Love: Today, for the very first time I got it on with my girlfriend....

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By Mr Eek - 25/10/2008 16:57

Today, for the very first time I got it on with my girlfriend. Unfortunately, afterwards I had a terrible tummy ache and let out a very noisy fart. I'm not sure she'll still be my girlfriend tomorrow. FML

I agree, your life sucks 45 589

You deserved it 12 449

Labour Day: Rest or Disaster?
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Same thing different taste

By Anonymous - 27/01/2013 06:03 - United States - Demorest

Today, while getting intimate with my girlfriend, I felt a sharp pain in my stomach, and had to run to the bathroom to evacuate my bowels. She heard the horrible sounds, and I doubt I'll ever be able to seduce her again. FML

I agree, your life sucks 35 059

You deserved it 3 910

Nice outing

By Anonymous - 07/12/2019 05:00 - United Kingdom - London

Today, I decided to treat my girlfriend by eating her out. After a while I thought she was going to cum, but instead she farted in my mouth. FML

I agree, your life sucks 2 454

You deserved it 778

Multitasking

By Anonymous - 14/11/2012 21:28 - United States - Colorado Springs

Today, was the day my girlfriend and I tried to 69 for the first time. Today is also the day I learned that I'm physically incapable of maintaining an erection after someone farts in my face. FML

I agree, your life sucks 54 257

You deserved it 6 809

Gross out competition

By shattysituation - 31/12/2012 22:36 - United States

Today, my girlfriend and I decided to try a new place to eat. On our way home we both had upset stomachs. As we raced into the house we realized neither of us could hold it any longer. Having only one bathroom, I let her go first. She exploded on the toilet and I exploded in my pants. FML

I agree, your life sucks 43 450

You deserved it 4 066

The trumpets of doom

By Anonymous - 15/12/2024 15:00 - Belgium - Merendree

Today, I went to meet my boyfriend's parents for the first time. While I was at their house I got a tummy ache, then had loud explosive diarrhea. Twice. They definitely heard it all. FML

I agree, your life sucks 536

You deserved it 95

By CHStennis_4 - 03/09/2011 04:48 - United States

Today, my girlfriend broke up with me. Because she farted, and thought it was "too awkward". FML

I agree, your life sucks 41 319

You deserved it 3 867

Mission successful

By Anonymous - 07/02/2022 22:00

Today, my girlfriend and I did a 69 for the first time and I was on the bottom. When she orgasmed, not only did she fart, a bit of poo came out with the fart, and actually went up my nose. I’ve gone through a whole box of tissues blowing my nose, but I can still smell it. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 959

You deserved it 304

By Haley. - 26/03/2010 23:58 - United States

Today, my boyfriend and I were trying to have intercourse for the first time. One minute into it, he got nervous and farted. What's worse is that his fart scared him, and he asked "What was that?" FML

I agree, your life sucks 40 319

You deserved it 6 541

Put the booze down

By Anonymous - 13/08/2020 14:01

Today, I shat myself in front of my girlfriend's family, after drinking too much the previous night and waking up with major stomach problems. FML

I agree, your life sucks 564

You deserved it 2 096

By pikachu - 20/01/2009 20:00 - United States

Today, my girlfriend farted in her sleep, woke me up because it was so damn loud, and my room smelt like rotten noodles for about an hour. FML

I agree, your life sucks 29 587

You deserved it 4 546

UGADAWG34 0

Wednesday 18 February 2009 14:32

she's a **** if she leaves you for that...

SillyAsh 0

Thursday 26 February 2009 23:56

I'm sure if she really wanted to be your girl, she wouldn't dump you for farting. I fart after sex and in the mornings with my boyf. It's not a big deal.

Comments

Sneado 20

Tuesday 23 December 2014 23:58

YDI for saying tummy

LoZelda123 20

Sunday 5 July 2015 19:54

That's a really shallow reason to dump someone...

GreekYogurt 26

Monday 10 August 2015 6:26

Farts are funny.

Dr_Manhattan_fml 15

Wednesday 18 May 2016 10:32

I guess you can say you won't be having Nuuun of that.

DanishPeach 8

Wednesday 18 May 2016 10:48

You don't have to stay there the entire time you're in Mexico. Maybe find a hostel - or once you get to know more people someone will know of a good place you can stay