Miscellaneous: Today, at my school's Midnight Madness, I was selected to show...

By skyhawk13 - 30/10/2009 05:11 - United States

Today, at my school's Midnight Madness, I was selected to show my school spirit in a contest. Being drunk, I decided to hump the school mascot in front of 300 people. FML

I agree, your life sucks 8 127

You deserved it 53 908

Thanksgiving: Turkeys and Skids
Family meals that turn absurd, because Thanksgiving is also about laughing at little disasters. More…

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Same thing different taste

By smeeagain - 21/10/2011 01:17 - United States

Today, I was chaperoning at my local high school's Homecoming dance. Outside the gym, I saw some kids drinking, so I walked over to stop them. One of them promptly spun around and punched me in the mouth. I had my ass handed to by a drunk 9th grader. FML

I agree, your life sucks 29 516

You deserved it 6 376

Nice try

By Anonymous - 23/01/2022 21:00 - Philippines

Today, I got drunk until morning at a college friend's apartment with bunch of strangers. Some officials came in due to the noise and I tried to scare them away by pretending to sing a latin song of worship I made up, thinking they'd respect the gathering if it was a religious one. FML

I agree, your life sucks 193

You deserved it 1 458

Costume parties are the worst

By Anonymous - This FML is from back in 2010 but it's good stuff - United Kingdom

Today, I went to a party dressed as a Pinata. Drunk people tried to hit me all night. FML

I agree, your life sucks 10 563

You deserved it 57 482

By Anonymous - 27/08/2009 15:53 - United States

Today, I was supposed to give a presentation to the incoming freshman about the dangers of drinking in college. My co-presenter showed up drunk. FML

I agree, your life sucks 45 722

You deserved it 5 245

By lifesucks - 24/02/2009 19:21 - United States

Today, I walked into work after being completly wasted last night. I was sitting in a meeting when all of a sudden the presenter had gotten an e-mail saying "crazy girl dances on tables at local bar". So obviously everyone wanted to watch it. That crazy girl was me. FML

I agree, your life sucks 15 963

You deserved it 50 277

By cagel - 13/12/2009 10:12 - United States

Today, I got an e-mail from my University saying I may have violated the Student Code of Conduct for being drunk in public at a football game, and now I have to go in to defend myself against charges. My lungs filled with fluid at the game, causing me to throw up. I had to be taken away in an ambulance. FML

I agree, your life sucks 34 793

You deserved it 2 776

By obsceene - 18/10/2010 10:49 - United States

Today, it was wacky tacky day at my school. I did not participate, however, I did get voted the tackiest outfit in my school. FML

I agree, your life sucks 29 103

You deserved it 8 377

Party hard

By Jason the flasher - 15/09/2018 22:00

Today, I went to a party that my friends were throwing. I had a great time and got blackout drunk. I woke up to videos from my girlfriend from last night. At some point I'd managed to take off my shorts and boxers and spent the rest of the party naked from the waist down. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 399

You deserved it 3 262

The next day hangover

By CantHandleAlcohol - 17/05/2022 18:00 - United States - Loveland

Today, I got drunk enough to do cartwheels at a company party. In a dress. I work in HR, can’t land a cartwheel, or handle my alcohol. FML

I agree, your life sucks 236

You deserved it 1 364

By Anonymous - 01/11/2012 23:11 - United States - Danby

Today, at my school they were having a carnival to raise money. One of the patrons suggested that if they wanted to make money, they should have people pledge money to make me cover my ugly face with a bag. The school got over $500, and I had to wear a bag. FML

I agree, your life sucks 33 599

You deserved it 2 728

redbluegreen 40

Friday 30 October 2009 12:06

Probably the Horny Hornets.

pawpaw_fml 0

Friday 30 October 2009 12:04

What's your school mascot?

Comments

StarElise 0

Friday 30 October 2009 14:19

FML?!! thats hilarious! you should be proud you have a funny high school story to remember other than remembering the library or something equally as boring!

just_me_tmp 0

Friday 30 October 2009 14:49

I don't think this is high school.

redbluegreen 40

Friday 30 October 2009 14:20

Mercy! My mind! Think of my innocent mind!

redbluegreen 40

Friday 30 October 2009 14:31

If I didn't know better, Mercy, I'd say you were trying to seduce me! Well, sorry to disappoint, but it's not going to work! Well... Maybe...

boone_fml 0

Friday 30 October 2009 14:56

Hey, welcome to drinking. Also, not an FML. If you're a desperate dude you just put yourself in the spotlight. Do it right and you're smoothe cruising to the bone zone.

PhillyFox 0

Friday 30 October 2009 15:04

Definitely not an FML. All the stuff that happened was on your own accord. Either bask in your ten seconds of fame or don't get smashed at events. Simple as that.

redbluegreen 40

Friday 30 October 2009 15:06

You had me at Indian food.

blastvortex 3

Friday 30 October 2009 15:23

In other words... "Today, I found out that I was both a boob and a feeb, even though I brought it upon myself. FML" Are you serious? You don't actually expect sympathy, do you? I hope you got pummeled for screwing about with the school mascot. YDI.