Intimacy: Today, I accidentally walked in on my girlfriend masturbating...

By Anonn - 23/02/2009 13:14 - Australia

Today, I accidentally walked in on my girlfriend masturbating so I said to her, "Need a hand with that?" to which she replied "I'm doing fine here on my own, don't ruin it." FML

I agree, your life sucks 93 165

You deserved it 23 486

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Same thing different taste

Self-service

By Steve - 13/06/2012 21:30 - United States - Lake Charles

Today, I walked in on my wife masturbating. Naturally, I asked her if she needed some help. She replied, "Nah, I've got this." FML

I agree, your life sucks 31 811

You deserved it 17 109

By notsohandy - 03/01/2014 22:08 - Denmark - Hadsten

Today, I woke up to my girlfriend masturbating beside me. I asked if she needed a hand. She called me a pervert and now won't speak to me. FML

I agree, your life sucks 69 948

You deserved it 8 126

By Isabell - 06/02/2010 05:31 - Australia

Today, my soon-to-be mother-in-law walked in on me masturbating, in my own house. FML

I agree, your life sucks 23 770

You deserved it 5 870

Handy

By Anonymous - 06/03/2011 18:15 - Sweden

Today, my girlfriend was giving me a handjob in the shower. As I was reaching climax, my mom walked by the bathroom door and started talking to me. My girlfriend didn't stop, and in order to distract from the situation at hand, I had to carry on the conversation with my mom. FML

I agree, your life sucks 44 907

You deserved it 11 994

Denied

By Anonymous - 30/08/2023 22:00

Today, I started coming on to my girlfriend, only to get a nasty rejection. I told her I would just go jerk off, to which she replied, "Don't you dare!" FML

I agree, your life sucks 518

You deserved it 142

By Anonymous - 18/01/2014 22:55 - United States - Somerset

Today, while I was fooling around with my girlfriend, she hurt her hand. It obviously wasn't very serious, so I told her to stop faking it. She responded, "Wanna know what I actually fake? My orgasms." FML

I agree, your life sucks 39 660

You deserved it 64 583

By arctic1 - 27/05/2009 09:45 - United States

Today, me and my girlfriend were heading back to her place. On the way there, she was rubbing and stroking me. When we got there, I asked her mom for a congrats hug. I forgot I had a hard on from my girlfriend. She felt it. FML

I agree, your life sucks 20 327

You deserved it 68 710

Play it cool

By Fraser - 08/03/2012 19:03 - Canada

Today, my mother caught me masturbating. Trying to defuse the awkward tension, I said "Oh, I was just thinking about you!" Not a good idea. FML

I agree, your life sucks 17 203

You deserved it 56 647

By fuck russia and fuck georgia too - 09/03/2014 18:38 - Azerbaijan

Today, my girlfriend broke up with me. She'd walked in on me jerking off, which she said is exactly the same as cheating on her. FML

I agree, your life sucks 58 008

You deserved it 10 363

By Anonymous - 14/03/2013 16:59 - Germany - Dortmund

Today, my girlfriend and I were going to get intimate, so I masturbated before leaving my place, hoping it would help me last longer than usual. 10 minutes in, she shoved me off and started screaming at me, convinced that I've been cheating on her and practising with someone else. FML

I agree, your life sucks 53 732

You deserved it 10 557

burdenofaday 0

Monday 23 February 2009 17:32

Tip for the future next time you want to go at your girl with your hands. Have her lay on her back on top of you so you can touch her much in the same way she touches herself. Yes, it's ******* hot and will probably lead places. :]

uminuscooll 0

Monday 23 February 2009 17:05

I resent Jaywin's comment! I'm actually very good at hand jobs!! But I see where your girl is coming from! Guys are more aggressive with the whole fingering deal, it's always nice to have a ladies touch

Comments

princess90 0

Monday 30 March 2009 3:41

hahahaha woa that sux.... i prefer my boyfriend:P:P :)

SeiferAlmasy 0

Tuesday 7 April 2009 3:05

@ op: Honestly man, don't ruin it... just bask in the glory of a free show. @ 1: You could be better if you had the ex-fiancee I did, she had never masturbated... and it showed just how uncomfortable she was with sex and anything related to it.

SS_Raizer 0

Thursday 9 April 2009 1:26

Probably should have asked her if you could join in if she wasn't in the mood :P

Spartan779_fml 3

Thursday 9 April 2009 4:31

damn man that blows! i wish i cud see sumthin like that! i usually do that for her tho not this way, haha well good luck with that

firedragon64 0

Thursday 9 April 2009 6:57

#8 agreed, that is the best thing in the world.

JN226 0

Saturday 11 April 2009 6:09

#8 and #55 ew. as for you, poster person, that does suck, but guys aren't the only ones who **********. Sorry, dude.

justlikeme79 9

Thursday 19 January 2012 5:14

What kind of prude are you? Ew? Seriously now.

Ja_Ja_Jess 0

Thursday 14 May 2009 13:15

lol at #3 #9 your soo right... girls are just softer #27... wtf just cuz she wanted ta have some fun on her own.. #35 lol ... ireally wanna know what woulda happend if he did say that #40... maybe he is a man...or...maybe not... but yea... that kinda sucks for you ... i mean ...from a girls poit of vw... i kinda like to do it my self some times... BUT i love it when he does it for me...