By WTF - 16/01/2013 07:52

Today, I came home to find my girlfriend crying. Concerned, I quickly asked her what was wrong. She told me tearfully that she couldn't understand why her pet lizards hadn’t grown into dinosaurs yet, and that pet store had cheated her. I’m still concerned now, but for entirely different reasons. FML
I agree, your life sucks 42 576
You deserved it 4 355

Same thing different taste

Top comments

She obviously hasn't been exposing them to enough radioactive waste!

Yea, I found out the other day that I am infertile. I bought a pet chimpanzee and raised him and everything, and WTF? He isn't turning into a human?? Like how is this possible? I though people came from apes? Anyway this isn't Grow Your Own T-Rex. I bet the salesman just told her that iguanas turned into Dinosaurs to seal the deal on that 500 metre squared terrarium that the shop couldn't get rid of.

Comments

If you want to cheer her up, get her some Sea Monkeys. They're monkeys of the sea that look like a Dr. Seuss creation. They tell jokes and do plays, even musicals! And what do you have to do to have all this fun? Just add water.

Reminds me of "How to Lose a Guy in 10 Days". She's either acting crazy so you'll break up with her or.. She has gone mental. Either way, sucks for you!

Malicteal 21

I hope she's good looking or at least has big boobs, because she's obviously an idiot.

I said you deserve it for dating an idiot, although if she is incredibly hot, then it's probably just the price you have to pay!

Clearly you didn't choose to date her for her intellect. Why are you so upset about it now? Maybe it's time to play Henry Higgins. I can't guarantee you won't get dumped for it, but you could try.

Did she go to a school that taught intelligent design by any chance?

You must have already known she wasn't the brightest bulb in the box so, YDI! Try going for intelligence next time! Beauty fades, dumb is forever. Think about it! Do you wanna someday have kids with this moron??

Aside from beauty and intelligence, there's also character. Unfortunately, people seem to forget that. Do you want a gorgeous and intelligent girlfriend that is total bitch? Or do you want a psycho girlfriend? Gold-digger girlfriend? Manipulative girlfriend? Abusive girlfriend? Pretty and intelligent people can be evil/abusive/jerks, you know... Besides, intelligence is overrated. Smarter people tend to be unhappy. If he's enjoying his life with his girlfriend, it shouldn't matter if she isn't female version of einstein...

ideasrule 13

It's definitely not true that smarter people are less happy. I don't know where you got that from, but it contradicts both common sense and experimental evidence. Google "high IQ happiness" and follow any of the first 5 links. I'd post a link here, but I'm not allowed to.

104: 1. IQ is not "intelligence". 2. Higher IQ is also linked to self-destructive behavior. 3. "smart people are unhappy" does not contradict common sense. World is unjust and in most situations you can't do anything about it, plus everybody will die in the end. People that aren't that smart don't worry about that or are not even aware of that. 4. Intellect won't help you in a country where it isn't really appreciated.

ideasrule 13

Again, you say this without providing a shred of evidence, whereas I provided 5 references to support my point. If you can point to a scientific study that supports any of your points, I'll take you seriously.

Ignorance is bliss is not a definitive excuse for being an idiot.

Keep that argument in mind next time you decide on buying some new technology. Without intelligence and those people who sacrifice their peace of mind and happiness to ensure better socialization and integration of technology, we could all sit in our caves throwing our poop at each other for entertainment.

Do you ever get tired of reminding this girl to breathe? Wow.. I hope this post is fake because that's one dumb girl you've got if it's not.

onorexveritas 23