Miscellaneous: Today, I bought a pack of toothpicks. There were 500 of them....

By S. - 26/08/2012 16:20 - Estonia

Today, I bought a pack of toothpicks. There were 500 of them. When I got home I accidentally dropped the pack. After twenty long minutes of picking them up, I dropped them again. FML

I agree, your life sucks 26 291

You deserved it 12 745

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Same thing different taste

By stupidtoothpick2 - 16/08/2009 05:19 - United States

Today, I spent hours trying to get a piece of food out of my two front teeth. I didn't have anything I could use, until I went out to dinner and got a toothpick. I finally got the food out of teeth. The toothpick broke. Now the tip of the toothpick is stuck in my teeth. FML

I agree, your life sucks 43 270

You deserved it 8 489

Pizza mystery

By Pick out the picks - 24/09/2022 15:30 - United States

Today, I picked out a toothpick from a pizza. This is not the first time I've had to do this. It is also not the first time that I didn't see it until less than a second before I bit down on the piece with the toothpick embedded in it. Looks like there's a toothpick assassin on the loose. FML

I agree, your life sucks 873

You deserved it 129

By Anonymous - 06/09/2013 11:55 - United States - Louisville

Today, I saw my dad pick his teeth with a toothpick from a new box. He ate the food he got out of his teeth and put the toothpick back. FML

I agree, your life sucks 43 609

You deserved it 2 893

Use your socks

By Anonymous - 14/03/2021 05:01 - Norway

Today, I accidentally dropped a whole roll of toilet paper into the toilet. It was my last roll. FML

I agree, your life sucks 937

You deserved it 221

By Ouchies - 01/10/2009 22:31 - United States

Today, while cleaning up, I dropped a box of thumbtacks, spilling them all over the floor. As I fumbled to pick them up, the power went out. FML

I agree, your life sucks 50 294

You deserved it 3 798

Noise annoys

By mandythepandy - 04/03/2017 04:00

Today, same as every other day, I had to pick up around 8 spoons because my cats love to take them and drop them on the floor around my house so they can listen to the noise. FML

I agree, your life sucks 5 554

You deserved it 1 060

By disgusted - 23/02/2010 18:09 - United States

Today, I went into my parents room to empty their wastebasket. Next to it and around their bed, I found tissues that were soaked in an unknown sticky substance. I had to pick them up. FML

I agree, your life sucks 29 453

You deserved it 3 688

By ouch - 05/10/2015 19:20 - United States - Stockton

Today, I cracked my tooth. I was so tired I put my pretzel stick in my tea and took a bite out of my spoon. FML

I agree, your life sucks 23 876

You deserved it 3 772

By flipflap - 14/06/2015 06:35

Today, I tried to get a piece of glass out of my big toe. After an hour of poking and prodding, I finally got it out only for it to fall on the floor where I couldn't find it. Not five minutes later, I stepped on it again. FML

I agree, your life sucks 27 326

You deserved it 7 122

Spice

By Anonymous - 07/04/2021 04:00 - United Kingdom

Today, I dropped some food on the floor and picked it back up, took a bite, and quickly realised it had toenail cuttings in it. I never cut my toenails in my dining room. FML

I agree, your life sucks 442

You deserved it 977

TurtleSmile 14

Sunday 26 August 2012 19:53

That's too bad. Did you count all of them to make sure you didn't lose any?

deathpotato 11

Sunday 26 August 2012 19:53

A firm grip usually fixes that problem.

Comments

simcop2387 10

Monday 27 August 2012 0:32

Were there 4 still in the box?

callous 2

Monday 27 August 2012 0:47

Use both hands.

mlnelly 7

Monday 27 August 2012 0:49

rain man

vbmg152 18

Monday 27 August 2012 0:58

OMG! I've done that! You'll be finding toothpicks on the floor for months! I hope there's no babies around!

vbmg152 18

Monday 27 August 2012 1:04

BTW, they now sell toothpicks in a small plastic container with a lid! That's what I buy now!

vbmg152 18

Monday 27 August 2012 1:04

BTW, they now sell toothpicks in a small plastic container with a lid! That's what I buy now!

samanthasalameh 3

Monday 27 August 2012 1:04

What a waste of time, money, and effort.

sarah6786 14

Monday 27 August 2012 1:28

FYL the first time, but you deserved it the second. Should have been more aware of yourself.

KiddNYC1O 20

Monday 27 August 2012 1:53

"Buy another one you rich ************."

Ambeedawne 0

Monday 27 August 2012 2:07

That sounds like something I would do :p

Keywords

Money Health Kids Christmas You're fired Work Bodyshaming Customers Fat Love Facebook Am I overreacting? Social Media AITA Embarrassing Poopoo peepee Miscellaneous Relatable Students Technology Education Mental health Romantic Break-ups Annoying Gross Ironic Argument Friends Awkward

The Top

Today, my wife upset herself by ringing my best friend to see if he would lie about where I was, and he did. Now my wife thinks I get my friends to lie for me to cover up my cheating. I’ve never once cheated. This feels like the next level up from cheating on her in her dreams, because she's crazy. FML

I agree, your life sucks 462

You deserved it 137

Today, I took my 8 year-old daughter to an airplane museum to show her the kinds of aircraft I’ve worked on during my 30+ year career. In the first 15 minutes, I had grease on my new shirt, bumped my head, spilled coffee and cut my hand. Sums up my career. Only 10 more years to go. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 472

You deserved it 237

The Top

Today, while working at my new job at a surgery center, I noticed how odd it was that the room began to smell like fried chicken. I thought it smelt pretty good, until I learned it was actually the smell of someone getting their ear cauterized. I enjoyed the smell of someone's burning ear flesh. FML

I agree, your life sucks 12 243

You deserved it 1 761

Today, on my birthday, I tried to be a good girlfriend by making sure my boyfriend of 3 years alarms were set for work on his phone. Noticed he’s back to talking to his ex as the messenger bubble had her face in it.. He was asking for boob pictures...FML

I agree, your life sucks 2 716

You deserved it 312

Today, I worked up the courage to give a guy my number. I wrote it down on a piece of paper, tore it in half and gave it to him. Later, I noticed I'd given him the wrong, blank half. FML

I agree, your life sucks 23 587

You deserved it 11 941

Today, after a childhood of battling bad teeth and cavities, I'm an overzealous brusher. I found out that I have cavities in all quadrants of my mouth from over-brushing, which will need multiple appointments to fill. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 518

You deserved it 225

Today, I had to hide the entire drawer of kitchen knives under my bed just to keep my mother from stabbing her cheating boyfriend, and slashing his tires. This happens more often than I'd like to admit. FML

I agree, your life sucks 22 301

You deserved it 1 581

Today, and for the past week, I’ve had a viral bug. Now I can handle the vomiting, the diarrhoea, headaches, muscle weakness, dizziness, fatigue, and coughing. What I cannot handle is how food and drink now taste bad. Like seriously, even water tastes bad. I’m slowly going insane from lack of flavour. FML

I agree, your life sucks 393

You deserved it 80

Same thing different taste

Pizza mystery

Use your socks

Noise annoys

Spice

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