Love: Today, I got on one knee in front of my girlfriend. I pulled...

By Anonymous - 05/10/2014 15:47 - United States - Arlington

Today, I got on one knee in front of my girlfriend. I pulled out the ring, uttered the words, "Lisa, will you…" then abruptly shat my pants. FML

I agree, your life sucks 48 229

You deserved it 6 332

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Same thing different taste

By CombatShadow45 - 25/11/2009 22:39 - United States

Today, I took my girlfriend of three years on a romantic picnic to the park, so I could propose to her. The moment was just right, I made my move. I knelt down on one knee and asked her. Her response was "you're kneeling in dog poop." I looked down. She was right. FML

I agree, your life sucks 43 811

You deserved it 5 454

Nervous

By amelie - 09/12/2018 05:00

Today, my boyfriend proposed to me. While getting down on one knee, he farted. FML

I agree, your life sucks 2 727

You deserved it 715

Timing is everything

By -bird-poop- - 10/10/2009 12:52 - Germany

Today, I finally plucked up the courage to propose to my girlfriend of 7 months. I took her out to the park where we had our first kiss, I got down on one knee, and before I could say, "Will you marry me?" a bird shat on my head. FML

I agree, your life sucks 49 020

You deserved it 7 568

By anonymous - 02/09/2014 18:58 - United States - Wolcott

Today, I proposed to my girlfriend. She just grabbed the ring and said in a raspy voice, "My precious..." FML

I agree, your life sucks 47 778

You deserved it 9 661

By maebyf - 31/08/2010 14:48 - Canada

Today, my boyfriend of three years proposed to me. He brought me to our favorite restaurant and ordered expensive champagne. It was all very romantic, until he got on one knee and I farted out of surprise. Loudly. FML

I agree, your life sucks 43 986

You deserved it 8 369

By gutted - 07/05/2012 02:13 - United Kingdom

Today, I proposed to my girlfriend. She promptly had a panic attack and screamed, "No!" FML

I agree, your life sucks 31 952

You deserved it 2 884

Happy now?

By minime94 - 15/11/2012 06:35 - United States - Sunset

Today, I proposed to my girlfriend while we were on my couch having a romantic moment. She seemed incredibly excited when she saw the ring and put it on. The way she bolted out the door tells me I'm not going to see her again. FML

I agree, your life sucks 32 360

You deserved it 2 549

By sothatsano - 16/12/2015 08:56 - United States - Spokane

Today, I was going to propose to my girlfriend. At the right moment, I got down on one knee. As I was reaching into my pocket to get the ring, she got so freaked out she kicked me in the face. I chipped a tooth and the ring flew off, and now I can't find it. FML

I agree, your life sucks 26 464

You deserved it 1 836

Thanks, I guess…

By Anonymous - 02/11/2018 03:00

Today, my boyfriend came home drunk from town, busted the toilet door open crying, and proposed to me with a ring and all. I was literally mid-shit. FML

I agree, your life sucks 3 279

You deserved it 306

By Anonymous - 03/06/2019 00:02

Today, I proposed to my girlfriend in front of about 75 people in the fanciest restaurant in town. She told me she was already engaged, while holding up her right hand. FML

I agree, your life sucks 2 256

You deserved it 578

mrtonyanderson 20

Sunday 5 October 2014 20:20

Smooth

sarah5745 41

Sunday 5 October 2014 20:20

Holy crap! Didn't see that coming op ;)

Comments

Heathtastic 10

Tuesday 7 October 2014 7:22

never trust a fart bro

ludwig234 1

Wednesday 8 October 2014 10:31

That's a shitty way to do somebody

RayvenWhite 12

Wednesday 8 October 2014 15:21

Well that's a shitty proposal.

leoe005 6

Thursday 9 October 2014 13:03

Its a sign!!!

DanielleD93 16

Friday 10 October 2014 0:20

I'm sorry, but that was hilarious

stuckanemone7 7

Friday 10 October 2014 21:27

Sounds like a good relationshit.

Texasblackboots 16

Saturday 11 October 2014 3:51

And that is how baby's are made

allgameshateme 5

Monday 13 October 2014 5:25

I have never in my life laughed so hard at a sentence. 5 stars I feel really bad for ya hope things turned out well in the end op!

unicornluver3173 13

Tuesday 21 October 2014 19:40

Mother Nature telling you it ain't time yet.

paolino_fml 18

Saturday 1 November 2014 21:01

Hey, shit happens.

Keywords

Awkward Lonely Love Party Cars ADHD Transportation Ironic Vacation Work Mental health Accident Miscellaneous Grandparents Annoying Covid Health Kids Shopping Cute Coworkers Dogs Animals Photography Art Videos Exhausted Sex Intimacy Money

The Top

Today, at work at an OB office, I heard a ruckus in the hallway before a very large woman burst into my room and tried to attack my very pregnant patient. Crazy lady is the wife of the pregnant lady’s baby daddy, who is nowhere to be found. I don’t get paid enough for this shit. FML

I agree, your life sucks 498

You deserved it 64

Today, I finally met my dream woman: a smokin’ hot green-eyed petite redhead. Or so I thought. I met her online and “she” turned out to be a 22 year-old guy trolling me. The worst part is that I separated from my wife for this girl. She won’t take me back no matter how much I beg and plead. FML

I agree, your life sucks 127

You deserved it 4 080

The Top

Today, I found a bug under my foreskin. FML

I agree, your life sucks 34 596

You deserved it 22 043

Today, my husband refuses to stop answering my phone calls with, "Haaaaail Satan!" FML

I agree, your life sucks 4 085

You deserved it 617

Today, it's my birthday. My children decided to make me "breakfast in bed", only to end up setting the kitchen on fire. FML

I agree, your life sucks 11 621

You deserved it 1 302

Today, I was standing at our fence welcoming our new neighbors as they moved in. My 85-pound boxer thought it would be a good idea to start sprinting along the fence line so their dog would join in. He crashed into my right knee at full speed. I now have a sprained and/or torn MCL and PCL. FML

I agree, your life sucks 839

You deserved it 170

Today, my roommate showed me a video of a cockroach crawling all over my face while I was asleep in the lounge. FML

I agree, your life sucks 52 429

You deserved it 4 377

Today, I have a UTI. After taking some sample medicine my doctor gave to me, I had a lot of back pain and nausea. I also spent 6 hours in the ER with no health insurance because I thought I was urinating blood. Nope, "peeing red" is just a little side-effect my doctor forgot to inform me of. FML

I agree, your life sucks 33 220

You deserved it 4 562