Miscellaneous: Today, I got junk punched by a midget in Sears for giving him...

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By b3ardown23 - 07/09/2011 01:14 - United States

Today, I got junk punched by a midget in Sears for giving him "a funny look." I was trying to read the price of the fridge he was standing in front of. FML

I agree, your life sucks 30 705

You deserved it 2 837

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Same thing different taste

By insomnitude - 05/03/2011 06:55 - United States

Today, I got mugged by a midget. FML

I agree, your life sucks 41 778

You deserved it 13 804

By mybad - 11/09/2014 03:57 - United States

Today, at work, a midget came in to buy beer. Not only was he almost as tall as me, he got offended when I had to card him and explain that the manager told me to card everyone, and that it wasn't because he was short. FML

I agree, your life sucks 37 412

You deserved it 3 279

By jules - 17/04/2009 17:05 - United States

Today, I was in the supermarket when I saw a little boy trying to reach for something on the top shelf. I went over to him and asked if his mom knew where he was. The boy turned around. He was actually a very angry midget. FML

I agree, your life sucks 32 582

You deserved it 57 173

By ManInPain - 12/07/2011 16:46 - United States

Today, I was walking down the street to go to the movies, when I got punched in the back of the head. When I turned around, a stranger said, "HAHA! It's punch a random person day!" When I asked him why he chose me, he replied "You're ugly." FML

I agree, your life sucks 42 141

You deserved it 4 910

By cganon - 21/09/2010 12:44 - United Kingdom

Today, I was in a store when a child looked at me and said to his mother "look at that tall man!" His mother replied "he's an evil giant isn't he, darling?" I then mimed being an evil giant to make the kid laugh. His mother slapped me. FML

I agree, your life sucks 40 696

You deserved it 5 030

By Marc - 06/02/2012 21:43 - United States

Today, while I was standing in line at the store, some guy insulted the girl in front of me as he walked past. She turned around and socked me in the face. FML

I agree, your life sucks 30 948

You deserved it 2 192

Parent #1 of the Year

By no i'm sure you're a responsible parent - 09/04/2020 02:00 - United States

Today, I got bitched out by some lady in a Walmart because I looked at her funny while she was on the phone, loudly bragging about "slapping the shit out of" her kids. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 658

You deserved it 214

By Nice Guy - 29/10/2012 07:55 - United States - San Diego

Today, I noticed a rather small man being harassed by a rather large man, so I tried to help out and break it up. The small guy punched me in the face and said, "Mind your business!" The large guy laughed and fist-bumped him. FML

I agree, your life sucks 23 714

You deserved it 5 199

By Anonymous - 24/07/2014 21:23 - United States - Annandale

Today, a customer threatened to smash my face in because I wouldn't give him a veteran's discount on a donut. He looked like he'd eaten his way out of fat camp, and it seemed the only action he'd seen was fighting his way into a lard factory. Still, he swung fast, and I now have a black eye. FML

I agree, your life sucks 43 491

You deserved it 17 977

By sociallyawkward - 19/05/2016 01:52 - United States - Atlanta

Today, I fistbumped a cashier as they tried to hand me my change. FML

I agree, your life sucks 12 699

You deserved it 3 515

StoryOfTheYear 14

Wednesday 7 September 2011 8:41

Must've made a mini-fridge joke too, eh?

kickazz16 15

Wednesday 7 September 2011 8:43

Run* major typoooo

Comments

Tyger44 1

Wednesday 7 September 2011 14:18

The dwarfs of moria should have had that anger

heyred 11

Wednesday 7 September 2011 14:54

Wow, that's some sales technique of his! No commission for him!

kiraleann 16

Wednesday 7 September 2011 17:00

This could have been avoided by a simple "excuse me".

cargaljen 8

Wednesday 7 September 2011 17:04

Probably going to get thumbed down for this but..... Oomph loompa doopidee doo.

cargaljen 8

Wednesday 7 September 2011 17:07

Oompa

miguelwale 6

Wednesday 7 September 2011 17:25

It's sad he will never be able to play with a yo-yo

limorales 0

Wednesday 7 September 2011 17:29

Im sorry but that is hilarious ;)

NDiesal10 2

Wednesday 7 September 2011 17:54

I would have punted him in the back of the head and then thrown him into the fridge.

SlaveToRetail 10

Thursday 8 September 2011 7:30

Two words: Anger management.

StuuPididiot 4

Wednesday 7 September 2011 18:47

shoulda kicked him in the face!

unillenium 6

Wednesday 7 September 2011 20:22

YDI For shopping at sears for a fridge.

leadman1989 15

Wednesday 7 September 2011 20:30

Midgets are just pissed because they can't do the worm. Axe kick LEARN IT!

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The Top

Today, I got all four of my wisdom teeth removed. I went to see my boyfriend for comfort because I was in so much pain. The first thing he asked me when I saw him with huge cheeks? When would be the next time I could give him a blowjob. FML

I agree, your life sucks 24 487

You deserved it 4 193

Today, my girlfriend told me she's pregnant and I did not take it well. She had planned to record my happy reaction for Facebook; instead she got video of me bursting into tears, and trying to talk her into an emergency abortion. She sent it to my parents to punish me. FML

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You deserved it 1 174

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I agree, your life sucks 29 992

You deserved it 2 602

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I agree, your life sucks 1 600

You deserved it 281

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I agree, your life sucks 35 304

You deserved it 8 700

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I agree, your life sucks 13 204

You deserved it 85 202

Today, I walked behind a girl I hooked up with last weekend while she was on the computer in the library. I noticed she was looking at my Facebook page and got excited. Then I heard her say to her friend, "This is the one with the smallest dick I've ever seen." FML

I agree, your life sucks 75 021

You deserved it 9 608

Today, my 8 year-old niece gave me back a Fluttershy plush I gifted her 4 years ago. When I told her it was a gift from the heart, she insisted on exchanging it for something of equal value. FML

I agree, your life sucks 377

You deserved it 92

Same thing different taste

Parent #1 of the Year

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