John Gabriel's Greater Internet Fuckwad Principle: Normal person Anonymity Audience = Total Fuckwad One of my favorites and proven hundreds of times daily on this website.

no one gives a shit. why do these posts keep getting accepted?

go get new friends???

I know right?! gahhhh

this is the worst FML I've read in a long time

I agree 100%

OR the battery died.

I agree... get out and do some shit.....

OP, your stuffed toy is feeling down and dejected, because its batteries were down. All day long, it was lying on the sofa, mute and paralyzed with apprehension. What will happen when you squeeze it, and it is silent in response? What if you wouldn't want it anymore, because it can no longer tell you that it loves you? When it saw you, it felt hopeful, and it thought, "Surely she will see how down I am, and replace my batteries to cheer me up. Because, after I've told her that I love her so many times, she will not leave me when I'm down. I was always there for her when she needed me before. She will not abandon me now, even though I'm useless! I can still serve, I can still be recharged!" When you approached, it saw immediately that you were dejected and in need of comfort. You squeezed it, and it wanted to tell you that it loved you, but it couldn't. Mutely, it sent you its love and a silent plea for help. Just recharge me, and I will tell you once again of my love! But you cast the toy aside, deep within your own misery.

okay, I read this FML wrong apperantly. I saw the " I got rejected by a stuffed animal" bit as a joke. Maybe I'm wrong, but either way you all are just jerks to her. Obviously she doesn't have the people skills, but still, being nice is a good thing.