Kids: Today, I discovered that last night, my son snuck downstairs...

By sadmommy - 23/04/2012 22:51 - United States - Keller

Today, I discovered that last night, my son snuck downstairs at 3am, drank two glasses of my very expensive wine, threw up on his bed, and then slept in his own vomit. My son is 14. FML

I agree, your life sucks 35 551

You deserved it 6 202

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Previous FML Next FML

Same thing different taste

By don'tdrinkthat - 03/11/2013 22:27 - United States - Quincy

Today, I came home to find my 14-year-old son attempting to get drunk off aftershave. FML

I agree, your life sucks 44 266

You deserved it 4 825

By A-64 - 08/05/2012 20:48 - Belgium - Brussels

Today, against my wishes, my son snuck out of my house to go partying. When he came home, I called him in so I could properly discipline him. While I was talking, he staggered to our fish tank, pulled open the lid, and vomited straight into it. FML

I agree, your life sucks 30 393

You deserved it 5 225

By StockedWithJuice - 06/07/2013 15:14 - United States - Austin

Today, I found out that my 16-year-old son bought a huge amount of grape juice, because he thought he could store it under his bed and wait for it to turn to wine. FML

I agree, your life sucks 49 798

You deserved it 5 336

By Failed Parent - 11/10/2012 06:59 - United States

Today, as I was about to leave for work, my 16-year-old son stumbled home in nothing but his underwear and pink cowboy boots. He threw his hands in the air, yelled, "BOTTLE SIP BOTTLE GUZZLE," promptly threw up and passed out in it. FML

I agree, your life sucks 27 935

You deserved it 4 640

By windsoffate - 09/06/2016 16:46 - United States - Portland

Today, as I was getting ready for work, I heard a noise almost like someone was puking all over the bathroom floor. When I went to check, my 14-year-old son was puking all over the bathroom floor. The toilet, however, was pristine. FML

I agree, your life sucks 12 643

You deserved it 959

By diddlebuag - 27/05/2011 22:09 - United States

Today, I came home from work, only to find the babysitter passed out on the couch with a bottle of Jack Daniel's. At some point, it seems my son had taken the liberty of peeing on her while she slept. FML

I agree, your life sucks 43 045

You deserved it 6 250

Booze gone wrong

By Anonymous - 21/02/2017 09:00 - United States

Today, I woke up to the sound of birds chirping, had a wonderful cup of coffee, and found my son throwing up rubbing alcohol in the bathroom. FML

I agree, your life sucks 6 769

You deserved it 741

What happened?

By ....ew - 05/04/2024 09:00 - United States

Today, after a short trip out of town, I came back late at night to the yard clean, the house swept and mopped, all the laundry done, and my son asleep. I was thrilled with my boyfriend, until I found him passed out, covered in spilled beer and piss. FML

I agree, your life sucks 416

You deserved it 169

Chemistry

By Anonymous - 31/03/2011 22:10 - United States

Today, while searching for the pungent odor that has been lingering in my son's bedroom, I discovered various types of juice my son has been "storing" to make wine. FML

I agree, your life sucks 32 905

You deserved it 4 584

Shame! Shaaaame!

By poormomma - 15/04/2020 08:00

Today, I found out my son kept quiet about having head lice for a week. He's 14. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 665

You deserved it 262

suoerkewl 15

Tuesday 24 April 2012 6:52

Your son seems like a moron.

vol4life 6

Tuesday 24 April 2012 6:52

He needs to learn to hold his alcohol better.

Comments

sourcreme 3

Sunday 29 April 2012 6:41

That's some good parenting there!

sharkwkrox 0

Sunday 29 April 2012 6:51

Um, what the ****.

insina 0

Sunday 29 April 2012 7:24

Your son is light wait

xMyAngelx17 0

Monday 30 April 2012 4:42

Fail at parenting.

jasonsexcema 3

Monday 30 April 2012 15:12

lock up that expensive wine. even if i didn't have a kid, i'd have it locked up. ~fancy~

diorocks 2

Monday 30 April 2012 22:57

hahaha like a boss

Isaac69 0

Wednesday 2 May 2012 7:29

2 glasses? What a pussy, im 14 and go hard (only at house parties) he neddsa learn to hold his liquor

abcd165 0

Thursday 10 May 2012 0:23

ugh I'm 14 and no offence OP but that kinda behavior with other 14 year olds are gonna ruin it for the rest of us -_- I feel like the only mature 14 year old yet...

Stoopid_life 2

Friday 8 June 2012 7:18

Did he sit like a gentlemen and stick his pinky out while he sipped it?

hiandrews69 29

Friday 15 February 2013 5:54

Seriously, op?? Want to know why your kid ***** up like that? Because you aren't parenting correctly. Why don't you get off the internet for 5 ******* minutes to discipline your kid? Don't be surprised when it gets worse whenyou don't.