Miscellaneous: Today, I had to convince my dad that text lingo causes brain...

By oh my dad - 13/02/2013 16:45 - United States - Florence

Today, I had to convince my dad that text lingo causes brain damage just to try to get him to stop. He actually believed me, and is telling everyone they have, or will receive brain damage soon. FML

I agree, your life sucks 13 348

You deserved it 28 991

The rhythm of the fight
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Same thing different taste

By hellbound - 12/07/2013 16:35 - United States - San Antonio

Today, I received a text from my dad, which was borderline-incomprehensible due to an insane amount of text language. I replied, jokingly asked if he had a stroke while writing it. A few seconds after hitting send, I remembered the stroke he suffered last month. FML

I agree, your life sucks 22 760

You deserved it 54 893

Prove me wrong

By Irony - 08/10/2009 11:40 - United States

Today, my dad took a call while driving. He always yells and curses at people who talk on their cell while driving. I asked him to get off the phone because it's dangerous, and told him he's being a hypocrite. He shook his head at me and continued talking. Seconds later, we got into an accident. FML

I agree, your life sucks 42 739

You deserved it 3 907

By Animeislyfe - 25/08/2015 02:56 - United States - Stockbridge

Today, my dad took my phone away because I "had to be texting while driving in order to wreck my car." I was too ashamed to tell him that a huge bug flew into my face causing me to veer off the road and into a brick mailbox. FML

I agree, your life sucks 20 188

You deserved it 7 606

Robocall

By Anonymous - 26/04/2024 02:00 - United States

Today, I have a horribly painful throat infection and can't talk. In spite of this, Dad keeps insisting I call people for him, meaning I have to make use of a text to speech program. Eight out of twelve people I've called on his behalf have hung up, thinking I'm a scambot. Dad is blaming me for it. FML

I agree, your life sucks 442

You deserved it 100

By oh gee, you don't say - 15/12/2012 18:43 - United Kingdom - Southampton

Today, my dad forced the whole family to sit through a two-hour lecture, with supporting research, on how the "Mayan prophecy" is actually a load of shit fabricated by conmen. Nice to know he thinks we're all borderline brain-dead, gullible fuckwits who believed it to begin with. Thanks, dad. FML

I agree, your life sucks 24 022

You deserved it 4 665

By K.. - 07/05/2011 17:38 - United States

Today, my dad demonstrated just how incredibly illiterate he is. He sent me a chain email about the awful lives of people with "Asparagus syndrome". FML

I agree, your life sucks 28 864

You deserved it 3 729

Drunk MC

By Anonymous - 11/03/2013 14:03 - Sweden - Sundbyberg

Today, my dad has been hitting the bottle, and will only respond to anything I say in a slurred rap. FML

I agree, your life sucks 31 499

You deserved it 3 033

By Anonymous - 01/09/2014 14:08 - United States

Today, I wrecked my car because my mom texted me, telling me not to text and drive. FML

I agree, your life sucks 25 626

You deserved it 45 015

Free healthcare, please?

By Anonymous - 11/01/2023 22:00

Today, I have brain damage, no two ways about it, because I had mumps as a child that caused my brain to swell. I just found out I only got mumps because my dad lied to my mom about getting me vaccinated, because he was too cheap to pay for it. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 259

You deserved it 84

Grown-ass man

By Anonymous - 03/02/2022 05:59 - Canada - Ottawa

Today, my 61 year-old father snatched a letter from my hands and threw four different fits because he misread it four different times, then yelled at me for "not reading it properly." I had to explain it to him. FML

I agree, your life sucks 836

You deserved it 92

HowieDoIt 21

Wednesday 13 February 2013 19:08

He must have hit his head when he rofl'd

perdix 29

Wednesday 13 February 2013 19:10

OMG, I LOL'd and then I had to STFU and CTFD. I guess YOLO and mine is almost over. S2BM (sucks to be me, just made that 1 up :) )

Comments

TrilliousDivine 9

Thursday 14 February 2013 0:42

That's probably the best solution i have heard to this "Learned Stupidity" Good job!!!!

laden_swallow09 34

Thursday 14 February 2013 1:04

What, it doesn't?

Contravene 10

Thursday 14 February 2013 2:31

I like to go with "potassium" for that particular response.

lifeisgood_03 8

Thursday 14 February 2013 7:16

my dad didnt know what IDK meant.. he thought it was a freeway

ao9s7yashdun 7

Thursday 14 February 2013 7:25

Thank you.

Satoaoi 13

Thursday 14 February 2013 8:51

adults like to text too you know. did you know sine adults know more text lingo than kids. Shame on you for trying to spoil it fir him

hsRoseTyler5 14

Thursday 14 February 2013 10:12

Great job! I wonder if I could convince everyone I know who does it as well...

FlamingoAlchemy 4

Thursday 14 February 2013 15:31

And his dad told everyone that text lingo causes brain damage... in text lingo.

mrebeccan 19

Thursday 14 February 2013 18:09

that is bloody brilliant!!! i am gonna steal that for my mom

TheMystery13 13

Friday 22 February 2013 7:38

How is this a bad thing? And just for your information, text speak doesn't CAUSE brain damage, it's a RESULT of it.

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The Top

Today, I got a spray tan for the first time. Naked, I climbed into the booth. When the machine started I became frightened by the loud roar of the spray and couldn't breathe. I pissed myself out of fear. I now have river-like streaks down both legs where the pee washed my tan away. FML

I agree, your life sucks 25 905

You deserved it 91 026

Today, I yelled at my little brother for leaving the toilet seat up and told him he needed to go around the house and make sure they were all down. I went to the bathroom later to find that the toilet seats and covers from every toilet had all been removed and were sitting on my bed. FML

I agree, your life sucks 17 997

You deserved it 68 601

The Top

Today, I was saying goodbye to all my close friends before I move out of state. I'd made plans with one friend in particular to meet up before I move away; he didn't bother to respond to my message or calls. Guess I confused a coworker for a friend, huh? FML

I agree, your life sucks 934

You deserved it 167

Today, I got pulled over and was given a ticket because my exhaust was too loud. I got this ticket while on my way to get said exhaust fixed. FML

I agree, your life sucks 13 294

You deserved it 1 014

Today, my best friend of 12 years traveled cross country to help me recover from major surgery. I've been sitting in the hospital by myself while she has sex in my empty apartment with some guy she met. FML

I agree, your life sucks 5 657

You deserved it 492

Today, my boss fired me. I can't really explain the slap I gave him for it, though. FML

I agree, your life sucks 351

You deserved it 206

Today, I went to the airport to pick up my long-distance boyfriend. Having waited six months for this, I was stoked. After waiting for three hours and sending numerous messages, I was eventually informed I was a week early. FML

I agree, your life sucks 24 824

You deserved it 14 282

Today, at 2 am on a Saturday, I purposely updated my Facebook status from my iPod so people will see that I posted from a 'mobile device' and think I'm out at a bar having a life, instead of sitting at home on my bed watching movies on my Netflix. FML

I agree, your life sucks 15 925

You deserved it 33 663