Work: Today, I asked a co-worker if he'd cover for me while I slipped...

By davey d - 15/03/2012 16:13 - United Kingdom

Today, I asked a co-worker if he'd cover for me while I slipped out to cash some money at the bank. When I got back, I found out that when he said "yeah, sure" he actually meant "yeah, sure, I'll tell the boss and get your dumb arse suspended". FML

I agree, your life sucks 22 993

You deserved it 13 253

Thanksgiving: Turkeys and Skids
Family meals that turn absurd, because Thanksgiving is also about laughing at little disasters. More…

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Same thing different taste

Piss poor management

By God dammit - 27/04/2024 02:00 - United States

Today, my boss called on my day off and told me to come to work. She neglected to tell me that it was simply to give me my recent paycheck after it got lost, but then she said, "Since you showed up in uniform, you might as well clock in for today. The new guy no-showed again." FML

I agree, your life sucks 534

You deserved it 94

Emergency

By Ethan Sitzes - 25/06/2022 22:00

Today, I called into work because of a family emergency. My boss was understanding; my coworker? He tore me a new one because his wife wanted him to take the day off, which he didn't because it was going to be a tough day at work. He also threatened to find a way he could get me fired. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 093

You deserved it 96

By Anon - 27/08/2015 08:37 - United States

Today, I was telling my coworker that I was considering quitting the shady, 50-shades-of-scum business we work at. He snitched to our boss, who quickly fired me on bullshit charges of incompetence, theft, and workplace bullying. I guess I'm not getting a good reference from him. FML

I agree, your life sucks 22 380

You deserved it 5 856

By chelsay05 - 04/11/2016 00:53 - Canada - Kamloops

Today, I had to go to work on my day off to suspend someone. Afterwards, I got a call saying I can't suspend the person in question because the supervisor who told me to suspend them was wrong. FML

I agree, your life sucks 10 424

You deserved it 674

By Sudokori - 07/09/2017 01:30

Today, my coworker paid me back the $15 I let him borrow and we shook hands. Later, I was called into my boss's office, where he threatened to fire me for doing a drug deal in front of customers. The police are getting involved. FML

I agree, your life sucks 4 254

You deserved it 268

By Anonymous - 06/03/2016 18:49 - United States - Atwater

Today, my slacker co-worker accused me of stealing because I got more hours than him. I was called into the manager's office and interrogated. They believed him, and sent me home for the day. I guess it pays off being the boss's kid. FML

I agree, your life sucks 19 102

You deserved it 1 220

How not to raise them

By Anonymous - 03/10/2021 14:00

Today, my son claimed credit for a money-saving scheme at work that belonged to a colleague. He claimed this to someone in very upper management, but when they tried to ask follow-up questions, he obviously had no idea how to answer, admitted his lie and was sacked on the spot. FML

I agree, your life sucks 978

You deserved it 435

By Anonymous - 13/05/2013 16:01 - Australia - Mount Eliza

Today, I gave my boss a gift card as a late birthday present, since I wasn't in the office on his actual birthday. He accused me of trying to bribe my way to a promotion, and suspended me on the spot. FML

I agree, your life sucks 43 306

You deserved it 4 230

By Paul - 02/05/2013 01:52 - United States

Today, my boss called me into his office. After yelling and firing me, his assistant comes in telling him he had mistaken me for someone else. He did not give me my job back, as he claimed it would make an awkward work environment. FML

I agree, your life sucks 54 081

You deserved it 2 623

Wage slave

By Boundaries - 21/01/2023 06:00

Today, I learned that asking your boss, “Am I gonna get paid extra?” when he asks that you chip in for your co-worker-who-just quit’s duties is not an appropriate response. In fact, I was written up for “insubordination” and “inability to be a team player.” FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 060

You deserved it 143

77777771 12

Thursday 15 March 2012 19:10

He could have just said no.

WCARlover 34

Thursday 15 March 2012 19:10

Someone's looking for a raise. That sucks

Comments

reelucy 0

Monday 22 October 2012 20:15

that's why you should run personal errands on your own time. if you were in charge would you want to pay someone who isn't working?

AprilDeanne 4

Sunday 25 August 2013 15:55

that sucks, what a douche bag

makynen86 9

Monday 2 March 2015 20:42

Any personal errands you have should be done on your personal time

DonaldJTrump 6

Monday 27 July 2015 0:13

Actually no, you're fired.

Cathrin 26

Sunday 16 August 2015 1:10

To his credit, it sounds like you only asked him to cover your tasks for you, and that's all he agreed to. He never said he wouldn't tattle.

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The Top

Today, I finally decided to tell my partner that I was sexually harassed by another guy in high school. When I got to the point, she rolled her eyes, stopped me and said, "Why can't you just tell me something nice? I don't want to hear about it, it's triggering me." Well, thanks for your attention, I guess. FML

I agree, your life sucks 501

You deserved it 101

Today, my husband has been out partying all night. While my in-laws didn't ask him a single question, earlier I received more than six calls from them about when I'll be home to cook and clean. Where was I? In the office for the first time after working from home for past 3 years. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 056

You deserved it 111

The Top

Today, I worked up the courage to comment on my crush's picture. I wrote, "Cool picture" on his Facebook profile picture. Pleased with myself, I later logged on to see if he had replied. He had. Well, at least he took the time to reply, "Who the fuck are you?" FML

I agree, your life sucks 57 906

You deserved it 12 231

Today, I went to the hairdresser for the first time in the country I just moved to. Guess I don't speak the language as well as I thought. FML

I agree, your life sucks 21 995

You deserved it 2 964

Today, my dad and his new fiancée are like two love-sick bunnies. They start having sex immediately whenever I leave the house. Even when I take out the trash. FML

I agree, your life sucks 2 076

You deserved it 173

Today, my wife brought home a kitten, telling me it had been abandoned. She must think I’m dumb, since our credit card statement shows that all last week she bought it from a breeder, then got it vaccinated and chipped at the vet's, and only now brought it home to feed me this pack of lies. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 383

You deserved it 214

Today, at a Christmas party, my crush came up to me and cutely pointed out that I was standing under mistletoe. The only response my stupid brain could think of was, "Probably full of nargles though." He gave me a confused look and walked away. FML

I agree, your life sucks 33 182

You deserved it 15 066

Today, I got a call from my optometrist. I ignored the call, because I already knew I had my appointment tomorrow. When I listened to my messages later, I found out it was from his secretary, saying all of his appointments have been canceled due to him passing away last night. FML

I agree, your life sucks 24 666

You deserved it 9 284