Health: Today, I cut my finger open with a spoon. After waiting for...

By Anonymous - 28/10/2009 08:03 - United States

Today, I cut my finger open with a spoon. After waiting for 4 hours in the emergency room, the doctor told me I was missing too much flesh to qualify for stitches. He then called 2 other doctors in to examine it. Apparently they had a contest for patient with most ridiculous injury. I won. FML

I agree, your life sucks 39 180

You deserved it 7 947

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Same thing different taste

By sorethumb - 15/12/2015 23:39 - United Kingdom - Bookham

Today, while observing a surgery, I was asked to open a glass ampule of adrenaline. Not only did I break it and get it everywhere, I sliced open my thumb bad enough to need stitches. FML

I agree, your life sucks 19 523

You deserved it 3 398

Slasher

By Anonymous - 01/02/2010 05:00 - United States

Today, I sliced my finger open because my roommate's girlfriend put a broken ceramic plate in the recycling. I was putting some paper in the bin and all of a sudden, an inch and a half of my flesh is naked to the world. I don't have medical insurance, so I fixed it with Superglue. FML

I agree, your life sucks 32 731

You deserved it 9 384

By tessisue - 04/01/2016 11:18 - Germany

Today, I visited the hospital with my boyfriend to have an injury checked. When the doctor removed the band-aid, my boyfriend started screaming and passed out. I had to get him out of the room using a wheelchair. The "injury" is a cut in his finger. FML

I agree, your life sucks 21 877

You deserved it 2 226

Not my day, is it?

By ouch. - 10/12/2018 09:30 - United States - Stamford

Today, I was washing the dishes when I gave myself a nasty gash on my leg from the open dishwasher door. After five minutes of cleaning up the blood and wrapping it up, I came back to finish the job only to drop a plate and send broken shards into my foot. FML

I agree, your life sucks 2 733

You deserved it 348

By caitywebbkid - 11/12/2016 15:56 - Australia - Perth

Today, I was cutting some paper when I accidentally cut a sizeable chunk out of my finger. I went to my car to get my bumbag (I'm a lifeguard) so I could patch it up. I then promptly got a large piece of glass in my foot. FML

I agree, your life sucks 8 799

You deserved it 815

Ouchie

By StupidNurse - 26/01/2012 21:57 - Germany

Today, I cut my finger with a knife while cooking. I work in a hospital and have to use hand disinfectant at least every twenty minutes. It hurts badly. I have to work for eight hours. FML

I agree, your life sucks 27 760

You deserved it 4 245

ER time

By sero - 10/08/2022 04:00 - United States - Denver

Today, I cut my hand on nothing while at work. It bled so much, I began to feel woozy, and everyone kept brushing me off when I asked where the first aid kits were. FML

I agree, your life sucks 970

You deserved it 131

By Anonymous - 06/01/2011 07:35

Today, I was at the doctor's getting some skin scraped off the bottom of my foot for some tests. As soon as the doctor grabbed my foot, it tickled and I accidentally kicked him in the face. During this, the blade sliced my foot open. FML

I agree, your life sucks 31 970

You deserved it 10 341

By Anonymous - 14/01/2013 05:52 - United States - Seattle

Today, while making dinner I cut my finger badly with a knife. When I yelled for my dad to drive me to the hospital, he accused me of lying to get attention. He had to taste my blood before he decided it wasn't red-colored corn syrup. FML

I agree, your life sucks 39 924

You deserved it 3 492

By zztopspinner - 14/03/2012 19:11 - United States

Today, whilst stacking the dish washer I dropped a steak knife. Luckily, I caught it just before it hit my foot. I fist-pumped to celebrate my amazing catch and stabbed myself in the cheek. My parents couldn't stop laughing all the way to the hospital. FML

I agree, your life sucks 12 710

You deserved it 36 529

Tequilamockngbrd 7

Wednesday 28 October 2009 16:07

Wow... that takes skill, my friend. That, or you've got some dangerous ******* spoons in your kitchen. At least you discovered that before it got to your mouth, right?

laughing_zebra 0

Wednesday 28 October 2009 16:06

Seriously... A spoon?

Comments

subcultured 0

Thursday 29 October 2009 5:19

if you can maim with a spoon then you should be feared.

rallychild 0

Thursday 29 October 2009 5:35

thats hilarious, i once got locked knee from standing... yup. standing. worst 6 weeks of my life wearing that brace.

turtleboy13 0

Thursday 29 October 2009 5:37

thats why your mom tells you to wear a helmet

Lady_Bow 4

Thursday 29 October 2009 5:58

1. gross. 2. what is wrong with those doctors, really? 3. how the hell do you cut yourself with a sooon?

meyanna 0

Thursday 29 October 2009 6:07

I think there's more to this story than what you're telling us, but in the end, I'm sure YDI.

elliekinslurvsya 0

Thursday 29 October 2009 6:34

I had to read the first sentence of this about 10 times before I was completely sure I had read it right. How in the hell do you cut yourself with a SPOON?

TheIrishJaneDoe 8

Thursday 29 October 2009 8:32

besad: Think Bruce Wayne, then reread the comments. And was I the only one whose first thought was "A lot of high school principals are gonna be scratching their heads over the bruised thumb epidemic this week"?!

V_Ailani 0

Thursday 29 October 2009 13:27

Hey I'm Surprised you've not cut out your tongue yet... Who knows when it will happen, being how dangerous SPOONS are !!

im_a_dinosaur 0

Thursday 29 October 2009 14:12

how do you cut yourself on a spoon....hahahha specialllllllllll

blastvortex 3

Thursday 29 October 2009 16:16

Er... what? I could maybe see doing that with a spork, but how the hell do you slice yourself with a spoon? Do you sharpen your spoon handles or something? WTF... I lol'd at the doctors. That was awesome. How much did he win? xD