Love: Today, I had my first real meeting with my girlfriend's parents....

By Brian - 04/05/2009 23:27 - United States

Today, I had my first real meeting with my girlfriend's parents. We had dinner at a pretty upscale restaurant and everything was going great. When the check came, I offered to pay and I stood up to take out my wallet. When I opened it, 3 condoms fell out on the table in front of them. FML

I agree, your life sucks 21 545

You deserved it 64 571

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Same thing different taste

By Otherguy - 18/11/2008 07:36 - France

Today, I was at a restaurant with a girl I like, and as I was getting my wallet out, I dropped a condom. She didn't see anything, and I didn't dare pick it up in case I drew attention to the "object". The waiter walked past, picked up, and held it out to me with a huge grin. FML

I agree, your life sucks 36 976

You deserved it 9 414

By Anonymous - 01/05/2011 05:50 - United States

Today, I wanted to take my girlfriend to a nice dinner before prom. Her parents followed her in, and joined us to "keep an eye on me." They interrupted all our conversations, ate an expensive meal, then got up and walked out when the waitress brought the $95 check, leaving me to pay for it. FML

I agree, your life sucks 59 722

You deserved it 4 481

By Anonymous - 24/06/2013 20:26 - United States - Houston

Today, I took my girlfriend of nearly 2 years out to dinner so I could propose. When the waiter brought the check, I caused a bit of a scene to get everyone's attention. When I got on my knee and proposed, she said no and asked if I could hurry up and pay, because she was embarrassed. FML

I agree, your life sucks 62 751

You deserved it 18 313

By mark - 05/03/2012 22:55 - United Kingdom

Today, I took my girlfriend out to a nice restaurant for our anniversary. Mid-way through the meal, a guy at the table across left for the restroom. My girlfriend reached over and swiped the guy's wallet from the table. My gonads went AWOL, and I couldn't even bring myself to call her out on it. FML

I agree, your life sucks 10 217

You deserved it 29 163

First impressions

By medik - 23/02/2010 12:51 - United States

Today, I went over to my girlfriend's parents house for dinner. This was the first time I was meeting them, so I bought a $70 bottle of red wine to try and impress them. I tried to be smooth while popping the cork. I did, but the bottle slipped and red wine poured onto their white carpet. FML

I agree, your life sucks 29 970

You deserved it 8 214

Not now, guys

By Sonofa - 17/05/2013 15:52 - Canada - Cold Lake

Today, I brought my girlfriend home for the first time to meet my parents. They were having a heated argument because my mom had bought "the wrong toilet paper" and my dad was angry because "she should know that he has a sensitive anus." FML

I agree, your life sucks 53 240

You deserved it 3 805

Good one

By bf. - 19/12/2013 02:59 - Canada - London

Today, I met my girlfriend's parents for the first time. Dinner was going well until her dad secretly fed the asparagus to the dog under the table, and then "discovered" what a childish thing I had done. My girlfriend believed him. FML

I agree, your life sucks 43 225

You deserved it 3 001

By waterspike - 29/01/2010 13:18 - France

Today, after finally getting a date with the girl I like, she invited her new boyfriend along as well. I ended up paying for their first date. FML

I agree, your life sucks 32 795

You deserved it 9 976

By BrokeAsAJoke - 29/03/2009 13:38 - United States

Today, I got a chance to have dinner and a movie with a girl I've liked for a while. I ran late, so in a hurry to make the movie, and trying to be smooth for her, I told the waiter I'd "take care of him" if he made it fast. He did. When he brought the check, I realized I had forgotten my wallet. FML

I agree, your life sucks 21 298

You deserved it 64 275

By totallyembarassed - 07/07/2012 04:08 - United States - Charlotte

Today, when I went to pay for my groceries, I accidentally handed the cashier a condom instead of my $20. FML

I agree, your life sucks 13 001

You deserved it 28 773

24788 6

Tuesday 5 May 2009 9:07

Who put those condoms in my wallet?

imintheair 0

Tuesday 5 May 2009 9:13

ydi, for not listening to your high school sex ed teacher when they told you that keeping condoms in your wallet can cause them to be exposed to higher temperatures and/or weird conditions that affect their effectiveness.

Comments

ilovemycats 0

Friday 8 May 2009 8:56

Were you expecting a quickie before, during and after the meal? Three is kind of a lot... Why don't you just keep them at home? Do you have a lot of sex at unexpected times and places? o.O

SheysRebellion 0

Saturday 9 May 2009 6:45

That's what you get for keeping condoms in your wallet dumbass.

JonReb 0

Sunday 10 May 2009 11:17

You keep condoms in your wallet, read that back to yourself.

winfre213 0

Monday 11 May 2009 1:31

3? That's kind of a lot for random sex...

Truffles 0

Tuesday 19 May 2009 3:50

Doooont keep them in your wallet or they'll rip. Bad bad bad.

nirvan5a 1

Sunday 7 June 2009 10:39

LOL, man, put them in Ur pocket at least.

whiteblackman 0

Saturday 27 June 2009 10:44

how random is ur sex tht u keep condoms in ur f-ing wallet? and even then, 3? seriously i highly doubt ur THAT awesome bro. thts wat u get for sex b4 marriage....save it for jesus lol jk but seriously, find a better place to put em than ur wallet. like ur pocket how SMART guys do. im 16. and u just got pwned.

FlyingTomato7 0

Wednesday 16 September 2009 2:45

..........You keep your condoms in your wallet? Wtf...

eddles 0

Tuesday 9 February 2010 3:36

I don't get why people put condoms on there wallet, where it can fall out! try a deep pocket

Janessa95 0

Thursday 18 March 2010 3:00

That sucks for you. And you know that keeping condoms in your wallet makes them expire faster and or it might break from using it and it being exposed to different weather. Just Saying. :P