By Anonymous - 18/07/2012 16:09 - United Kingdom - Darlington

Today, I had the contraceptive implant removed from my arm after having had it in for three years. I was one of the unlucky people whose body sticks to it. It took half an hour to cut and pull a tiny little stick out of my arm. FML
I agree, your life sucks 22 462
You deserved it 2 718

Same thing different taste

Top comments

And now I'm suddenly scared of having mine out.

I can't tell if "sticks to it" was planned or not considering t was a stick

Comments

That's EXACTLY what happened to me today!!!! That crap hurts now.

All this tells me is that the person removing it doesn't have a goddamned clue what s/he is doing. Even with some tissue ingrowth, it should take no more than 5 minutes. Unless your doctor has hands of stone. If you don't know what you're doing, don't ******* do it.

DrumMajor 5

Oh thank goodness! I have the same thing OP has and I thought "Oh God, I hope this doesn't happen to me".

styphon 5

It may have traveled. Sometimes Norplant/implanon will migrate and be much harder to remove.

Shoulda had DocBastard working on you. He'd get you fixed up

And make sure the contraceptive actually worked.. That dirty bastard..

unknown_user5566 26

A for what? Aardvark? Arbok? Appendage? Anal? Ass? I'm dying of suspense here!

Fishfanatic 7

Oh dear I hope that doesn't happen to me! I'm having mine out in september as I have gained weight because of the hormones ( despite doing 3 high impact aerobics classes, 2 weights classes and 5, five mile walks every single week for the last 3 years, as well as eating the correct diet ) And I also detest children on an unimaginable scale so I wish to be sterilised ( which is what I wanted originally and am intending to fight the swines and their ageist discrimination every step of the way to get it ) I hope it heals quickly OP. Given that your body "sticks" to it, I presume you will choose a different form of contraceptive? .Having researched the coil I definitely do NOT want either version of it myself . Too many horror stories and it's not permanent enough for me !!

Get your tubes tied if you hate kids so much. Or better yet...abstinence. A potential child abuser stopped in her tracks!

You can try Depo Provera shots, you get them every 3 months, I haven't gained weight, so maybe that'll help you

Wow, how much weight did you gain? Your profile said you lost 60 pounds. Kudos!

59- Oh, I don't know about that, everyone's here to share opinions or laugh at them, I see no problem with her sharing her related story. :) Fishfanatic, good job losing the 60 lbs of weight that you have, I know from personal experience how great it feels for that level of accomplishment, as I had lost 80 lbs myself. The dress looks good on you. :) Cheers!

Squeaky_Tomato 14

Ugh wish I could be sterilized. For some reason they make us wait until we are 30. >.<

I gained 33 lbs on depo provera, nuva ring was my top pick for 15+ years, and a month ago I decided to get an IUD because it's as good as being sterile....they won't take my uterus out either because I'm too young and/or haven't had a child.... There's a great reason I haven't had one! Don't want one!

I'm curious about what odds you beat. If it was one every one hundred thousand, then I would go to the nearest casino. If it's one in a million, then I would stay inside during thunderstorms. But your doctor was probably making an excuse for his butterfingers.

So now you have a scar to show how responsible you are. Better then an unwanted pregnancy at the wrong time. Hope you're ready for kids.

You have no idea what you're talking about. The implant is meant to be removed after three years. If you leave it in after those three years, you basically have a stick of plastic in your arm. Then you get another one put in. Dumbass.

peachyFML 17

Also, there are other forms of birth control.

81- OP scarred from the first implant. Why would she get another? I was simply stating that she was smart for being responsible. And unless she uses another form of birth control, she will probably get pregnant if she's still having sex, which I'd hope she was ready for. You're assuming that she will get another implant. Now that's being a dumbass!

Why is that being a dumbass? It's a scar. I got one when mine was put in, I'll get another when it's taken out. But it's an efficient and long-lasting method of contraception with no worries about forgetting pills or breaking condoms. So when mines removed, and it'll be cut out because mines done what OPs has, I'll get one put straight in the other arm.

Weeeell.. I guess it beats the pain of an epideral? Or a baby dome (if you prefer natural). Or these ungodly cramps I hear of? I dunno. I'll give you half of my peanut butter and crack sandwich? It'll make things better ;)

unknown_user5566 26

Look at it this way: giving birth is A LOT more painful than having a contraceptive implant removed.

SapphireVelvet 8

Same happened to me 18 years ago. It hurt so bad. You'd think they'd have perfected the product and technique by now. So sorry. I understand what you went through.