

Dirty girl

By Alyssa - 28/08/2019 04:00 - United States - Macon

Today, at church, while everyone was shaking hands and saying, “Peace be with you” to one another, a man took out hand sanitizer and washed his hands after he shook mine. And only mine. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 528

You deserved it 240

By Michigan - 05/02/2009 01:18 - United States

Today, I walked past a man handing out miniature Bibles on my way to class. He handed me one, commenting "here, you look like you need this." FML

I agree, your life sucks 26 741

You deserved it 4 874

Grave error

By spyrogers1677 - 18/11/2022 00:00 - Canada - Ottawa

Today, at my job as a funeral director, I fell ass over heels into the grave in front of a hundred mourners and an unamused Catholic priest. FML

I agree, your life sucks 920

You deserved it 153

Period drama

By Kate - 24/08/2023 08:00

Today, I was an altar server at my Catholic church. I wore a long white robe and at the end of Mass, I grabbed my candle and bowed to the altar. I turned around and started walking down the aisle. The woman behind me came up quickly to tell me I had bled through my robe. FML

I agree, your life sucks 811

You deserved it 118

By Anonymous - 19/09/2011 02:16 - United States

Today, I went to evening Mass. I later found that sometime between entering the church and receiving Communion, someone had snatched my iPhone straight out of my handbag. FML

I agree, your life sucks 29 269

You deserved it 5 378

Praise

By Jesusman - 08/12/2018 14:00

Today, as I helped my boss set up catering at our café, she was stressing about having enough time for everything when the DJ chimed in with, "Why don't you ask him to help?" It got awkwardly quiet as they looked at me and he realized I was a girl. Then he tried saying, "By him, I mean Jesus." FML

I agree, your life sucks 2 863

You deserved it 289

Social situations make me nervous

By Anonymous - 16/03/2023 12:00

Today, someone handed me a drink at a wedding, so I awkwardly took a sip and commented on the taste. It turns out they were just trying to “Cheers!” me. FML

I agree, your life sucks 560

You deserved it 244

BrotherTheo 31

Monday 27 January 2014 16:25

The force will be with you, always.....

olpally 32

Monday 27 January 2014 16:25

That's freaking awesome! Strong with the force you are! Hahaha :)

Comments

kohrman12 4

Friday 31 January 2014 4:31

That is the best thing I have ever heard!!!

mlto17 3

Sunday 2 February 2014 8:20

That's pretty awesome actually!

jullestrann 12

Tuesday 4 February 2014 7:41

I would've been slow enough to say "amen".

BoltTheSuperdog 22

Saturday 8 February 2014 7:20

Sounds like a church I'd want to attend!

SwaggyMcGnarly 3

Tuesday 11 February 2014 7:26

You are my favorite person!

Lovable_Hated 2

Friday 14 February 2014 3:29

Lol wtf. Hahah

darkfireflame 15

Saturday 15 February 2014 15:55

Hahaha I'd go back to church if they blessed me with that.

BeachGirl27 23

Friday 11 July 2014 10:20

Now there's a blessing I'd like to receive! Did you cover your butt by saying you were of course referring to the force of the holy spirit? LOL!

lokar_ogar 11

Friday 30 January 2015 20:25

Shows how those people were just brainwashed followers.

stormfyre 13

Tuesday 3 March 2015 5:45

**** religion. Sorry just had to say it. Jk not sorry.

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Today, after realizing just how stressful my week is going to be, I gave my girlfriend a massage, hoping for some stress relieving sex. I rubbed her for 30 minutes, then she said that she didn't feel "connected" with me and went to sleep. Isn't the point of sex to connect? FML

I agree, your life sucks 599

You deserved it 1 545

Today, I found out my girlfriend of 3 years has been cheating on me with more guys than I can count on one hand. I'm not sure what's worse, realizing this only after she's moved in, realizing two of the guys were my close friends, or realizing I'd given up my dream career for this. FML

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The Top

Today, my six-year-old got in an argument with my four-year-old. I told them to go outside. The next thing I know, my son was standing in front of his sister's burning Barbie's Malibu Dream House, singing "Burn Baby Burn" and cackling madly. FML

I agree, your life sucks 38 853

You deserved it 10 321

Today, I woke up at 4 a.m. to the smell of something burning. My husband and I checked the house, and I was convinced there was possibly an electric fire. Went back to bed, then when I woke again I remembered I'd straightened my hair the day before and that’s what the burnt smell was. FML

I agree, your life sucks 192

You deserved it 720

Today, after nearly three hours of watching the new Batman movie, I realized that the film was a waste of time and moments of my life that I will never get back. FML

I agree, your life sucks 343

You deserved it 1 043

Today, I'm at work as a security guard. At a morgue. Why am I here? FML

I agree, your life sucks 31 425

You deserved it 6 109

Today, after drunk texting a girl the night before, I sent her a message saying I was sorry for everything I said. All she could say back? "Those were some of the most normal drunk texts I have ever read. I'd hate to see how boring you'd be sober." FML

I agree, your life sucks 32 443

You deserved it 7 609

Today, during my online class, I was answering my professor's question when my older sister slammed open the door to loudly say, "WHAT'S UP CHICKEN FUCKER?" My class heard. I hate online school. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 015

You deserved it 124