Health: Today, at church, I sneezed suddenly and messily into my hand... - FML

By BlueMacaw - 25/07/2016 14:38 - United States - Edmond

Today, at church, I sneezed suddenly and messily into my hand just as the priest asked us to stand and greet our neighbors with a handshake. FML

I agree, your life sucks 14 669

You deserved it 2 165

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Same thing different taste

Dirty girl

By Alyssa - 28/08/2019 04:00 - United States - Macon

Today, at church, while everyone was shaking hands and saying, “Peace be with you” to one another, a man took out hand sanitizer and washed his hands after he shook mine. And only mine. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 530

You deserved it 241

By Roostermann25 - 31/05/2016 01:34 - United States - Lebanon

Today, while meeting some of the big boss guys at my new job, one of the men sneezed on his hand and then grabbed mine for a handshake. I felt every gooey bit of his snot between our hands. FML

I agree, your life sucks 13 891

You deserved it 988

By race - 18/11/2010 08:37 - Australia

Today, I was in a meeting and someone behind me sneezed really loudly. As they were doing so, I felt something cold land on my neck. FML

I agree, your life sucks 33 667

You deserved it 2 679

By Anonymous - 01/02/2010 19:29 - United Kingdom

Today, I was giving a class presentation, when I suddenly sneezed so hard I wet myself. FML

I agree, your life sucks 38 892

You deserved it 4 114

New face

By Anonymous - 02/11/2010 14:20 - United States

Today, I went back to work after being sick for a week. While I was gone, they hired a new manager. Trying to score bonus points, and possibly a raise, I went to shake her hand and introduce myself. Just as I was about to say, "Hello, my name is…" I sneezed right in her face. FML

I agree, your life sucks 26 894

You deserved it 6 450

Gross

By maddie - 15/05/2020 05:00

Today, while I was working the drive-thru window, a customer sneezed into his hand and then handed me his money. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 783

You deserved it 141

By errrmkl46 - 02/12/2009 06:25 - United States

Today, I sneezed in the shower. When I got out, I got a text from my creepy old neighbor saying "Bless you". FML

I agree, your life sucks 54 617

You deserved it 3 994

By BloodyMarry - 04/06/2013 17:53 - United States

Today, on the drive to church, I got a nosebleed. Not so bad, until I sneezed and splattered myself and my fiancé with blood, snot, and eventually tears. FML

I agree, your life sucks 51 759

You deserved it 4 754

Let it all out

By Anonymous - 25/03/2023 22:00 - Australia

Today, I was in a meeting with my boss and some new clients when I sensed that I was about to sneeze. I tried to hold it in, but ended up sneezing AND farting. FML

I agree, your life sucks 836

You deserved it 140

By HWS - 15/04/2011 05:47 - Canada

Today, I sneezed so hard I fell down the stairs. FML

I agree, your life sucks 35 287

You deserved it 7 776

Next

Top comments

katelng09 16

Monday 25 July 2016 23:10

That's why you're supposed to sneeze into your elbow.

delichick 27

Monday 25 July 2016 23:21

Agrees with the other comments, sneeze into your elbow. Do you not have tissues with you? I dont always have tissues but Ive kept restaurant napkins in my backpack or in my pockets just in case. Put yourself in another persons shoes, would you shake hands with someone who just sneezed into their hand?

Comments

Cynakill 11

Tuesday 9 August 2016 0:03

Why would you go to church?

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You deserved it 1 300

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The Top

Today, I was fired for falling asleep at work. I’m still not sure how I fell asleep, seeing as I’m a stocker and I was actively putting cans on the shelf when it happened. FML

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You deserved it 107

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I agree, your life sucks 36 268

You deserved it 12 898

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I agree, your life sucks 31 443

You deserved it 3 986

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I agree, your life sucks 29 522

You deserved it 3 241

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I agree, your life sucks 33 336

You deserved it 4 936

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I agree, your life sucks 15 310

You deserved it 45 350