Love: Today, I asked my dad if my girlfriend could sleep over. He winked...

By cockblocked - 11/05/2012 18:29 - United States - Goose Creek

Today, I asked my dad if my girlfriend could sleep over. He winked at me and agreed. When I brought her home, we went to my room for a quickie. There, I saw that my dad had taped multiple Richard Simmons posters to the wall, causing my girlfriend to suddenly come down with a "headache." FML

I agree, your life sucks 14 903

You deserved it 23 959

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Same thing different taste

Teenage PDA warning

By Bali_Boil - 16/01/2010 00:44 - United States

Today, I was making out with my girlfriend at her house, and her dad saw us. She decided that she didn't feel like riding along when it was time for her dad to drive me home, and went to bed. I, on the other hand, got to have a 15-minute conversation about the merits of "physical boundaries." FML

I agree, your life sucks 27 689

You deserved it 6 822

By Burntintomyretinas - 19/09/2012 04:40 - Australia - Chatswood

Today, I went over to my girlfriend's house. She'd told me not to ring the doorbell and just come in so that I wouldn't wake her dad up. As I walked upstairs, her father walked out of the bathroom naked. We locked eyes. I can't get the image out of my head. FML

I agree, your life sucks 25 846

You deserved it 3 608

By talkssuck - 30/03/2009 21:44 - United States

Today, I was hooking up with my girlfriend when her dad knocked on the clear door that leads to the room. About 5 minutes later both of her parents came in to give us the "talk" which included the first time her parents did it. In detail. FML

I agree, your life sucks 59 477

You deserved it 18 538

Method acting

By Anonymous - 09/02/2013 05:08 - United Kingdom - Frome

Today, I got permission from my parents for my boyfriend to stay over. Things got intimate, and I tried my hardest not to make too much noise. However, while having a post-sex cuddle, we heard my parents in the next room muttering about my "faking". FML

I agree, your life sucks 22 643

You deserved it 45 066

By Anonymous - 12/04/2013 09:24 - Australia

Today, I finally invited my girlfriend over to meet my oddball parents. The first words out of my dad's mouth were, "So, you're the silly girl who agreed to date my dickhead son." It went downhill from there. FML

I agree, your life sucks 49 762

You deserved it 6 945

By nahalDZ - 20/10/2012 17:29 - Germany - K?ln

Today, my girlfriend tried to wake me with a handjob. Because I'm a very light sleeper, I woke straight away and instinctively punched whoever was touching my dick. She forgave me, but I don't think her father ever will once he finds out. FML

I agree, your life sucks 25 492

You deserved it 5 327

By not picking up - 20/03/2015 17:50 - Slovenia - Zelimlje

Today, I took my girlfriend to meet my parents. My dad thought it'd be hilarious to act surprised and ask me if I'd already dumped the girlfriend I introduced him to yesterday. She slapped me and stormed out of the house before my dad could tell her it was a joke. FML

I agree, your life sucks 36 455

You deserved it 2 611

It was an accident!

By innocent - 06/01/2014 21:32 - Australia

Today, I was at my girlfriend's house, and she was tickling me. It got a bit rough, and she fell out of bed and hit the floor. Her parents, thinking we'd been fighting, burst into the room to see her holding her bloody nose. She didn't say anything while her dad kicked my ass. FML

I agree, your life sucks 62 017

You deserved it 7 504

By Crawling - 25/10/2008 16:56

Today, my girlfriend came over to my place, looking drop dead gorgeous. However, she preferred the idea of sleeping, and here I am on my laptop. FML

I agree, your life sucks 50 051

You deserved it 10 261

Not now, guys

By Sonofa - 17/05/2013 15:52 - Canada - Cold Lake

Today, I brought my girlfriend home for the first time to meet my parents. They were having a heated argument because my mom had bought "the wrong toilet paper" and my dad was angry because "she should know that he has a sensitive anus." FML

I agree, your life sucks 53 243

You deserved it 3 808

greeneye_fml 12

Friday 11 May 2012 22:24

Cockblocked by Richard Simmons.

SkoomaKi 27

Friday 11 May 2012 22:27

Troll dad always wins! Unless put against Troll mom.

Comments

MrSassypants 33

Friday 11 May 2012 23:36

TheShar 0

Friday 11 May 2012 23:37

Funny fact is if u have a headache and then have sex. The headache goes away.

faeryofshalott 25

Friday 11 May 2012 23:55

Parenting done right lol

Zachthejoker 10

Friday 11 May 2012 23:56

BURN!!!

deviltothemetal 3

Saturday 12 May 2012 0:00

FYL for the humiliation, but you still deserve it. If you want to bring a woman home to have a 'quickie' with then get your own place to do it at. Maybe that's what your dad was trying to say to you, but I have to admit, he thought of the most brilliant and hilarious way to do it.

XRaYKaT 3

Saturday 12 May 2012 0:00

That's the problem: you asked. It's better to ask forgiveness than permission. And p.s., I seriously doubt your dad was the one who put up those posters of Richard Simmons. I think you put them up yourself and forgot about them. You **** blocked yourself my Richard Simmons-homoerotic fantasizing friend.

1crabbygirl 10

Saturday 12 May 2012 5:27

You think way too hard for far too few results.

Eiregal2 10

Saturday 12 May 2012 0:01

I am honestly surprised he is still around! Last time I heard of him was the nutty professor film. so he is still alive then? Don't mock me for not knowing! Its not my fault I'm stuck in the no Richard workout Ireland plot lol