Intimacy: Today, I had a wet dream. The problem was that I was dreaming... - FML

By damnit - 16/10/2009 17:27 - United States

Spicy

Today, I had a wet dream. The problem was that I was dreaming about watching porn. I can't even get laid in my dreams. FML

I agree, your life sucks 25 719

You deserved it 4 273

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Same thing different taste

No kinkshaming on FML

By Anonymous - 31/07/2013 16:28 - Belgium - Ieper

Spicy

Today, I had my first wet dream. I woke up sweating and soaking wet. Too bad I dreamed about having intense sex with a cardboard box. FML

I agree, your life sucks 59 708

You deserved it 9 335

By Ryan - 11/06/2011 14:24 - United States

Spicy

Today, I dreamed that I was making out with a cute girl. Just as I was about to take it to the next level, she suddenly burst into tears and said, "I'm sorry, I can't do this." I can't even get laid in my dreams. FML

I agree, your life sucks 60 298

You deserved it 7 471

Inactive

By inbogota - 06/03/2021 15:30 - Colombia

Spicy

Today, I had the most action in months when I woke up to a wet dream. I'm married, I guess that tells you all about my sex life. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 000

You deserved it 163

By margelover - 11/10/2011 19:06 - Denmark

Spicy

Today, I woke up after having a wet dream about Marge Simpson. I really need to get laid. FML

I agree, your life sucks 39 132

You deserved it 9 045

By Anonymous - 17/01/2016 18:41 - United States - Valparaiso

Spicy

Today, I was having a wet dream and had a pretty vivid imagination. I ended up thrusting so hard that it showed up in reality. I literally humped so hard that I woke myself up. Not only that, but I was sleeping on the living room floor so my roommates saw and now it's their joke of the day. FML

I agree, your life sucks 24 711

You deserved it 3 993

I'm so hot and lonely

By lonely dreams - 01/01/2013 17:26 - United States - Reno

Spicy

Today, I have been single and out of the game for so long that instead of having real wet dreams, I now dream about jacking off. FML

I agree, your life sucks 41 405

You deserved it 6 798

By Dead_Fox - 21/11/2012 05:48 - United States - Jonesboro

Spicy

Today, I had a sex dream, which I interrupted by having an OCD-induced panic attack because apparently we weren't using protection. My brain won't even let me enjoy the fantasy action I get in my sleep. FML

I agree, your life sucks 34 880

You deserved it 3 890

Unfulfilled

By Anonymous - 28/03/2021 00:00 - Romania - Campina

Spicy

Today, my alarm rang just as I was about to have a wet dream with my husband. This is the closest I got to having sex in weeks. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 071

You deserved it 155

By jakeeey - 18/01/2013 01:16 - Canada - Brampton

Spicy

Today, I realized that I'm so depressed that I can't even watch porn without getting upset about how I can't get laid. FML

I agree, your life sucks 40 191

You deserved it 10 935

By lonerjik - 19/01/2011 12:05 - United States

Spicy

Today, while I was sleeping I heard my girlfriend moaning. She was seemed to be having a wet dream. She moaned more in her dream than when having sex with me. FML

I agree, your life sucks 30 279

You deserved it 10 830

Next

Top comments

n1rvanat1zed 0

Friday 16 October 2009 23:19

Your dreams are saving on your electricity bill, how is this a FML? I understand the whole "not being able to get laid" thing, but look at the brightside!

perdix 29

Saturday 17 October 2009 0:18

At least your dream was related to sex. It would have been weird if you woke up covered in your own baby batter after dreaming about NASCAR, fishing or power tools.

Comments

Aj_teh_cool 0

Saturday 17 October 2009 21:52

maybe you watch **** of girls masturbating? that would explain, you never seem the real deal.

H4rdstylefre4k 0

Sunday 18 October 2009 12:14

hahha i've experienced the same thing XD

stayinalive 0

Monday 19 October 2009 5:51

dude please get laid...you can pay for these things now

Villa3L 0

Tuesday 20 October 2009 4:43

Awe ... Hahahah... Oh Boyy

lifesuxxx1 0

Thursday 26 November 2009 21:32

hahahah man that is soo funny.. u can first try thinking of kissing ugly girls.. its easier than aiming for hot chicks even in ur dreams lol

BaBiiSpAnKy821 0

Saturday 28 November 2009 7:16

thts so funny... my step mom didnt loose her vcard till 40 no worries broo

kylerzonca1 0

Wednesday 9 December 2009 1:48

wow, sorry to say this but, that sux

Secret_Life_24 0

Wednesday 6 January 2010 21:25

wow you poor sun-uf-ah-bitch

icpfandom 0

Monday 11 January 2010 1:00

lmfao that's hilarious

ironmaneddie 0

Tuesday 19 January 2010 22:00

Dude put the local cheap hooker's number on your speedial.. She doesnt need to be hot but just enough to keep u from dreaming of bacon

Keywords

Break-ups Love Christmas Poopoo peepee Gross Miscellaneous Argument Ironic Awkward Friends Cute Haircut Relatable Work Cars You're fired Health Covid Cheating Jealousy Kids Parenting Family DIY Cats Roommate Sex Intimacy Am I overreacting? Management

The Top

Today, I was upset after my boyfriend and I broke up. My best friend heard and told me she would be right over. Three hours of waiting later, she stumbles in wasted. She had been at the bar, with my ex, making sure he was okay. For me, I just got a list of all the drinks she had that night. FML

I agree, your life sucks 28 084

You deserved it 2 489

Today, I went to get the vaccination my college requires of all students. The nurse looked at my charts and told me there was good and bad news. The good news was that I didn't need the shot. The bad news was I needed four others. Now, both of my arms are swollen enough to make Popeye proud. FML

I agree, your life sucks 28 490

You deserved it 3 816

The Top

Today, I was met with an unfortunate clerical error, receiving a letter from WIC with a cheery handwritten note instructing me to call when the baby arrives. I guess they forgot I was there four months ago to discuss the changes in benefits after a miscarriage. FML

I agree, your life sucks 12 184

You deserved it 776

Today, my boyfriend went down on me for the first time. He definitely killed the mood when, while down there, he started saying, "Nomnomnomnom." FML

I agree, your life sucks 39 093

You deserved it 5 623

Today, I was walking down the street when a "homeless" man asked for money. I gave him a dollar and he got up and called his friend on an iPhone. FML

I agree, your life sucks 47 046

You deserved it 8 327

Today, my dad came home drunk and called me hot. FML

I agree, your life sucks 55 729

You deserved it 5 789

Today, I had sex with my boyfriend. Right after, he left the room and went to the bathroom to throw up. FML

I agree, your life sucks 35 497

You deserved it 5 227

Today, I bought a laptop so that I could have dirty video chats with my internet girlfriend. I got home only to find that the only place I can get a decent wifi signal is in front of my mom's room. FML

I agree, your life sucks 9 618

You deserved it 24 212