Miscellaneous: Today, I felt manly. I spent almost the entire day peeling paint,...

By Anonymous - 30/03/2012 01:54 - United States - Natrona Heights

Today, I felt manly. I spent almost the entire day peeling paint, power sanding, and applying Spackle for my grandma. Strutting with masculinity, I headed for the shower, only to let out a womanly yelp at a spider hanging at eye level around a corner. Manliness gone. FML

I agree, your life sucks 13 909

You deserved it 23 761

Winter: Snow and Funny News
Snuggle up and laugh with our winter stories, where snow isn't the only thing sliding around! More…

Previous FML Next FML

Same thing different taste

By Anonymous - 14/11/2010 01:39 - United States

Today, I came home to my family remodeling our (extremely) out of date bathroom. I was SUPER excited to help them get it done. I walked down the hallway and opened my bedroom door to find a huge, gaping hole in my wall and my room covered in dust. I had to sweep every surface in my room. FML

I agree, your life sucks 24 361

You deserved it 3 265

By SpideyFace - 19/03/2011 01:36 - Canada

Today, with water in my eyes, I stepped out of the shower and rubbed my face with a towel. When I looked in the mirror, I realized there had been a giant spider on the towel. Its guts and legs were smeared all over my face. FML

I agree, your life sucks 50 919

You deserved it 5 873

There's a time and a place

By Anonymous - 11/11/2024 23:00 - United Kingdom

Today, we are having work done and our chimney breast has a hole where a brick is missing. Well, my husband thought it would be funny to rig up some realistic spider leg things that would poke out of the hole next to my face. I had to wash the sofa cushion because I pissed myself from fright. FML

I agree, your life sucks 382

You deserved it 102

By Anonymous - 06/11/2010 04:31 - United States

Today, after getting out of the shower, I was in a good mood. So I decided to run around the house naked, then play air guitar while air drying, just for fun. My blinds were open, and the men in the Fedex truck in my front yard did have fun. FML

I agree, your life sucks 10 629

You deserved it 34 567

By skc - 14/03/2009 11:36 - United Kingdom

Today, I gave myself a facial with one of those masks you leave on for a while. I busied myself by tidying my room while it dried and eventually forgot all about it. I finally remembered about it after I answered the door to the postman. Not embarassing enough? I'm a guy. FML

I agree, your life sucks 29 375

You deserved it 65 057

By imfromtexas02 - 06/06/2009 14:03 - United States

Today, I discovered an enormous hairy spider sitting in the bathtub. I also discovered that I scream like a girl and pee a little bit when I am truly terrified. FML

I agree, your life sucks 49 437

You deserved it 12 633

By Anonymous - 14/03/2010 20:30 - United States

Today, while taking a shower, a spider fell from the ceiling onto my foot. I took down my shower head to wash it down the drain, and in the process, got soap in my eye and rammed my head into the wall. FML

I agree, your life sucks 22 662

You deserved it 8 343

By lateralligator - 12/12/2014 16:35 - Canada - Whitchurch-stouffville

Today, I took out my old hairdryer and turned it on. I then gave my roommate a show as I ran out of the bathroom, naked and screaming, after a spider was blasted out of the hairdryer and directly at my face. FML

I agree, your life sucks 35 998

You deserved it 4 608

Shattered

By ParkerRommel - This FML is from back in 2012 but it's good stuff - United States

Today, I was apparently tired enough to spray silly string under my armpits rather than deodorant. FML

I agree, your life sucks 26 258

You deserved it 7 136

Buggin' out

By Anonymous - 21/09/2022 22:00 - Australia

Today, I reached into my wardrobe to get ready for the day, when something hairy tickled my hand. Imagine my shock seeing a fully-grown wolf spider staring me down from a coat hanger. I grabbed the can of bug spray and let him have it. Half the can later, I now need to re-wash my entire closet. Damn arachnophobia. FML

I agree, your life sucks 838

You deserved it 421

supahcoolperson 0

Friday 30 March 2012 8:14

Hahaha yep, your manliness is deff gone. but don't worry, almost everybody loses their manliness when it comes to spiders, those things creep everybody out lol

AwesomeEDNathi 1

Friday 30 March 2012 8:11

Love it

Comments

False_Stupidity 41

Friday 30 March 2012 10:10

I don't have a problem with spiders and willingly move them along when they are in the way, but I'll still get a bit of a fright when one shows up unexpectedly, especially at face level.. I think in light of everything else you did your man card is safe OP.

False_Stupidity 41

Friday 30 March 2012 10:12

It was a pre-meditated ambush I'm certain. Those spiders can be crafty buggers at times.

FlashBurn 13

Friday 30 March 2012 10:55

A real man doesn't strut, and especially with 'masculinity' just saying. That just sounds like pathetically egotistical pompousness. Yeah, totally didn't see that spider coming either, did ya?

MamieJoy98 7

Friday 30 March 2012 12:51

Heyy you never know which ones can be venimous!! DAMN SPIDERS!!!!!!!

HairyPunisher 27

Friday 30 March 2012 13:41

Normally I'd say FYL but by using "I felt manly" and "Strutting with masculinity" in your story, i quickly lost compassion. YDI. I'm gay and I'm still the bug slayer at my grandma's house.

curlygirly1 8

Friday 30 March 2012 13:43

Amazing man :)

LaughinStock 16

Friday 30 March 2012 13:54

Lol the spider was like "I cut you so bad, you wish I don't cut you" :D

TechFire 25

Friday 30 March 2012 13:55

Wow. I've never seen the votes so even.

rodnog 1

Friday 30 March 2012 14:01

They're not so bad, and hardly even poisonous. And come on, my 60 yo mother catches them and carries them outside. That's how real men deal with spiders. If they er... don't want to look less brave than their mum...