Miscellaneous: Today, I got a call from a girl I dated long ago, who cheated...

By Anonymous - 09/12/2013 17:12 - United States - California

Today, I got a call from a girl I dated long ago, who cheated on me and got pregnant by another guy, or so we thought. Turns out it isn't his, and she is taking me to court for child support. FML

I agree, your life sucks 55 939

You deserved it 7 964

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Same thing different taste

Secret

By Anonymous - This FML is from back in 2015 but it's good stuff - United States - San Francisco

Today, I found out that my boyfriend of two years has a beautiful daughter. That's cool, except she's one year old. FML

I agree, your life sucks 38 051

You deserved it 2 887

Manhunt

By toad - This FML is from back in 2009 but it's good stuff - Canada

Today, I found my daughter on Facebook after years of looking for her after the divorce. It turns out it was my ex pretending to be my daughter so she could track me down. FML

I agree, your life sucks 53 682

You deserved it 6 294

By thatonekid - 27/07/2009 23:10 - United States

Today, my best friend told me she was pregnant over the phone. While in the middle of telling her congrats, she told me it was with my boyfriend. FML

I agree, your life sucks 70 492

You deserved it 3 550

Been there, done that

By hlewrn - This FML is from back in 2016 but it's good stuff - United States - Centreville

Today, I broke up with my girlfriend for another girl. This other girl helped me break up with her so we could date. After it was all done, she promptly rejected me and in front of everyone, saying how much of a douche I was for leaving my girlfriend for another girl. FML

I agree, your life sucks 8 116

You deserved it 34 850

By Rumors - 12/12/2013 11:27 - United States - Turtle Lake

Today, a rumor was spread around that I was dating somebody. I confronted the person who everyone thought I was dating, and asked him about it. He also thought we were dating. FML

I agree, your life sucks 52 671

You deserved it 6 108

So creepy

By anonymous - This FML is from back in 2013 but it's good stuff - United States

Today, my crazy ex-girlfriend legally changed her last name to mine. I'm getting married in a week. FML

I agree, your life sucks 57 443

You deserved it 3 861

By janae - 06/08/2018 23:30

Today, I discovered that I am pregnant. I questioned my boyfriend and he admitted to not using a condom because he thought we were just doing "practice sex". FML

I agree, your life sucks 2 925

You deserved it 1 721

Sketchy

By anonymous - This FML is from back in 2010 but it's good stuff - Austria

Today, I discovered that my ex-girlfriend, who I dated for 6 years, is getting engaged to my friend. The very same "friend" who's been encouraging me to break up with her for the past year. FML

I agree, your life sucks 40 593

You deserved it 3 193

By allocomrade - 29/07/2009 20:23 - United States

Today, my wife told me she wanted a divorce. She also confessed that she has been cheating on me with my best friend for 10 years. I appreciated the honesty, but was slightly upset considering we have only been married for 9 years. FML

I agree, your life sucks 61 693

You deserved it 3 259

By singlesoon - 25/08/2009 04:26 - Canada

Today, I bailed my soon to be ex-husband out of jail after he'd been arrested for soliciting. Soliciting an undercover cop. FML

I agree, your life sucks 40 739

You deserved it 7 152

AngelLovesDerby 10

Monday 9 December 2013 22:54

Whoa... What a Bi*ch... Get a DNA test homie!!

Vagitarian1 10

Monday 9 December 2013 22:55

Paternity test. Now!!!

Comments

fantasyworld 37

Tuesday 29 July 2014 21:12

Maury!

Solano2580 24

Friday 19 September 2014 4:46

Quit telling him to get a DNA test, he said it wasn't the other guys and that it was his, indicating he already got one, dumbasses

StickyPickles 33

Sunday 8 March 2015 13:24

I feel sorry for you sir, the child as well as she seems like a fail of a human being.

LostDN 9

Tuesday 1 March 2016 8:28

DNA test plus argue the fact she was unfaithful so you cut contact it lowers your payout

StormFlake 8

Thursday 10 March 2016 1:08

Don't worry bro, they kept it for a long time, so now the LEGAL father is the one who will do the support.

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I agree, your life sucks 14

You deserved it 16

Today, after my therapist told me I should open up to my friends more, I sent a message to a pen-pal and told her that I had asked for and found help with my postpartum troubles. She replied that I'm a bad friend for "always burdening her with my problems." FML

I agree, your life sucks 363

You deserved it 78

The Top

Today, I went to my former high school's homecoming game. A classmate who I always had a crush on looks up and goes "Brian!", holding her arms out for a hug. I hug her and she seems a bit suprised but hugs back anyway. I get up and see another Brian from our class behind me. Shame. FML

I agree, your life sucks 43 667

You deserved it 4 420

Today, I walked into my husband's office and accidentally interrupted his business call to tell him dinner was ready. Silly me, I didn’t realize his "business call" included Skyping with his topless ex, with his pants down. FML

I agree, your life sucks 3 513

You deserved it 199

Today, finally in a the right state of mind to move on from my ex, she dropped a nuke in my life by stating she's getting married. FML

I agree, your life sucks 494

You deserved it 858

Today, my brother turned into a fanatical vegan, and while I was eating my scrambled eggs, sat across from me glaring and whispering, "fried embryo, amniotic fluid" the entire time. I have a feeling i'll be eating most of my meals in my room from now on. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 675

You deserved it 177

Today, my friend posted my phone number all over the Internet, claiming I was a deranged stalker who prank called her. I was calling from my new number to give it to her. FML

I agree, your life sucks 23 168

You deserved it 2 019

Today, I finally figured out why I've been getting diarrhea so often over the past six months. It only happens whenever I do something "sneaky". My body reacts strongly to how I stress over potentially getting caught. I'm a private investigator, and I apparently need a new career. FML

I agree, your life sucks 36 566

You deserved it 4 293