Health: Today, I bought a $450 elliptical machine to get in shape of...

By fatandsad - 03/01/2012 14:57 - United States

Today, I bought a $450 elliptical machine to get in shape of the new year. After 5 hours of putting it together, I realized that all the ceilings in every room of my apartment are too low for me to use it without hitting my head. I can't return it. FML

I agree, your life sucks 27 094

You deserved it 9 991

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Same thing different taste

By Anonymous - 14/05/2016 20:16 - United States - Dearborn

Today, I bought a treadmill as part of my goal to get fit for summer. It doesn't look like it's going to get much use, seeing as how I sprained my ankle trying to get it in my doorway. FML

I agree, your life sucks 12 529

You deserved it 1 507

Fit as a fiddle

By Dontsitsitandyoudie - 02/05/2017 14:00 - Iceland - Reykjavík

Today, I went to sit on a desk chair, which promptly rolled out from under me. This made me fall on my own foot, literally shattering two bones. I just bought a 9-month gym membership and can't use it because I wanted to sit down. FML

I agree, your life sucks 4 138

You deserved it 420

I have no idea what I'm doing

By Anonymous - 25/02/2023 10:00

Today, I went to the gym for the first time in months and couldn't figure out how to use any of the equipment. FML

I agree, your life sucks 543

You deserved it 323

By samsterling - 13/03/2016 22:30 - United States - Blacksburg

Today, I paid $500 for a gym membership after moving into a brand new house, since 12 years of software development has taken its toll. When I told my instructor about my goal to lose 35lbs in two months, he simply said, "Yeah... That's not going to happen. Try another gym," and left promptly. FML

I agree, your life sucks 18 365

You deserved it 4 211

Easy

By Aleena Rashid - 20/06/2019 06:19

Today, I bought a flatpack, easy to assemble cot-bed for my baby. I spent 5 hours building it, but when it was done, I realised I couldn't reach into it because I'm 5ft and my arms can't reach and lift the baby. I'd have to throw him in. I'm suffering from back spasms as a result, and I now need to disassemble and return it. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 758

You deserved it 387

By Inod - 07/07/2009 14:31 - United States

Today, I finally got a Wii Fit to try and lose some weight. I came home and set it all up, only to be told that I weigh too much to actually use it. FML

I agree, your life sucks 62 015

You deserved it 32 321

Having fun over there?

By Anonymous - 07/09/2024 00:00 - South Africa - Durban

Today, I went to the gym for the first time in quite a while. I was feeling pretty good about myself until I realized I'd been on the elliptical machine for twenty minutes without having actually turned it on. I was just moving the pedals and wondering why I wasn’t getting tired. FML

I agree, your life sucks 212

You deserved it 307

By Anonymous - 18/01/2015 16:34 - Ireland

Today, after the longest time, I went to the gym. I ran and ran and ran on the treadmill for an eternity, beating myself up for getting so overweight. Then I tripped and fell off, sweating and sobbing for being so useless. When I looked up, I saw I'd been on the machine for barely 2 minutes. FML

I agree, your life sucks 30 968

You deserved it 20 688

By Fred - 06/01/2009 08:28 - France

Today, I couldn't take home the free weights I'd planned on buying to start bodybuilding 'cos I couldn't lift the box, which was too heavy for me. FML

I agree, your life sucks 23 066

You deserved it 5 497

No more!

By Anonymous - 14/09/2024 09:00 - United States - Los Angeles

Today, I went to the gym for the first time in months. On my way home, my legs gave out halfway up the stairs to my apartment, and I had to awkwardly sit there until I could crawl the rest of the way up. FML

I agree, your life sucks 331

You deserved it 143

GoW_Chick 14

Tuesday 3 January 2012 18:53

eBay to the rescue!

mwrc8man94 1

Tuesday 3 January 2012 18:55

Wear a helmet.

Comments

ImInYourFACEbook 8

Tuesday 3 January 2012 19:04

This is definitely the best excuse to not exercise that I have heard so far!

WCARlover 34

Tuesday 3 January 2012 19:08

Then it technically wouldn't be considered running would it? Lol

astrasoul7 1

Tuesday 3 January 2012 19:10

sell it on ebay or craigslist

astralvagan 20

Tuesday 3 January 2012 19:11

Craigslist or eBay are your friends.....

Nanner789 0

Tuesday 3 January 2012 19:11

Figure something out. IMAGINATION.

marpay 11

Tuesday 3 January 2012 19:12

Try talking to the actual manufacture. Sometimes they will return the machine when a store won't.

hellbilly205 17

Tuesday 3 January 2012 19:15

Instead of Ebay you could always put it on craigslist, or have a sign outside your house, my parents said thats how people use to do things before the internet.

ICATiger 13

Tuesday 3 January 2012 19:23

Shuffle on it!!! :D

harbqll 0

Tuesday 3 January 2012 19:32

I guess you hadn't heard of this new invention out there, called a tape measure. YDI

OfficeNinja 5

Tuesday 3 January 2012 19:37

Double your exercise! Now you can duck with every step! Think of the positive aspect.

Livencountry 5

Tuesday 3 January 2012 23:05

Is that how ninjas stay fit?

OfficeNinja 5

Wednesday 4 January 2012 0:08

No. The true ninja needs no gimmicks or machines. I get all my exercise by dodging responsibility, pushing my luck, and hiding from work. This means I have to spider walk up a lot of walls on any given day - the best shadows in an office are often ceiling corners near the break room. Plus my job, when I am doing it, involves a whole lot of walking. Lots and lots of walking. I can be anywhere in the building, at any time, for any reason. I intentionally avoid escalators and elevators whenever possible.