Health: Today, I got a paper cut while opening my box of Band-Aids....

By irony - 16/08/2009 07:05 - United States

Today, I got a paper cut while opening my box of Band-Aids. FML

I agree, your life sucks 54 941

You deserved it 9 372

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Same thing different taste

By Chicketi - 11/02/2009 14:45 - Canada

Today, I cut myself on a band-aid box, while trying to get one out for another cut. FML

I agree, your life sucks 39 988

You deserved it 8 240

By Anonymous - 12/05/2011 07:54

Today, I got a paper cut from a 'get well soon' card. FML

I agree, your life sucks 41 515

You deserved it 5 698

By Anonymous - 09/06/2011 16:35 - United States

Today, I received roughly 50 paper cuts while I was at work. I didn't realize this until after I applied hand sanitizer. FML

I agree, your life sucks 47 320

You deserved it 6 049

By AHHH_REPTAR - 23/06/2016 04:54 - United States - Spearfish

Today, while drilling holes in "No Smoking" signs for my job, I gave myself a minor cut that would appear to most as a papercut. I then had to fill out 3 double-sided pages of paperwork. FML

I agree, your life sucks 12 637

You deserved it 1 398

By Anonymous - 23/12/2015 17:11 - Germany

Today, as I passed a printout over my shoulder to my mum, I managed to give myself a papercut on my tear duct. FML

I agree, your life sucks 23 661

You deserved it 2 699

By twnty1 - 31/05/2010 15:43 - United States

Today, I discovered that I'm allergic to band-aids. I now have a band-aid shaped rash around a tiny cut on my leg. Oh the irony. FML

I agree, your life sucks 30 186

You deserved it 4 074

By Ian Artis - 12/07/2012 18:28 - United States

Today, I walked too close to a first-aid kit sticking out of a wall at work, and it cut my arm. Laughing at the irony, I opened it to get a band aid out. It was empty. FML

I agree, your life sucks 29 867

You deserved it 2 824

By Moon_Glade - 03/06/2017 16:00

Today, at work, I have discovered the wonderful feeling of having a paper cut, with metal, under your nail, on all your nails. FML

I agree, your life sucks 3 984

You deserved it 371

By tylerlove361 - 11/02/2009 05:30 - United States

Today, I cut myself with child-proof scissors. FML

I agree, your life sucks 16 077

You deserved it 34 033

By caitywebbkid - 11/12/2016 15:56 - Australia - Perth

Today, I was cutting some paper when I accidentally cut a sizeable chunk out of my finger. I went to my car to get my bumbag (I'm a lifeguard) so I could patch it up. I then promptly got a large piece of glass in my foot. FML

I agree, your life sucks 8 799

You deserved it 815

Shock98 0

Sunday 16 August 2009 16:31

oh the irony. i highly doubt your life is ****** though...

Endymion_fml 0

Sunday 16 August 2009 16:27

Ouch. Hope it wasn't big enough to need one of them.

Comments

shnibz101 0

Monday 17 August 2009 2:36

Irony

i_is_a_tr00l 0

Monday 17 August 2009 3:25

YDI FOR HAVING SEX WITH YOUR BROTHERS AND SISTERS, HAVING A GIANT ORGY WITH THE JONAS BROTHERS, AND FOR HAVING NO LIFE. You, MY DEAR FRIEND, are a failure at life... And STOP USING DORA THE EXPLORER BAND-AIDS. You fattie.

abbydoll1414 0

Monday 17 August 2009 4:28

Sounds like you're the one with no life

adartse 0

Monday 17 August 2009 3:29

Sounds to me like you are exactly where you want to be right now, next to an open box of band-aids

moonlight_daze 8

Monday 17 August 2009 3:55

YDI for being a klutz.

partialsun365 0

Monday 17 August 2009 4:28

good thing jasper wasn't there ;)

plasticbag88 0

Monday 17 August 2009 5:34

Wow... Twilight FTL. Seriously, you tween girls need to calm the heck down.

partialsun365 0

Monday 17 August 2009 21:08

i take it you haven't read it?

Judge_Mental 0

Monday 17 August 2009 4:30

Why did you open it in the first place then?

mendomaid 0

Monday 17 August 2009 5:13

o the arony

Stevieebabyy 0

Monday 17 August 2009 5:56

Who the freak cares?! Really.

Pedestrian 0

Monday 17 August 2009 6:41

More like a cardboard cut rather than a paper cut...

bndoarn 0

Monday 17 August 2009 6:48

not really an fyl but it was kind of ironically funny.

Keywords

Miscellaneous Family Cats DIY Awkward Management Poopoo peepee Work Am I overreacting? Capitalism Relatable Coworkers Frustration ADHD Dogs Animals Transportation Dating Love Health Anxiety Technology Mental health Sleep Noise Roommate Clumsy Confused AITA Parents

The Top

Today, my girlfriend was on top in reverse cowgirl. After she orgasmed, all I heard was, "Oh fuck" and she clenched her butt to try stop, but it was too late, she shot diarrhoea up my stomach, chest and neck. The only reason I didn’t get any in my mouth was because it all got caught in my beard. FML

I agree, your life sucks 6 053

You deserved it 409

Today, my whole office is treating me like a pariah because I rejected the new guy who has autism. I have a history of being domestically abused so why should I date a guy who, by his own admission, loses his temper easily and attacks people? That’s right, I shouldn’t. FML

I agree, your life sucks 752

You deserved it 97

The Top

Today, I got promoted. By promoted, I mean, given a much harder job with no training and no extra pay because someone went on maternity leave. They've already hired someone for my old position. FML

I agree, your life sucks 2 128

You deserved it 145

Today, I had to run for the train, but because of my bad foot and limping they held the train, much to people's displeasure. No one let me sit down, so for the 20 minute journey, I stood. With a bad foot. FML

I agree, your life sucks 29 925

You deserved it 4 057

Today, I broke up with my live-in boyfriend after an emotional conversation and months of feeling neglected. He tried to have sex with me not even an hour later because he thought I was just mad at him, and "you usually just shut up about your feelings". FML

I agree, your life sucks 3 298

You deserved it 340

Today, I foolishly thought that I was alone in the house, and let out a huge fart on the toilet. This went on for a while due to an upset stomach. I later walked into the living room only to find my parents and a few of their friends sitting on the couch, teary-eyed from laughing so much. FML

I agree, your life sucks 48 306

You deserved it 7 593

Today, my boss chewed me out for leaving a work function early. I explained it was to avoid a former co-worker I constantly fought with. The boss revealed he purposely invited that former co-worker, hoping our fight would provide entertainment. FML

I agree, your life sucks 35 492

You deserved it 2 995

Today, I opened my boyfriend's bedside table drawer. There was a condom wrapper in there. We don't use condoms. He claims he didn’t have sex with anybody, he just wanted to put the condom over his hand. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 066

You deserved it 205

Same thing different taste

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