Animals: Today, I discovered that my state is passing a bill regulating...

By ang3l4 - 21/09/2016 05:28 - United States - Redding

Today, I discovered that my state is passing a bill regulating cow "emissions". Basically, we need to regulate cow farts. I live in a farming town. FML

I agree, your life sucks 12 526

You deserved it 1 238

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Same thing different taste

By vetstudentdream - 15/04/2017 22:00 - Australia - Bellbowrie

Today, I found out what it feels like to have a cow take a large, flatulent shit with my arm still elbow-deep inside their rectum. FML

I agree, your life sucks 4 788

You deserved it 837

By Anonymous - 12/07/2013 05:24 - United States - Oakland

Today, I had my driver's test in rural Maine. I hit a cow. FML

I agree, your life sucks 51 850

You deserved it 14 630

Nature is healing

By kat, ACT - 20/12/2009 14:37 - United States

Today, while driving, we pulled up at a set of traffic lights next to a huge truck with live animals inside. Curious as to exactly what animal, I wound down my window to see if I could hear them, just in time for the truck to take off and cow shit to fly in my face. FML

I agree, your life sucks 27 485

You deserved it 11 675

By Wowsers. - 30/01/2010 08:47 - United Kingdom

Today, I was woken up by my own fart. FML

I agree, your life sucks 13 807

You deserved it 36 006

By abi_vet_student - 13/02/2009 12:42 - United Kingdom

Today, it was my first day working at a milking parlor. As I crouched behind a cow to put on an udder cluster, I looked up and gasped just in time for the cow to crap on my face. FML

I agree, your life sucks 46 869

You deserved it 7 088

Gassy

By Anonymous - 10/07/2022 06:00

Today, we had cabbage. A lot of cabbage. The farts are so horrid I can barely stand myself. FML

I agree, your life sucks 654

You deserved it 275

By E - 20/10/2016 19:07

Today, my office smells like a giant turnip green fart because of a sewage leak. FML

I agree, your life sucks 9 434

You deserved it 788

By fat and alone - 05/06/2014 04:11 - United States - Birmingham

Today, I figured I needed to go on a diet when I discovered I could make farting noises with my neck. FML

I agree, your life sucks 39 203

You deserved it 18 120

By nightmare ass - 15/05/2019 06:11

Today, I let out the most vile, nose-melting dairy curdling fart of my life. The sound didn’t wake me up. But the nightmare I had from how rank smelling it was sure did. My own fart ruined my sleep. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 537

You deserved it 421

Growing old sucks

By Anonymous - 07/04/2023 00:00

Today, I've gotten to that point in life where I can no longer seem to trust a fart. FML

I agree, your life sucks 673

You deserved it 153

WinterChild 20

Wednesday 21 September 2016 16:06

The first person to come up with an air purifying butt plug is going to make millions.

TXfmylifer 10

Wednesday 21 September 2016 16:24

I wouldn't worry OP, it's not like anyone can tell if your cows are "exceeding the limit" and then fine you or haul you off to jail.

Comments

Taurus_ChicKa 36

Sunday 25 September 2016 21:50

Uh...what? Why would they even consider that? That makes no sense.

WonkeyDonkey 10

Monday 26 September 2016 21:43

Oh no! Our Government just passed a law (only in my state) to fine anyone $1554 or two months imprisonment for brown eyeing/mooning/flashing your bum in public!