Intimacy: Today, at a party I got blind drunk and I gave a guy a blowjob... - FML

By Anonymous - 08/05/2015 16:59 - India - New Delhi

Spicy

Today, at a party I got blind drunk and I gave a guy a blowjob for the first time. I'm a 100% heterosexual male. FML

I agree, your life sucks 23 215

You deserved it 42 518

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Same thing different taste

By Anonymous - 13/11/2010 05:20 - United States

Spicy

Today, the girl that I have been trying to get with for over a year told me she was drunk and just gave her first blowjob to some guy. FML

I agree, your life sucks 32 623

You deserved it 4 799

By cumguzzler - 06/03/2009 16:14 - United States

Spicy

Today, I was at this awesome party and I was dancing with this really attractive girl who started making out with me all of a sudden. Five minutes later, my friend told me that the girl had just given him a blowjob. FML

I agree, your life sucks 68 711

You deserved it 11 940

By Anonymous - 19/02/2011 21:29 - United States

Spicy

Today, I woke up next to my best friend after lots of drinking and the best sex I've ever had in my life. The only problem is we're both straight males. FML

I agree, your life sucks 55 100

You deserved it 44 835

By kklaucen14 - 06/08/2012 01:15 - United States - Connersville

Spicy

Today, my boyfriend and I went to a party. He got drunk and started talking about how his hot blonde girlfriend gives him great blowjobs. I'm a brunette. FML

I agree, your life sucks 40 081

You deserved it 3 270

By milkybear - 15/06/2010 07:11 - United States

Today, I went to a party where I met an amazing guy. After having great conversation all night and what I thought was a serious connection, I leaned in to kiss him. He screamed, forcefully pushed my face away with his hand, and said he was gay. FML

I agree, your life sucks 44 866

You deserved it 15 889

By Stupid Drunk - 22/12/2012 05:01 - United States

Today, I was drunk at a party and confessed my love for my crush and told her how I felt. According to my friends, I made out with another girl not long after my confession. FML

I agree, your life sucks 13 070

You deserved it 49 569

Party hard

By Jason the flasher - 15/09/2018 22:00

Today, I went to a party that my friends were throwing. I had a great time and got blackout drunk. I woke up to videos from my girlfriend from last night. At some point I'd managed to take off my shorts and boxers and spent the rest of the party naked from the waist down. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 399

You deserved it 3 262

Late bloomer

By Forever Lonely - 13/06/2023 22:00 - South Africa - Centurion

Spicy

Today, I saw one of my best friends having sex with a girl at a party. It was the first time I'd ever seen a girl naked. FML

I agree, your life sucks 841

You deserved it 246

By homewrecker - 01/08/2009 13:44 - United States

Spicy

Today, I woke up from a night of crazy drunken sex with a guy I had met at a friends 23rd birthday party. The lights had been off when we had stumbled in to his house the night before. When I opened my eyes today, the first thing I saw was his family picture, complete with his wife and son. FML

I agree, your life sucks 21 075

You deserved it 64 024

By sexyfreak2510 - 03/09/2009 06:47 - South Africa

Today, at my bachelorette party, I got so wasted, I ended up giving my stripper a lap dance because he "wasn't doing it properly". There's photos. FML

I agree, your life sucks 11 305

You deserved it 51 901

Next

Top comments

anniemeece 23

Saturday 9 May 2015 9:07

Maybe not so 100%?

MegasaurusRex89 28

Saturday 9 May 2015 9:07

I don't know if "100%" is an accurate estimate...

Comments

rozdawg 13

Sunday 10 May 2015 6:34

Not any more

oliveoyle 6

Sunday 10 May 2015 6:58

so you think (͡° ͜ʖ ͡°)

sky28guy 5

Sunday 10 May 2015 7:33

Not anymore

Ashter 20

Sunday 10 May 2015 7:56

That must have sucked for you...

foxysunshine 12

Sunday 10 May 2015 9:07

Wouldn't say 100%..... sounds more like 90% to me. Gotta go with YDI for getting yourself that drunk.

BigBaby337 6

Sunday 10 May 2015 10:12

hope you did not swallow.....or maybe you like that kinda shit

davincidasecond 24

Sunday 10 May 2015 10:38

Then there's a zero percent chance you would be sucking another guy's penis...

plaukje 6

Sunday 10 May 2015 10:39

nice, or so you think you are. questioning sexuality is a good thing to do tho

Chris_D9 3

Sunday 10 May 2015 12:28

Why do people assume sexuality has anything to do with gender? Gay, Bi, Straight, they're just labels that don't really mean anything. Everyone is different, just be you and enjoy whatever it is you enjoy.

mosquito19 14

Sunday 10 May 2015 13:25

because unlike you, we don't live in a fantasy **** movie set enjoy being yourself blowing dudes.

kdmittens 9

Sunday 10 May 2015 12:36

no ones a 100% hetero... it always shows up this way or some other!

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Keywords

Miscellaneous Relatable Awkward Embarrassing Health Relationship advice Am I overreacting? Love Work Weird AITA Dating Sleep Annoying Parents Mental health Furniture Kids Gross Friends Public freakouts Fight Cops Drugs Neighbours Medication Teenagers Dogs Animals Gamers

The Top

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I agree, your life sucks 12

You deserved it 18

Today, my dad agreed to let me borrow the car to go rock climbing with my friends. He'd just filled it up with gas, which is how I realized halfway back home that one of my "friends" had siphoned well over half the gas straight out of the tank. FML

I agree, your life sucks 22 895

You deserved it 2 259

The Top

Today, I was at the mall with my mom, when I saw a little pamphlet about a charity for abused children. I showed her and said I was going to donate a few dollars. She quickly said no, calling it a waste of money and muttering that the kids probably deserved it anyway. FML

I agree, your life sucks 21 580

You deserved it 1 822

Today, I was spending time with my boyfriend for the first time in two weeks. I started tearing up and telling him that I feel like he never has time for me anymore. He responded with, "I'm hungry." FML

I agree, your life sucks 34 787

You deserved it 9 332

Today, a 65-ish year-old man told me that he's married and not supposed to look at other women, but that I tempt him. All while sitting next to his wife, who then told me I was going to hell. FML

I agree, your life sucks 24 653

You deserved it 1 664

Today, my school's theater production was canceled. Not because of budget, but because my co-star fell in love with me and asked me out. When I pointedly declined, he refused to act alongside me since it was "awkward." Everyone's blaming me for it. FML

I agree, your life sucks 28 033

You deserved it 2 837

Today, I awoke to find a water pipe burst. I frantically ran down to the basement to turn off the water to the house. What I didn't expect when I reached the bottom of the stairs was to have to start dodging the falling, wet ceiling tiles. FML

I agree, your life sucks 45 694

You deserved it 2 853

Today, I was riding home from church with my parents when my mom turned around and told me that this morning there was a demon in our living room, and the reason that demon was allowed inside of our house was because I've been watching porn. I'm grounded for 3 weeks because of an informative demon. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 453

You deserved it 178