Work: Today, as a priest's helper in church, I was giving Communion....

By sabz21 - 27/01/2014 04:37 - United States - Naugatuck

Today, as a priest's helper in church, I was giving Communion. It took me three people to realize that every time I was giving them the Eucharist, I was saying, "May the force be with you". FML

I agree, your life sucks 46 145

You deserved it 14 283

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Same thing different taste

By zyordz - 27/06/2009 04:12 - Peru

Today, I was working at a soup kitchen with people from my church. Seeing a rather disheveled couple, I told them the line started "over there". Only then did I realize that they were from my church, and were there to help serve soup. FML

I agree, your life sucks 12 834

You deserved it 41 188

Classic blunder

By churchman - 28/06/2021 00:01 - United States - Lancaster

Today, I serve at church and had a funeral. As I greeted the family, someone asked how I was doing. Without thought, I responded, "Good to be alive." FML

I agree, your life sucks 412

You deserved it 795

By BlueMacaw - 25/07/2016 14:38 - United States - Edmond

Today, at church, I sneezed suddenly and messily into my hand just as the priest asked us to stand and greet our neighbors with a handshake. FML

I agree, your life sucks 14 669

You deserved it 2 165

Dirty girl

By Alyssa - 28/08/2019 04:00 - United States - Macon

Today, at church, while everyone was shaking hands and saying, “Peace be with you” to one another, a man took out hand sanitizer and washed his hands after he shook mine. And only mine. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 530

You deserved it 241

By Michigan - 05/02/2009 01:18 - United States

Today, I walked past a man handing out miniature Bibles on my way to class. He handed me one, commenting "here, you look like you need this." FML

I agree, your life sucks 26 744

You deserved it 4 874

Grave error

By spyrogers1677 - 18/11/2022 00:00 - Canada - Ottawa

Today, at my job as a funeral director, I fell ass over heels into the grave in front of a hundred mourners and an unamused Catholic priest. FML

I agree, your life sucks 923

You deserved it 154

Period drama

By Kate - 24/08/2023 08:00

Today, I was an altar server at my Catholic church. I wore a long white robe and at the end of Mass, I grabbed my candle and bowed to the altar. I turned around and started walking down the aisle. The woman behind me came up quickly to tell me I had bled through my robe. FML

I agree, your life sucks 820

You deserved it 119

By Anonymous - 19/09/2011 02:16 - United States

Today, I went to evening Mass. I later found that sometime between entering the church and receiving Communion, someone had snatched my iPhone straight out of my handbag. FML

I agree, your life sucks 29 273

You deserved it 5 378

Praise

By Jesusman - 08/12/2018 14:00

Today, as I helped my boss set up catering at our café, she was stressing about having enough time for everything when the DJ chimed in with, "Why don't you ask him to help?" It got awkwardly quiet as they looked at me and he realized I was a girl. Then he tried saying, "By him, I mean Jesus." FML

I agree, your life sucks 2 867

You deserved it 289

Social situations make me nervous

By Anonymous - 16/03/2023 12:00

Today, someone handed me a drink at a wedding, so I awkwardly took a sip and commented on the taste. It turns out they were just trying to “Cheers!” me. FML

I agree, your life sucks 561

You deserved it 249

BrotherTheo 31

Monday 27 January 2014 16:25

The force will be with you, always.....

olpally 32

Monday 27 January 2014 16:25

That's freaking awesome! Strong with the force you are! Hahaha :)

Comments

DarthVader77 9

Tuesday 28 January 2014 22:02

Man, you are super!

kdenn 2

Wednesday 29 January 2014 1:39

That is beautiful!

Pensu 12

Wednesday 29 January 2014 1:57

I might actually go to church if this was supposed to be part of the ceremony.

viper8608 9

Wednesday 29 January 2014 2:48

may the schwartz be with you

KillSwitch96 18

Wednesday 29 January 2014 5:10

It's obviously a little late for that bit of advice if they posted the story on FML.

Smoxxii 17

Wednesday 29 January 2014 15:24

Hell yeah. Best sermon ever!

Waschlappen 23

Thursday 30 January 2014 2:33

This is the best thing I've heard all day!

LalaDee561 8

Thursday 30 January 2014 4:53

I love this. I love this so much.

pfft123 14

Thursday 30 January 2014 16:01

This isn't a FML, this is an epic moment! ^_^. OP, you should be proud. Strong with the force you are.

doughnut_berry 4

Thursday 30 January 2014 19:47

I see nothing wrong with that even though I to church I would have probably fist bumped you for that

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The Top

Today, I got piss drunk. Being a tattoo artist, I came to the intoxicated conclusion that I could save much more money doing my own tattoos on myself. I now have my ex-boyfriend's name permanently on my thigh. It's not even spelled right. FML

I agree, your life sucks 10 536

You deserved it 65 008

Today, I dyed my hair blue because I’m cosplaying as Jinx from Arcane. My parents made me practically homeless because they associate hair dye with "wokeness" and they’re not having that shit in their house. I'm now staying with my sister. FML

I agree, your life sucks 467

You deserved it 197

The Top

Today, while my mother-in-law visited, I asked if she wouldn't mind watching my son for 10 minutes as I had run out of baby shampoo. I came back home to see she had shaved his head completely bald. That was his very first haircut. FML

I agree, your life sucks 39 639

You deserved it 3 274

Today, I had to hide the entire drawer of kitchen knives under my bed just to keep my mother from stabbing her cheating boyfriend, and slashing his tires. This happens more often than I'd like to admit. FML

I agree, your life sucks 22 301

You deserved it 1 581

Today, my girlfriend revealed to me that she has primeisodophobia. What is primeisodophobia, you may ask? Well, it's the fear of losing your virginity. FML

I agree, your life sucks 38 247

You deserved it 5 715

Today, I asked my husband to deal with the very large spider in our kitchen. Rather than a newspaper or a slipper, he went after it with an aerosol can and a lighter. The spider is now dead, but so are the wall and cupboards in my kitchen. FML

I agree, your life sucks 3 582

You deserved it 695

Today, I woke up to the rickety old ceiling fan above my bed crashing down on top of me. I'm fine, however I am now grounded until I can buy a new ceiling fan to replace the one I "broke". FML

I agree, your life sucks 4 996

You deserved it 303

Today, my boss - AKA Satan - told me I'd better watch out, because I'm now top on his list of people to lay off next time the company downsizes. All I did was give a report to the board admitting that our sales are down this year. He blames me for making him look bad. FML

I agree, your life sucks 40 897

You deserved it 3 779